Deathbeds
We've Done Things Wrong Before.
Oliver
I couldn’t take anymore silence she needed comfort.
“I am so sorry for what I did; I didn’t mean to make you think that. I don’t want to mess you about but I really didn’t expect for Katlyn to be like that I mean we are only friends but she went mental, she said that if I met you then she wouldn’t be at my place when I got back, I didn’t know where I stood with you but with Katlyn I knew that she wouldn’t leave me as long as I let you go at that point I thought It was better for the both of us, that way you didn’t have the fear of me walking out again. Katlyn is no longer a problem she’s finished with me so you don’t have to worry about me letting you down again. I’m going to help you get through this okay? I’m sorry about your mum but they’ve never treated you right so of course you’re not going to feel anything, but I’ll stand with you when you make a decision of whether you want to see her again, but don’t feel like you have to remember it was them who didn’t want you. Maybe you just need to get some sleep although it is only 4pm but get some rest.”
She didn’t move at all, her breathing had softened I looked down to my shoulder to see she had fallen asleep.
“My conversations that boring eh, let’s take you to bed”
I carefully picked her up, she was as light as a feather which was good for me but it also concerned me I put her down on the bed putting the cover around her. I thought back to her being so light, was she eating enough? Probably not when I looked in her fridge there was hardly anything there. I knew what I was going to do but I’d need her house keys for it there’s no way I’m leaving the door unlocked with her in here asleep. I looked around for the keys until I eventually find them. I leave a note and head out of the door getting into my car and heading for the supermarket once more.
She probably didn’t have enough money to fill her cupboards and fridge/freezer I wasn’t going to let her go hungry, I picked up anything I could think of that would be quick and easy for her to do once she got home, she’s more than likely going to be angry at me for this but I’m sure I can charm my way around it. I was worried about her so I needed to help. I hope this shows that I do care for her.
Lacie
I had woken up from a sleep I didn’t know I needed, realising that Oli had put me to bed. I wonder if he was still around or he had done a runner probably the latter if I knew him although I hoped he had stuck around. I checked to see what the time was 19:35 I had two hours of sleep which means I won’t be sleeping tonight. I got up from my bed and slowly walked into the rest of the apartment to be greeted with a beaming smile in my kitchen.
“You’re awake”
“Obviously”
“How was your nap?”
“You call that a nap? That’s a sleep for me. It was good though.”
“It was 2 hours, it’s a nap silly. Don’t tell me you only get 2 hours of sleep?”
“You’re crazy, and yeah but only because I’ve never slept very well. Any way why are you in my kitchen and why are there carrier bags around you?”
“You should get more sleep. Well don’t shout at me but I notice your fridge and cupboards were empty so I may or may not have filled them up again, I wasn’t sure what to get so I just grabbed things that are easy for you to cook up once you get in from work I also bought you things to make sandwiches with for work instead of you having to pay for their food. Oh and next Saturday you can come with me to do this again and then I can take you out for dinner?”
I wasn’t sure what to think, no one had done something like this for me before. Food wasn’t important to me, and no one had noticed it before. I wasn’t sure if I should be angry or happy, I wasn’t about to let him do this all the time though.
“Oli, thank you. No one’s ever done that for me before, how much was all of this? I can give you the money back, you can’t pay for this. What about your own food for your place? You can take me for dinner next week but you’re not taking me shopping again I can make this last till I have the money.”
“Thank you for not being mad at me, I wasn’t sure if I had done the right thing but I felt bad and was worried about you, you’re so tiny. You don’t owe me anything okay? I want to do this for you, I owe you so much. I have enough money to do mine and yours okay? So shut up and help me pack away will you?”
“Fine, haven’t you got to be home at some point?”
“I thought I’d stay here”
“Why?”
“My house is lonely, Matts not there nor is Katlyn, I don’t fancy being on my own”
“Where are you going to stay, you do realise I only have one room”
“I’ll sleep on the sofa it’s not like it cold in your apartment. I just want to have some company”
“Well I have work tomorrow so I’ll leave the keys with you that way you can lock up alright?”
“Deal”
I looked over at him kneeling down at a cupboard he smiled at me, that’s the smile I have missed. He was being so sweet; I couldn’t let him go home I didn’t want him to go home. I started passing him things down.
Once everything was put away Oli revealed a ps4
“I went back to mine to grab this baby, wanna play?”
“Is it okay if I just watch?”
“Of course, I am the master at this anyway, wouldn’t want to embarrass you lovely”
I know he was saying it to get me to play but I really didn’t want to I wasn’t good at gaming, but I liked watching someone else play.
“I’m going to go get some PJs on okay?”
“Okay sweetie”
I left the room taking in a huge deep breath. Why is he going to all this effort just to please me? Is it because he feels he needs to after letting me down? Or is it because he knew he’d be leaving again so he was trying to make the impact hurt less. Although we haven’t been talking again for long I still hated the thought of him leaving me, I wanted to get used to him here and being back in my life. I think I was ready for him to be a part of my life. I didn’t realise how much I had missed him until tonight, I was going to stop shutting him out, I need to let him know everything I have to remember that we were younger when we were together, no one could handle me the way I was. Not even my parents could handle me. How could I expect a 17 year old boy to take it? He was older now though maybe he could deal with it.
I had been sat deep in my thoughts for about 10 minutes when Oli shook my legs.
“Earth to Lacie”
“Sorry I zoned out”
“I noticed. Is there anything you want to talk about?”
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to let him in just yet.
“I understand you know”
“Understand what Lace?”
“Why you left me, how could I expect a 17 year old to look after me when I was struggling to look after myself, my parents didn’t know what to do with me? I couldn’t expect that from you”
“You should stop thinking about the past; it’s going to eat away at you. I don’t have all the answers, I should have been there It’s not like I had known you for five minutes, we’d been together for 3 years I should have stood up for you and been there, I’ve always been angry at walking away from you it’s not easy for you to just accept me coming back and that’s okay but please don’t make excuses for my behaviour. I don’t expect it okay?”
“I’m not making excuses; I’m just making it easier to forgive you”
“You don’t have to forgive me; you just have to let me try again”
“Okay”
“You’re not going to leave me again are you?”
Oliver
I looked over at her and she looked so small and fragile, I didn’t want that for her. She was scared of the answer but she didn’t need to be. I was going to try my best to never leave her again. She’s the best thing that happened to me and I let her go once I can’t do it again. Being friends with her was better than nothing but I wanted so much more, I just didn’t know that before. I knew that she didn’t feel the same. She hardly trusted me so I can’t expect her to just go back to how things were before everything happened.
“I couldn’t leave you. You need me and for once I’m going to be there for you. That’s if you’ll let me”
All she did was nod her head and smile trying to hold back a few tears. I opened my arms to invite her to lie down and lean on me. She didn’t refuse; I turned the PS4 back on and started to play games. I kept stealing glances and her. I smiled to myself; I needed to keep her close I couldn’t fuck up anymore.Not just for Lacie but for me too. I really didn’t want to lose her again.
I couldn’t take anymore silence she needed comfort.
“I am so sorry for what I did; I didn’t mean to make you think that. I don’t want to mess you about but I really didn’t expect for Katlyn to be like that I mean we are only friends but she went mental, she said that if I met you then she wouldn’t be at my place when I got back, I didn’t know where I stood with you but with Katlyn I knew that she wouldn’t leave me as long as I let you go at that point I thought It was better for the both of us, that way you didn’t have the fear of me walking out again. Katlyn is no longer a problem she’s finished with me so you don’t have to worry about me letting you down again. I’m going to help you get through this okay? I’m sorry about your mum but they’ve never treated you right so of course you’re not going to feel anything, but I’ll stand with you when you make a decision of whether you want to see her again, but don’t feel like you have to remember it was them who didn’t want you. Maybe you just need to get some sleep although it is only 4pm but get some rest.”
She didn’t move at all, her breathing had softened I looked down to my shoulder to see she had fallen asleep.
“My conversations that boring eh, let’s take you to bed”
I carefully picked her up, she was as light as a feather which was good for me but it also concerned me I put her down on the bed putting the cover around her. I thought back to her being so light, was she eating enough? Probably not when I looked in her fridge there was hardly anything there. I knew what I was going to do but I’d need her house keys for it there’s no way I’m leaving the door unlocked with her in here asleep. I looked around for the keys until I eventually find them. I leave a note and head out of the door getting into my car and heading for the supermarket once more.
She probably didn’t have enough money to fill her cupboards and fridge/freezer I wasn’t going to let her go hungry, I picked up anything I could think of that would be quick and easy for her to do once she got home, she’s more than likely going to be angry at me for this but I’m sure I can charm my way around it. I was worried about her so I needed to help. I hope this shows that I do care for her.
Lacie
I had woken up from a sleep I didn’t know I needed, realising that Oli had put me to bed. I wonder if he was still around or he had done a runner probably the latter if I knew him although I hoped he had stuck around. I checked to see what the time was 19:35 I had two hours of sleep which means I won’t be sleeping tonight. I got up from my bed and slowly walked into the rest of the apartment to be greeted with a beaming smile in my kitchen.
“You’re awake”
“Obviously”
“How was your nap?”
“You call that a nap? That’s a sleep for me. It was good though.”
“It was 2 hours, it’s a nap silly. Don’t tell me you only get 2 hours of sleep?”
“You’re crazy, and yeah but only because I’ve never slept very well. Any way why are you in my kitchen and why are there carrier bags around you?”
“You should get more sleep. Well don’t shout at me but I notice your fridge and cupboards were empty so I may or may not have filled them up again, I wasn’t sure what to get so I just grabbed things that are easy for you to cook up once you get in from work I also bought you things to make sandwiches with for work instead of you having to pay for their food. Oh and next Saturday you can come with me to do this again and then I can take you out for dinner?”
I wasn’t sure what to think, no one had done something like this for me before. Food wasn’t important to me, and no one had noticed it before. I wasn’t sure if I should be angry or happy, I wasn’t about to let him do this all the time though.
“Oli, thank you. No one’s ever done that for me before, how much was all of this? I can give you the money back, you can’t pay for this. What about your own food for your place? You can take me for dinner next week but you’re not taking me shopping again I can make this last till I have the money.”
“Thank you for not being mad at me, I wasn’t sure if I had done the right thing but I felt bad and was worried about you, you’re so tiny. You don’t owe me anything okay? I want to do this for you, I owe you so much. I have enough money to do mine and yours okay? So shut up and help me pack away will you?”
“Fine, haven’t you got to be home at some point?”
“I thought I’d stay here”
“Why?”
“My house is lonely, Matts not there nor is Katlyn, I don’t fancy being on my own”
“Where are you going to stay, you do realise I only have one room”
“I’ll sleep on the sofa it’s not like it cold in your apartment. I just want to have some company”
“Well I have work tomorrow so I’ll leave the keys with you that way you can lock up alright?”
“Deal”
I looked over at him kneeling down at a cupboard he smiled at me, that’s the smile I have missed. He was being so sweet; I couldn’t let him go home I didn’t want him to go home. I started passing him things down.
Once everything was put away Oli revealed a ps4
“I went back to mine to grab this baby, wanna play?”
“Is it okay if I just watch?”
“Of course, I am the master at this anyway, wouldn’t want to embarrass you lovely”
I know he was saying it to get me to play but I really didn’t want to I wasn’t good at gaming, but I liked watching someone else play.
“I’m going to go get some PJs on okay?”
“Okay sweetie”
I left the room taking in a huge deep breath. Why is he going to all this effort just to please me? Is it because he feels he needs to after letting me down? Or is it because he knew he’d be leaving again so he was trying to make the impact hurt less. Although we haven’t been talking again for long I still hated the thought of him leaving me, I wanted to get used to him here and being back in my life. I think I was ready for him to be a part of my life. I didn’t realise how much I had missed him until tonight, I was going to stop shutting him out, I need to let him know everything I have to remember that we were younger when we were together, no one could handle me the way I was. Not even my parents could handle me. How could I expect a 17 year old boy to take it? He was older now though maybe he could deal with it.
I had been sat deep in my thoughts for about 10 minutes when Oli shook my legs.
“Earth to Lacie”
“Sorry I zoned out”
“I noticed. Is there anything you want to talk about?”
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to let him in just yet.
“I understand you know”
“Understand what Lace?”
“Why you left me, how could I expect a 17 year old to look after me when I was struggling to look after myself, my parents didn’t know what to do with me? I couldn’t expect that from you”
“You should stop thinking about the past; it’s going to eat away at you. I don’t have all the answers, I should have been there It’s not like I had known you for five minutes, we’d been together for 3 years I should have stood up for you and been there, I’ve always been angry at walking away from you it’s not easy for you to just accept me coming back and that’s okay but please don’t make excuses for my behaviour. I don’t expect it okay?”
“I’m not making excuses; I’m just making it easier to forgive you”
“You don’t have to forgive me; you just have to let me try again”
“Okay”
“You’re not going to leave me again are you?”
Oliver
I looked over at her and she looked so small and fragile, I didn’t want that for her. She was scared of the answer but she didn’t need to be. I was going to try my best to never leave her again. She’s the best thing that happened to me and I let her go once I can’t do it again. Being friends with her was better than nothing but I wanted so much more, I just didn’t know that before. I knew that she didn’t feel the same. She hardly trusted me so I can’t expect her to just go back to how things were before everything happened.
“I couldn’t leave you. You need me and for once I’m going to be there for you. That’s if you’ll let me”
All she did was nod her head and smile trying to hold back a few tears. I opened my arms to invite her to lie down and lean on me. She didn’t refuse; I turned the PS4 back on and started to play games. I kept stealing glances and her. I smiled to myself; I needed to keep her close I couldn’t fuck up anymore.Not just for Lacie but for me too. I really didn’t want to lose her again.
Notes
So the chapter I uploaded last night some how managed to mess up. So here's the new edited version. No Oli has not been kidnapped although that would have made an interesting story.
Thanks to piercingirisash for comments otherwise I wouldn't have spotted my mistake.
That's what you get for rushing things.
Anyway everyone should go listen to fort hope
Kay
xo
Lol well I'm glad he's okay.
Ik it was too good to hope they started getting close. They gave things to work out and she doesn't trust him. But I hope they can be happy eventually, or at least not let this drag them down
1/7/16