I spent most of my time today getting high and staring at walls (again.) until Nick showed up and he said he was scared. I didn't really understand why he was scared of this place. I know it's big and it's a new surrounding but, there isn't much to be afraid of. Since we're safe from everything... Except from ourselves. And I think maybe he's scared of himself, not the building. Anyway, he invited me to his room and I went.

He's a small guy and has a serious eating problem. This place is cold so I offered to hug him when he started shivering in an attempt at warming him up and we watched TV - up until there was a storm out of nowhere and it fucked with the TV and made the electricity go. I panicked, since I'm afraid of the dark. (laugh all you want, I don't care) and he was afraid because of the storm. It ended up with him hanging from around my neck and sat between my legs. He also called me pretty and made me blush. Nobodies ever called me pretty before. And I never really blush. So thanks for that, Nick.

I'm working on being nicer to people. (as you can tell.) And, it's not that difficult. Apart from when Nick told me he's rooming with Ronnie and then I really just couldn't keep my mouth shut. The guys a prick and I really just don't like him. At all. Ronnie is also dating Oliver and I don't think people like that. (I know I don't I mean, he's dank as fuck.) but hey, if they love eachother then good for them.

I still haven't spoken to any of the others - Danny, Ben, Sarah and Oliver. (I'm probably forgetting one other person but, oh well.) I tried speaking to Tay, that didn't go down so well, though since she didn't really seemed like she wanted me to speak to her but, whatever. I tried and that's what counts, right?

My angel came to my room tonight, too. (Yes, he's my angel. Since he makes me feel things that I've never really felt before. And I've yet to figure out what these feelings actually mean. But, they're not important right now. I just want to enjoy him.) I haven't really been myself at all today and I really just wanted to cuddle. I held my arms out wide to pull him in for a hug and we cuddled on the bed, wrapped up in the blankets. And fuck, I don't think I've ever felt so... Good. I loved being close to him in a non sexual manner. That sounds weird, doesn't it? Oops.

Anyway, I figured out that his innocence is actually a big turn on. Like, it really drives me crazy. I make sexual comments and he just doesn't have any idea that I'm referring to fucking him and he blushes and it's so sweet. Aw. One thing led to another and we fucked. This time he fucked me and he was super nervous. But, so good. I've never had sex like this. It started out slow with him telling me he 'can't' because he was 'afraid' which only turned me on even more and I told him "do what you think is right and I'll tell you if it isn't." Maybe that calmed him down a bit, at least for a short time until I bit my lip causing it to bleed when he went down on me. Which panicked him and he just froze up with his mouth around my dick. He brushed his thumb across my lip and I kissed him hard, letting him know that I really was okay. He replaced his mouth with his hand and we continued the kiss, which was deep and warm and.. Hard. He pushed into me slowly and I moaned out loudly, which startled him, too because he froze up for a few seconds. I let him know everything was okay and he continued thrusting himself against me pushed harder and moving his hand faster.

After a while I asked him to go faster and he did. Really. It wasn't long before I told him I was close and shot my load into his hand after he shot his into my ass. After that I held him close to me and kissed his head as he kissed over my chest and asked me "was that okay?" in which I replied with "it was perfect." which resulted in him blushing and hiding his face in my chest. Another cute thing.

I asked him to stay the night and he said he would. So far this is the best day I've had since I've been here. (which is only two days but whatever.)

Going now, byeeeeeeee.
<3