One look was all it took.

Alan's P.O.V.

The second time he kissed me, he held onto me so tight, he kissed me so sweetly, I feel so much when I kiss him, how can he not feel anything back with a kiss like that?

We went back inside, his house was warm. We got dried off & dressed. Austin looked at me while I was dressing out of the shorts he let me borrow, I could feel his stare behind me. I didn't want to turn around though. I wanted to close the door but it'd be really awkward, my boxers were wet so I would have to ask him for some. But since he was looking at me, I didn't have to ask. He came over to me with a pair of his boxers in his hands.

"Here, use mine." Austin spoke, he was standing right behind me, his hot breath landing on my neck. I took the boxers from him. But he still stood there.

"Are you gonna change? Or do you need some help?" Austin asked. I closed my eyes & bit my lip. I didn't know what to say & I felt nervous. We just stood there until I felt Austins hands at the hem of my boxers. I froze, not knowing what to do. Austin slid them down all the way then they dropped to the floor, I closed my eyes the entire time. I knew Austin could see everything, I was too scared to look at him though. Austin took the boxers from me, then turned me around so I was facing him.

"Alan...open your eyes." Austin spoke. I slowly did what he said, only to see that his face was inches away from mine. I looked at him, he just bit his lip & put his hand to my face. I was a little confused.

"Look...I might not have the same feelings for you as you do for me, but that doesn't mean, it can't happen. So keep your hopes up high." Austin spoke. I nodded my head & then he placed a kiss to my lips, once more. I was so damn confused, why is he doing this? I'm getting a lot of mixed signals here & it's driving me crazy. Austin bent down & slipped the boxers on me, he slid them up, each time getting closer to my privates....I was so nervous, then when he finally came close to almost covering me, he stopped, licking his bottom lip.

"I don't think I want these on you..." Austin spoke. He was just looking at my dick, & I felt insanely uncomfortable. I was actually starting to get a little turned on by how long his head was down there. I felt myself getting hard & then panicked. I was going to turn around but then Austin stopped me.

"Looks like you're just as horny as I am." Austin laughed. I swallowed hard & felt myself blushing. I just really wanted this to be over.

"A-Austin...please, j-just put them on me...This is too much for me..." I spoke. Austin finally slid them up all the way & then came back up to face me.

"Kiss me..." Austin whispered. I hesitated but then did as he said. I don't understand Austin. What's he doing with me?

"You're a good kisser, little ginger." Austin spoke. I blushed at the nickname & he smiled when he noticed. He's making me nervous again. He has been all day.

"C'mon let's go eat something." Austin spoke, leaving me to stand breathless & confused in the bathroom.





It's been a whole month since that first day, since then we've hung out everyday & I go to his house all the time, I've met his friends which are now mine, he takes me on sort of dates (the way I look at it), he's only kissed me twice in this whole month. I'm just so confused. After everything that happened that first day, he acts like nothing's happened. Like we never once kissed, like I never told him I liked him.

I mean, I'm kind of glad that we aren't awkward about anything & still hanging out. But now he's left me confused & wondering why he did all that stuff. I just can't process it well. The more I know him, the more I feel like I'm falling in love with him. I don't think he likes me though, he treats me like a brother more than anything. It actually kind of sucks, I always see him flirting with a bunch of girls, getting their numbers & such. He hasn't dated any yet. He keeps saying he hasn't found the right one. They all seemed like good matches for him, to me.

He still hasn't been to my house, & he doesn't know much about me yet. Everytime he tries to find stuff out about me, I change the subject or tell him there's not much to tell. He know's my brother Aaron which is awesome, because they get along & sometimes Aaron is like my wing-man, he said he thinks I'd make a good match with Austin. I keep telling him Austin's not gay but he just won't believe me. He's set on this idea that Austin's just too scared to come out.

I'm at Austin's house right now, it's a Saturday, I had slept over yesterday on Friday. We've just been laying in his bed for the past two hours that we've been awake. We're talking about music & how badly we both want to be in a band. Halfway through our conversation, Austin asked me an off-topic question.

"Do ya still like me?" Austin asked. I looked at him & nodded. He smiled & held my hand. I didn't pull away, it felt nice & it's been a while since he's done something like this.

"I just wish I could give you what you want. I wish I could feel the same way, so you'd be happy." Austin spoke. I blushed a ton & then spoke up.

"But I am happy. I get to be with you everyday. Even if it's not the way I want it to be."

"I'm sorry." Austin spoke. He sounded hurt. Like there was something else he was apologizing for, like it wasn't just for me. We lied down in silence for a long time. Still holding each other's hand, we started another conversation. He finally let go of my hand & then we went downstairs.

"Hey! How did you boy's sleep?!" Austin's dad cheered. I always loved how happy he was. I love Austin's dad.

"We slept great, right Alan?" Austin asked.

"Yea, we did." I replied. Austin's dad had some breakfast ready & we started eating. Waffles, bacon, & some awesome toaster stroodles, with some milk. Austin's dad left for work, laving us all alone.

"So, what do you like about me so much?" Austin asked. Oh, here we go again.

"Everything." I responded.

"Why?"

"I don't know, you're just amazing....perfect to me."

"Same here..." Austin mumbled. I was a little thrown off for a second, I couldn't have heard that right, I mean he has food in his mouth. I asked him to repeat himself.

"What did you say?" I asked.

"I uh...I said, that's sweet." Austin replied, swallowing his food.

"Oh..." I was a little disappointed. Austin & I kept eating. His cat ended up getting on the table & got up on my shoulder. I was used to this, I have a cat too.

"Aye, he like you." Austin laughed.

"I love your laugh." I spoke.

"Thanks, I love your smile." Austin responded. I felt myself blush.

"I love your eyes." I said back. Austin blushed a light pink.

"I love your lips..." Austin replied.

"I love your jokes." I said.

"I love your selfies." Austin laughed.

"My selfies?!" I asked.

"Yea, you take sexy selfies." Austin spoke. I blushed & then laughed.

"Um...thank you."

"You finished eating?" Austin asked. I nodded & he put our plates in the sink. We went to the living room & started playing the xbox.

Notes

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