Come Waste Away With Me

Yesterday went like any other day. I went and watched Andy play as I promised. I met the rest of his band and they are so sweet. They joked around with me and Andy but we didn’t mind. I sort of talked to Alan but he still seemed distant. Austin is oblivious to everything going on as usual but I did tell him that Andy and I are no longer a “thing”. He didn’t comment about it though. He just nodded and asked if I was okay. I told him I was. That was really what the rest of the day of the day. Nothing interesting happened and no texts from the asshole. I couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling in my stomach though.
I was currently lying in my bunk wishing I could go back to sleep but I knew I couldn’t. I have work today. I had to be at the merch bus at nine today since Warped in Northern California didn’t start until one. It was eight now but I was still procrastinating. My curtain pulled open and to my surprise it was Alex. “Wear something cute today.”
“Um, why?” I rubbed my eyes confused.
“You are singing with me on stage at three-thirty!” He cheered earning groans from the bunks around us.
“I’m what?” I began feeling nervous.
“I told you that you are singing Remembering Sunday with me the other day and today is the day.” He smirked.
“Alex.” I groaned.
“Please, I will be devastated if you say no.” His puppy dog look appeared on his face. Darn you Alex.
“Fine, now move I need to get ready.” I picked my clothes earning an agreeing look from Alex before I trudged my way into the bathroom. I didn’t have time to shower so I made do with my hair. I pulled on my stockings that had a simple pattern of stars going down the leg. I pulled the dress I chose over my head. I grinned. I hadn’t worn this dress yet but it was my favorite. The design was Adventure Time themed. One of my favorite shows. I slipped on my Hakuna Matata bracelet before applying my makeup. I slipped on my black TOMS before skipping out of the bathroom.
“It’s Vans Warped Tour not TOMS Warped Tour.” Alan joked when his gaze got to my shoes. I stuck my tongue out at him.
“Hush.” I was surprised he was joking with me; maybe he forgot about yesterday. “Did you hear? I’m apparently singing with All Time Low today.” I gave Austin a look. “At let he gave me a few hours to prepare.”
Austin chuckled. “Eat your breakfast.” I sat down at the table with a bowl of cereal.
“So Ari, I was thinking about how you need more tattoos.” Alan stated randomly.
“Oh really?” I smirked I did want more.
“Yea so I was wondering when we get to Los Angeles if you would go get a tattoo with me?” Alan stuttered slightly.
“Are you asking my sister on a date?” Austin gasped.
“No! I want it to be like old times when we hung out.” My heart dropped at his words.
“I’ll go with you.” I smiled.
“What do you want to get?” He questioned.
“A trouble clef and a base clef that form a heart on my index finger.” I grinned even though it was small I wanted it.
“That seems like the perfect tattoo for you Ari.” Alan said making the others nod. “I’ll make the appointment.” He made his way to the back of the bus typing the number into his phone.
“You ready Aribear?” I nodded standing up.
“Be ready for three-thirty babe.” Alex winked.
“I will be watching.” Austin smiled linking his arm with mine.
“Oh great.” I rolled my eyes pulling Austin from the bus.
“So I was thinking we should have a brother and sister day.”
“I like the sound of that idea.”
He rubbed his chin thinking. “How about tomorrow night after I perform and after your tattoo appointment we can go around L.A. until the time the buses leave?”
“Okay!” I giggled and suddenly I was really looking forward to tomorrow.
“Are you going to help set up the tent?”
“I usually just sit and watch.” His eyes crinkled.
“You lazy butt.” I elbowed his side.
“Ow, I have to perform later.” He put on a serious face.
“So I can’t do this?” I elbowed him again.
“You’re going to get it.” He started tickling my sides making me start laughing uncontrollably. “Austin, stop!” I managed to say between laughs. He listened and pulled away. “You are a poop.”
“A poop really?” He shook his head.
“Don’t judge me.” I stuck my finger in his face.
“I thought we got you to curse?”
“I only curse when necessary.” Which is true; I didn’t want to become someone who uses vulgar language on a daily basis in every sentence.
“That’s fine Aribear.” That was the end of our one on one conversation because we reached the bus and everyone was talking to us about random things. Austin did help us set up which didn’t surprise me. I told them about how I had to leave before three-thirty but they told me they already knew. Why does everyone know things before me? Afterwards Brett was cracking jokes making us all laugh. He does it every time making everyone’s day better.
My phone beeped. I was sort of scared to look at what it was. I was tagged in Austin’s picture on Instagram. I gave him a glare before I looked at the picture. It was a picture of me laughing with my hand over my mouth. I think that is a Carlile family trait because Austin does the same thing. It wasn’t a bad picture the sun was in the right spot and I looked pretty. You could see my scars though. The comment he wrote made me smile.
austincarlile- my sister @aricariebear is beautiful #imgladsheisfinallyhappy #recoveryistough #butsheisstrong
I ran over and hugged him. “I love you Aussie.”
“I love you too.” He returned the hug without delay.
**
It was now three-twenty and my heart was racing. I walked to the stage All Time Low was performing on. I couldn’t keep my hands from shaking. “Bestie!” Alex yelled He ran over picking me up and spinning me around. “Are you excited? Because I am!”
“I’m nervous.” I said once he put me down.
“Don’t be nervous! You look great, your voice is amazing, and you are just awesome.” He grabbed my hand pulling me closer to the stage. “You will come out when I call you and then you can leave as soon as you’re finished.” I nodded.
“Okay.” I made small talk with the rest of the guys until they went up on stage. I sang along to their songs until the familiar guitar of Remembering Sunday started playing. I was handed a mic but was told not to go out on stage yet.
“As you can tell we are going to start Remembering Sunday but I have a very special guest to sing with me today. You won’t know who she is until her part comes up but you will all love her.”
Alex fell silent until he began to sing.
He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes
Started making his way past 2 in the morning
He hasn't been sober for days

Leaning now into the breeze
Remembering Sunday, he falls to his knees
They had breakfast together
But two eggs don't last
Like the feeling of what he needs

Now this place seems familiar to him
She pulled on his hand with a devilish grin
She led him upstairs, she led him upstairs
Left him dying to get in

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother,
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy, it seems
I'm going to ask her to marry me

Even though she doesn't believe in love,
He's determined to call her bluff
Who could deny these butterflies?
They're filling his gut

Waking the neighbors, unfamiliar faces
He pleads though he tries
But he's only denied
Now he's dying to get inside

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother,
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy, it seems
I'm going to ask her to marry me

The neighbors said she moved away
Funny how it rained all day
I didn't think much of it then
But it's starting to all make sense
Oh, I can see now that all of these clouds
Are following me in my desperate endeavor
To find my whoever, wherever she may be
He motioned for me to come out and I raised the mic to my lips and the words came out at the correct time.
I'm not coming back (forgive me)
I've done something so terrible
I'm terrified to speak (I'm not calling, I'm not calling)
But you'd expect that from me
I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt, now the rain is just (You're driving me crazy, I'm)
Washing you out of my hair and out of my mind
Keeping an eye on the world,
From so many thousands of feet off the ground, I'm over you now
I'm at home in the clouds, and towering over your head
Alex began to sing again but he held on to my arm keeping me out on stage. I stood there till the song was finished.
Well I guess I'll go home now...
I guess I'll go home now...
I guess I'll go home now...
I guess I'll go home
“Give it up for Ariana Carlile! She’s my best friend and has the voice of an angel.” He smiled at me before hugging me. I waved at the crowd and the rest of the band before making my way off stage. Just as promised Austin was there with the rest of the band and Andy. “I swear one day you will be famous Aribear.” I just shook my head at him.
That night I was lying in my bunk looking through Tumblr and Instagram seeing pictures of me. Honestly it was really weird. Some comments weren’t nice but others were sweet. I didn’t let it get to me though. I was about to lock it and go to sleep but a text stopped me in doing so.
Hey babe there will be a cab at warped tomorrow just for you at ten. Don’t tell anyone you are leaving. You won’t be coming back. If you don’t come, I will take away the people you love one by one starting with your precious brother. See you soon. xx
I placed my hand over my mouth so I didn’t scream. I had to go… I quietly got out of my bunk and began shoving all my belongings into my suitcase quickly. I took out clothes for tomorrow. I placed my suitcase in my bunk so no one would see it. I tiptoed my way to the table in the main area of the bus clutching a notebook. I sat down and began writing letters to each of the guys. I knew I would not see them in a very long time maybe I would never see them again. I silently cried as the pen scratched the paper. I had to go because if I didn’t everyone I loved would be in danger.

Notes

Ari's outfit: http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=113795805

I'm so so sorry for not posting for the past few weeks ...
I couldn't write for personal reasons but i will try to get back on schedule C:
I hope you enjoy this chapter!
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