Leaving the cave, going into the unknown

I’ve never been very good at dealing with death, and I’ve been lucky that it has not come my way often in life. I’m not saying that any one is good at handling death but while others pass through the grief period I tend to just stay in it.

I had woken up in a hospital bed 4 hours ago to the sound of machines beeping, soft whispers and coos. I opened my eyes to see Austin, Kate and Melody waiting for me at my bedside. The events of what had happened were still fresh in my mind and the sight of Alan’s limp body next to mine was like a picture stamped into my brain. Before I could speak Austin informed me that I was okay, I was bruised everywhere but I would be fine in a couple of weeks. Alan however was in surgery due to a collapsed lung and some internal bleeding. They weren’t sure if he was going to make it or not.

So here I am now, sitting in a hospital bed with my month old daughter sleeping in my arms. She was so peaceful and happy as if nothing bad was happening in the world at this moment. If Alan were to die I don’t know what I’d do, how I’d tell her. I didn’t know if I should cry or scream, so I just sat there with her in my arms to calm me down. The thought of her not being able to have a father shattered me, but the thought of not having him in my life hurt me a little more. Austin blamed himself for some reason, saying that if he wouldn’t have forced us to go out this never would have happened. It was a ridiculous thing to think, he didn’t force the man who drove into us to drink and drive. It seemed no matter how many times I told him that it wasn’t his fault it didn’t matter, he had his mind set on the truth he made up in his head.

Alan was due out of surgery any moment and all of us were on edge. The rest of the band showed up after I woke up and Val came to support us all. The term ‘any minute now’ has never felt so long, I wished the suffering would end.

“Ms. Case?” My head shot up at the sound, it was the doctor in charge of Alan’s case.

“Yes?” No one took any breath in that moment, just waiting for an answer.

“We’ve finished with Mr. Ashby, he’s going to pull through but he’s still under anesthesia. He’ll need to take it easy for a while but he should be fine. You were both very lucky.” In that moment, the reality of the situation hit me and I started to cry; not the ‘I’m sad’ type of crying, it was the type of crying that would surely cause a small ocean around you if you continued for too long. I felt movement in my arms and looked down to see Melody moving around slightly, a little wet by my tears. I stopped crying and looked into her eyes then pulled her close to me while she cooed in my ear. She wouldn’t have to know what growing up without a dad would be like. He would get to see her grown up, and we would grow old together.

“Can I see him?” I asked the doctor, when I looked up I saw everyone looking at me with smiles on their faces.

“If you want yes, just be very careful and use a wheel chair. I can get a nurse to help you…” Val cut him off immediately.

“No no I can do it. Come on Alex let’s go see your man.” I giggled a bit and handed Melody off to Austin while Val helped me get into the wheel chair.

“You never stop taking care of me do you Val?” I quipped.

“And I will keep doing so until I’m too old to get up.” She said, I smiled at her and Austin handed me back Melody.

“Off we go!” Val said while wheeling me off to Alan’s room, he was a floor above me but soon enough we were there.

Upon entering the room my heart stopped, there lying in the bed was a very beat up Alan. He was black and blue all over with wires and tubes attached everywhere. I was wheeled over to his bedside; I had Dee in one hand and Alan’s hand in the other. I took in a deep breathe of relief knowing that my family would be alright, we’d make it through like always. I rested my head on the hand I was holding, feeling his warmth on my cheek.

“We’re going to be okay, we’re going to be fine.”

Notes

Sorry it's a little shorter, i was dealing with thanksgiving stuff all weekend.
I was going to wait for tomorrow but i just couldn't help but update cause i hate cliffhangers myself. Comment chillax and have a great week! And happy Thanksgiving to all Canadians!