Come Waste Away With Me

We continued walking through people all rushing around to get done what needed to get done. “We already started the organizing and the boys are setting up the tent. I came to find you to come help Chloe and I organize the merch.” Josie commented as we walked.
“Was I supposed to meet you guys? Oh god I am sorry, Austin didn’t tell me I had to be here a certain time.” I mentally slapped myself. Good going late on your first day; way to make a good impression.
“Don’t fret, its fine no one is mad. Even if I told Austin you needed to be here at a certain time he would have probably forgotten. He tends to do that often.” She giggled earning a smile from me. She was correct about Austin he was either always late or exactly on time. “Come on we are almost there!”
Her speed increased slightly; I kept in pace with her as well as I could with people cutting past you like they didn’t even notice you were walking. I waved at Mike while he gave me a wink and handed me a cigarette as we passed by each other. I smiled and put it in my sweatshirt pocket. I’ll save that for later. We were by the tour buses again. I noticed a girl with green hair sitting cross-legged on the ground with boxes surrounding her. I also noticed that Josie had turned towards her and proceeded to walk in the girls direction. Maybe that was Chloe. She heard us approaching. She grinned when she looked from Josie to me.
She stood up and wiped her jeans before walking up to me. “Hi, I’m Chloe.”
Instead of offering her hand she just pulled me into a hug. “Hi.” I mumbled surprised.
She pulled away. “Sorry, I’m a hugger.”
“Oh it’s alright.” I told her honestly. I got a better look at her. She was petite; shorter than me. For being short her stature was just how it should be. She was skinny not sickly skinny but athletically skinny. Something I wish I was. She had hazel eyes which reminded me somewhat of a cat. Her hair was spring green with her bangs straightened and the rest of her hair was wavy. She was wearing ripped skinny jeans and a simple white tank top. She had what I think they call a Monroe piercing above her lip. It suited her.
“I can’t wait to get to know you! I think I could say the same for the rest of the merch crew.” Chloe took my hand and pulled me to the ground next to her in front of a box.
Josie nodded her head. “Yes we do. But I think we should wait until the guys get here so you don’t have repeat yourself. How does that sound?”
“That sounds good.” Truth is I would rather not talk about myself at all.
“Alright well we need to organize.” Josie reached into a box and took out some contents. “All you really need to do is make sure that all the shirts are the same size in one box and refold them so you know which shirt in each box. They get messed up any way but Chloe and I are really organized.”
“I get that. I’m super organized never a mess or thing out of place.” That was true my mind was a mess but I didn’t want anything of mine like my room be a huge mess also.
“Oh! It’s like I’m talking to myself!” We all laughed then went to work.
An hour passed by and we were almost finished. “Is this the famous Ariana?” I heard someone call from behind me. “She is even prettier than Alan described her.”
I felt a blush rise on my cheeks. Alan said I was pretty? “She is very beautiful.” Chloe smiled.
I followed the rest of the girls and stood up. “That is Dave, the one who is already flirting with you.” Josie pointed at a boy who looked around twentyish. He had brown hair that was shorter on the sides and longer on the top. It was gelled up a bit. He had stubble going down to his chin showing his perfect bone structure. He had deep brown eyes that shinned in the sun. Not going to lie he was extremely gorgeous. “And this is Brett.” She walked over and he intertwined his fingers with hers. I guess they are dating. He had wavy subtle ginger hair with a beard to go along with it. He was wearing sunglasses so I couldn’t see his eye color. But what I could tell was that he had to be older than Dave.
“Hi, it’s nice to meet you guys.” I waved slightly.
“You two boys help us carry the boxes into the bus. Then we can all bombard Ari with questions.” Chloe grinned while picking up a box.
I sighed involuntary earning looks from the rest of them. “Oh um, I just am bad at being in the spotlight.”
“Well get used to it darling because you are Austin’s sister. You are the center of attention.” Dave winked before following Chloe into the bus carrying a box. I frowned for a second before putting a smile back on my face. I picked up a box; oh my god this is so heavy. I lugged it into the bus and set it next to the others before taking a seat at the table. I leaned back and tried not to show my unhappy expression. They all crowded around me and it made me really uncomfortable. I shifted the way I was sitting. “Guy’s back up she’s uncomfortable.”
I smiled thankfully and Dave. Maybe he understood how I felt; I doubt it though. They all backed away thankfully and they took a seat at the table. Chloe, Josie and Brett were on the other side and Dave sat next to me.
“Ask away.” I told them.
“Are you single?” Of course that was Dave’s first question. I already know his personality very well for only knowing him the total of five minutes.
“Yep.” I answered quickly. He mumbled something; I didn’t catch it and I didn’t question him.
“What is it like being Austin’s sister?” Josie asked.
“It’s an experience. He is the best brother anyone could ask for; he is always there for me. He will drop everything for me if I ask. But we fight a lot; we just had a fight last night actually.” I could keep going but I ended it there.
“That’s so sweet well not the fighting part...” Josie commented making us all chuckle a bit.
“What’s your favorite color?” Brett questioned.
“Purple.”
“I have a deep question if you don’t mind me asking.” Chloe said hesitantly.
“Go ahead.” I held my breath.
“Austin said something about how you had a bad relationship and you are still having a hard time with it. Why?”
“He told you that?” I answered her with a question.
They nodded. “Well it is true but I don’t feel like talking about it.” I answered her curtly.
“Oh alright that’s fine.” She seemed a bit disappointed.
I wasn’t upset at her for asking I would want to know too but I just couldn’t talk about it. I pretended I got a text from someone. “Oh guys Austin wants to talk to me. I will talk to you later?”
They all nodded and I rushed out of the bus before the stubborn tears fell. I needed a lighter so I could light this cigarette. Or I needed something stronger. That’s when I smelt it. Weed. I followed the smell to I think Pierce the Veil’s tour bus. I wiped my eyes furiously; I hated when I cried it made me feel weak. I am weak. During my little breakdown in my mind I saw Mike leaning on the bus taking a drag.
I walked over to him cautiously. “Hey Mike.”
“Ari, what’s up?” He barely opened his eyes.
“I don’t want to bother you or anything but can I have a smoke?” I nervously asked.
“Of weed?” I nodded. “You keep surprising me Carlile.”
“I’m full of surprises.” I said unemotionally.
He handed me one and lit it. I breathed in the smoke before exhaling. Instantly I felt the slight high take over. Before long I felt much more relaxed and was no longer angry. I noticed Mike staring, I raised an eyebrow but he only shrugged.
He finally spoke. “Were you crying?”
I was hoping he would be too high to notice it guess I was wrong. “Yea, but I’m alright now.”
He grinned from ear to ear. “Gooood.”
I laughed a little too hard at him but it caused him to laugh before long it turned into a laughing fest with people staring. I smoked a few more with him before saying goodbye and making my way toward my tour bus or my brother’s tour bus. By the time I got there I was giggling at myself for being clumsy from tripping every few steps. Oh great anyone who saw me could tell I was high.
Why did I choose to come here? My brother was probably here. Whoops. I noticed two people standing outside the bus one was a signature ginger and the other an amazing drummer. “ALAN! TINO!” Oh god I just made myself known and I was being obnoxious.
“Ari, how was the first day?” Tino asked.
“Oh well I cried but eh not much different from any other day.” I laughed even though I shouldn’t have.
“You cried? Why? Did they say something to you?” Alan was avoiding me till I said that.
“Well apparently Austin told them about my bad relationship so they asked me about it.” I shrugged. “No big deal I overreacted. I seem to be doing that a lot.” I dragged out some of the words to emphasize the words.
“Are you high?” Alan pulled me closer looking at my eyes; I felt his breath on my face.
I giggled. “Are you angry Mr. grumpy gills?”
“Who got you high?” He let go of my arm and sighed clearly aggravated. “Get in the tour bus.”
“You are not my father.” I crossed my arms trying to keep a straight face falling at it miserably.
“Yea but I can go get your brother.” He was clearly outraged.
“Ooo scary.” I joked but I went into the bus.
“Go take a nap and I will talk to you about this later.” He ordered.
“You are no fun.” I pouted.
“What the hell happened to you Ari?” Alan asked more calmly but his eyebrows knitted together showing his confusion.
“Obviously you haven’t paid much attention to me then because nothing about me has changed.” I glared at him before stomping to my bunk. Now the anger was back. I heard the door to the bus slam shut. I was now alone, the high was gone, and I am now going back into the darkness of my mind. Memories of the past flashed through my mind. I squeezed my eyes shut trying to get them to go away but it was no use. I reached under my pillow and pulled out the oh so familiar piece of metal. I rolled up my sleeves and let my emotions get the best of me.

Notes

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