The Throw-Aways

That. Was. Amazing.

Fifteen minutes after the set and I still couldn’t get over it. A smile was glued on my face, twisting my lips into a broad grin. If only Jay could see me now. Who was the better musician now? With a silent chuckle, I grasped my bottle of water and started to walk with the band to our signing.

“Told you she was a great!” Jack gave me a quick high-five as he passed me. They were going to be up next on the stage, but had another ten minutes before they had to go on. The rest of the band congratulated everyone on a great set.

“Still nervous?” Austin asked me, slowing down to walk beside me. I shook my head. That one concert had completely eradicated my fear of going on stage. The thousand or so fans really gave me a confidence boost.

I owed it all to them.

“No, but I think I’ll really get into the swing of things after a few more shows.” I responded. Austin’s halo of brown hair bobbed, a silent affirmation. We kept walking towards the signings tent. A security guard led the procession, weaving in and around barriers until we got to the tent. As I looked up from the pavement, I saw a crowd of fans that screamed our name.

“Are you ready to meet some fans?” Alan chuckled to me. I nodded and sat down in our seats. There was Monster by our feet and sharpies scattered over the table. My press badge sat lightly against my chest as I looked to meet the first people in line.

A little boy about nine years old walked up to me. Since I was new to the band, I got the seat on the farthest end of the table, so people had to go through the entire band before they could get to me. It was a little shocking to see this boy along at a concert like this, but I saw his mother standing a ways away. His green eyes peered up at me in fear. Aaron had just given him a high five and now he passed a poster to me.

“Hey there! What’s your name?” I asked him. I was a little socially awkward around little kids but hey, you had to get used to it! Besides, he was kind of adorable.

“Tanner.” He mumbled. I beamed at him, stroking a stray piece of black hair behind my ear. Taking his poster, I uncapped my sharpie and signed my name near the bottom where there was some free space.

“You’re pretty.” He grinned like a fool and I blushed a little. The teen behind him laughed.

“Thanks. You’re a real charmer.” I grinned to him. Today was a day to have fun and meet fans, not worry about what others thought of me or how the set went. I put a little heart by my name and handed him back the poster. His green eyes shone like emeralds as he bounced off to his mother. I waved at the woman who gave me a silent thanks and took her son off to see another band.

And so the afternoon went on like that.

I signed posters, hats, shirts, and anything else they handed me. I gave a bunch of people hugs and heard them say that they loved that I joined. A few girls said that they wished they had the confidence to go up on stage like that.

Oh how I wish I could tell them my story.

Eventually the line was getting pretty short and our time was wearing down. There was only a few more patient bystanders waiting in line for the singing and greeting. A girl came through the line and I was ready with my sharpie and sore arms. I didn’t care how much longer it took or how tired I was, I just couldn’t wait to meet people!

“Hi Raven.” The girl started shyly. Her hair was blonde and her wrists were lined with band wristbands. I saw All Time Low, Pierce the Veil, Suicide Silence, and Sleeping with Sirens among the collection of names. Her eyes showed worry and a hidden story. It seemed like she was scared. I knew that feeling.

“Hey there. What’s your name? I like your wristbands.” I noted. She glanced down at the plastic surrounding her small wrists.

“I’m Bells. Thank you. I get a band for every performance I see.” Her entire being was starting to loosen up and relax. Austin and the others were talking with the final people. We were in no hurry and I saw no reason to not talk to this girl.

“That’s pretty neat. I really like you Suicide Silence one. Mitch seemed like a pretty cool guy. I wish I could’ve met him.” I noted, looking at two of the bands on her. One was a Mitch memorial that caught my eye. Bells twisted that one around so the words were more visible.

“Yeah, I do to. Oh, I have something for you.” Her eyes widened at the thought. I blushed deeply. People had given me letters and little gifts throughout the day, even though I had barely been with the band for a month.

The girl pulled a folded blanket out of her red drawstring bag. I stood up and took it, admiring the fabric. It was black with a white ampersand in the middle. It was the logo of the band. I beamed and gave her a hug.

“I heard you needed a blanket and I decided this was the best way to say thank you.” Bells smiled at me. I couldn’t stop beaming. It was awesome and just made my day.

Sometimes it got cold on the bus and since the sheets are pretty thin, there wasn’t much help to keep warm. Blankets were in short supply and it was a first come, first serve basis. Only two days ago while we were on the road and it seemed like the air conditioner wouldn’t turn off, I sent out a tweet.

@LittleBlackBird: Geez. I’m cold and @AlanAshby is hogging all blankets. Wanted: A blanket right now before I freeze to death.

That was the tweet and thankfully, someone had heard my pleas. As I thought what she said, I perked up.

“Thank you?”

“Yeah. A few years ago my dad died and now I fell into depression. I’m five months clean now, just because your music gave me strength.” The girl pulled down some of her bands to show me little white lines the zig zagged across the pink flesh. I bit my lip to hold back tears. Looking up, I saw she was doing the same. I took her hand in mine, holding her liquid gaze.

“I’m so proud of you that you’re clean. I’m so proud that you’re fighting. Bells, you’re so strong and I want you to keep being like that. You can get through anything, I promise. Sometimes it seems like the world is against you, but there will always be one person on your side. Even when it looks like there’s no one standing next to you, you can count on me to be there. Okay?” I told her. She started crying and I wrapped my arms around her.

“Okay.” Her small voice sniffed back. I continued to hold her until her sobs stopped and she held still. I pulled away and signed her poster, writing “stay strong, you can do this!” by my name. I handed it to her and she threw out a wobbly smile.

“Thank you so much, Raven.” She whispered and I nodded.

“I believe in you. You can do this!” I cheered softly. Watching her depart, I knew that this was only a taste of the lives that Of Mice and Men has changed.

Notes

Yay! So Raven just made it through her first concert/signing/meet and greet! Now for more adventures on the road!!