One Moment

I felt like I had been hit with a bull douser, waking up. That or there is an earthquake going on in my head. My whole body ached with a soreness, my muscles being tense. And a ring echoed in my mind, swimming around in my ears.

What the hell happened?

With a groan of pain, the prominent throbbing pumping in my skull making me feel dizzy, I tried lifting up my hand to rest on my head, but I found my fingers heavy and wrapped in some cords. Curious, I tried opening my eyes slowly, they felt like they had been glued shut.
My vision was a little blurry as I squinted, letting my eyes adjust to the bright white light. Where the hell am I?

I looked down to my hand, seeing a small clamp on my pointer finger, a tube that I followed up to the crevasse of my arm, seeing it was an IV. An IV?
I looked up, frantic, seeing that I wasn't in my bus. No where near it, actually. I'm in the fucking hospital? What the hell?

"Hazel?"

Turning my head fast to the side, making myself a little dizzy, I saw Sammy. His figure was blurry for a moment, but I let my vision adjust. "Sam-" My throat felt like it was as dry as a fucking desert, making me cough before I couldn't finish my crack of a word.

"Here," Sammy reached to a table next to me, grabbing a cup of water. He led it to my mouth and helped me drink it. I downed it all in one drink, just now realizing how thirsty I was.

"What the hell happened, Sammy?" My voice cracked.

He sighed, "you got drank a lot last night, Haze."

I tried to rack my brain for everything that happened, but the last thing I remember is finding out about Texas. Fuck, just the thought of it had my heart freaking out, mind and stomach swirling around. No wonder I started drinking so much.

"Then you snuck out of the bus to drink more, nearly gave us heart attacks," he chuckled weakly. It obviously wasn't funny at the time.

I breathed deeply, regretting what I don't even remember. I don't even want to know how much stress I caused them or how I freaked them out. I was being so stupid and selfish, my god.. "So they pumped my stomach or something?" I asked. This has happened before, multiple times. Once when I was still with Mark, after he had had his way with me. Another was when I got out of the hospital after the incident with him and my brother. All I did was drink.

"Not exactly..." Sammy mumbled. I furrowed my eyebrows at him as I noticed the odd look on his face. "...What?" I asked, wondering what was wrong.

Before Sammy could say anything else, the door to the hospital room opened, Austin and Alan walking in, holding muffins in their hands. They looked surprised to see me up, Austin stopping in his tracks when he met my eyes. I swallowed deeply, all of the sudden nervous. Would Austin be mad? I'd be mad.. I mean fuck I probably stressed him out to no end. And with his heart..

"Uh Alan, want to come with me to go see what they've got in the cafeteria?" Sammy asked a little awkwardly.

"Yeah.. S-Sure," Alan looked down at his muffin, most likely having just been there, but playing along with Sammy. "Glad to see you're okay, Haze," Alan gave me a small smile which I returned before they walked out, leaving Austin and I.

He was still standing in the same spot, studying me, so I did the same to him. He was wearing the same thing I had last seen him in, but his face looked a little different. He had some bags under his eyes that looked to be a little puffy, almost as if he was crying?

"Hey.." I mumbled, trying to break the silence.

He cleared his throat and moved, setting down what he had in his hands down on the table next to me before sitting in a chair that was placed by my head. "How are you feeling?" He asked, barely looking at me.

"Like shit," I tried to give a laugh, but it just came out as a dead, dry chuckle.

He nodded without saying anything, just rested his elbows on my bed and looked down at the blankets. "You have every right to be mad.. I was stupid and selfish," I whispered, shaking my head in disgust at myself after a moment of silence.

"I'm not mad," Austin said, his voice barely above a whisper.

"You're not..?" I asked, skeptically, not fully understanding.

"I was just worried.." Austin finally looked up at me, his big brown eyes shining. "When we found you, you passed out and we got you here as fast as we could, not knowing if you had alcohol poisoning or something.." He started. "They were going to pump your stomach.. but they couldn't.."

Why is this a reason for him not to be pissed? Why didn't they pump my stomach? "I don't understand..." I mumbled.

"We didn't know how good you were going to do with out getting pumped, but.." He bit his lip as he let his head bow down, hands reaching up to grab mine. It felt so good to feel his warm, soft skin on mine again, but I turned my confused gaze from our hands back to him when he looked back up to me. His fingers brushed the top of my hand as he spoke. "You're pregnant, Haze.."

For the second time today I felt like another bull douser had drove up and ran me over. His words sunk into my head like I had just been injected with drugs, and in that one moment my world slowed and started rotating another way. But I was in denial. I didn't hear him right.. I couldn't have. "..W-What?" I stammered.

"You're having a baby.. We're having a baby.." He looked happy about it, almost seeming like he wanted to smile.

"No, that's not possible," I shook my head.

"It's very possible, Haze."

"N-No," my brain was bouncing around in my head, making me dizzy.

"The doctor said the pill never gives 100% complete protection.."

"No-"

"One in a hundred people on the pill get pregnant.." He cut me off lightly, trying to get me to see I can't deny this. What are the chances of me being that one out of a hundred?

"N-No," my lip quivered and all of the sudden tears were freely running down my face. How is this happening?

"Haze.. Shh, it's okay," Austin shifted so he was closer to me, wrapping me up in a hug when I started to break down. "You're okay.."

I cried and cried into him for a while while he lightly rocked me. I couldn't grasp onto the idea of what Austin just said, it all came at me so fast.. All of the sudden I wake up in a hospital without a clue on whats happened and then all of the sudden I'm pregnant?

"I-I'm not ready for this, Austin.." I cried into him. My brain felt like it was going to explode from the overload of what he just told me. Pregnant. I'm having a baby. A little baby. It's actually happening. There is a person inside of me. I'm going to be a mom.. And Austin's going to be a dad...

"It's going to be okay," he leaned back, brushing his thumbs under my eyes to wipe away the tears.

"How can you know that?" I cried out.

"Because I do, Hazel," Austin said seriously.

"But how?!" I croaked.

"I was up all night thinking about this," he made me look at him. "Sure, yeah at first I was scared as hell, freaking out.. But I've always wanted kids, a hundred of them!" He chuckled. "It may not be the best time in our lives right now, but I realized something... This is what I've always dreamed of.. A girl I love and a little baby to raise and start a family with... We can do this," he was still stroking my face, looking at me in the eyes with sincerity and love. It made my heart melt and I started to cry harder.

"I don't know if I can do this, Austin," I cried, trying to cover my face, but he wouldn't let me. Instead he moved so he could look me dead in the eyes and I couldn't look anywhere else but his.

"Of course you can. You are the strongest person I've ever met, Hazel Hendrix," he said sternly. What he said made me want to smile, but then I plagued my mind with more thoughts.

"B-But what if... I already nearly drank myself to death, what if I hurt the baby? W-What if I'm not a good mom? How.. How do I do this? I can't... I don't know how.." I sobbed, frantically going on and on.

"You're going to be a great mom, Hazel. I know it," Austin didn't hesitate to respond. "And we'll figure this out. Step by step and day by day, together."

We just held each others gaze for a moment, eyes holding everything. Just a look from Austin gave me so much reassurance and hope that I didn't know what else to do. He made everything seem okay.

I let myself slowly try to calm down, and when I did, I lifted my shaky hand up, moving it down to my stomach. I lightly placed it down, having a hard time grasping that I had a baby in there.. My baby. It was so odd.

A small smile lit up Austin's face and he moved his hand to rest on top of mine. We both kept our hands there as we looked back to each other. Austin's eyes were bright and happy which was hard to not smile at, even though I have no idea what I'm feeling.

Austin leaned down and kissed my forehead, letting his lips linger sweetly until someone clearing their throat caught our attention. We both looked over to see a man dressed in a white coat with a folder standing by my bed, the doctor. "Sorry to interrupt, just came to see how Hazel was," he gave a small smile as he walked to the side of my bed, lifting up a clip board that was hanging off of it.

"I'm okay," I gave a weak smile back, holding onto Austin's hand while I watched the doctor flip through papers.

"I see you've found out about the pregnancy," he raised an eyebrow at me.

"Uh, yeah, I have," a million questions flooded my head.

"Good. My name is Jeffrey Dahmer, you can call me doctor Jeff," he stated. "And I'm sure you must have a lot of questions," he read my mind.

Austin and I both just nodded.

"Well, when we discovered you were pregnant we ran some tests and found out that you are about four or five weeks along.."

"Four weeks?" I breathed, exasperated. How the fuck have I been pregnant for a month without noticing?! The damage I could have done..

"Yes, most patients who have surprise pregnancies like this while on the pill seem to have skipped the beginning symptoms of a normal pregnancy. I had a woman once who was 12 weeks along with out even knowing.." He recalled.

I ran a hand over my face, holding it there while I breathed in and out deeply. Austin soothingly rubbed his fingers on the top of my hand again. "Is the baby healthy?" Austin asked.

The doctor sighed, "yes, as far as I can tell, nothing seems to be wrong. But I would not advise touching another drink again during you pregnancy. You're lucky your boyfriend got you here in time last night.."

I nodded, there's no way in hell I'd take a drink now. I'm not that stupid. Just stupid enough to fuck myself up, but never intentionally someone else. I am taking care of another person now. Holy fuck, this is a lot to handle..

"And sir, you mentioned to me earlier you two were on a tour for your bands?" The doctor brought up.

"Yes, that's right.." Austin said. "We've only got a little over a month left."

"Then that shouldn't be too much to sit out, right?"

"What?!" I was now sitting up, my head spinning as I did. "You mean not perform?.."

"Yes. You need to relax, which means no excessive work outs like jumping and running all over the stage for hours," the doctor told me.

"But-But... I," I didn't have an excuse or reason to give him, it just hurt to hear that I couldn't perform. Music is like a part of me that I can barely go a day without and knowing that I can't live it or perform for my fans.. How can i just cancel all of them?

"I'm very sorry, but it will all be worth it," he gave me a smile.

I looked back down to my stomach, this time placing both hands on it. I would have to give up a lot of things, but am I ready to do that? Give up performing, for now, and give up my freedom as a young adult that parties and fucks shit up.. I'm going to have to settle down. Everything will change... Who knows what will happen to me and Austin or my band..

But as I looked down to my stomach my heart was taken over by a large sense of love for the little baby inside of me.

Notes

i'm pretty sure the 1 in 100 thing was true but I do know people can actually skip over the beginning symptoms of pregnancy, i had an Aunt who had a similar thing happen to her!

What do you guys think?! Please please please let me know so I can know if I'm doing okay!!