I Can't Heal The Way I Feel About You

"Austin..," my voice was shaky. "I need you to come with me to the hospital...to get an abortion."
"Is everything okay, Charlotte? What about Oli?" Austin seemed genuinely concerned.
"I just feel so awful aborting out baby. I don't want him to have to sit through it. The only thing is...he's skeptical that this is your kid. You and I both know that it isn't and couldn't possibly be. He just still doesn't trust you."
"Well, Oli is just gonna have to suck it up because if you want me to take you to the hospital, I will. I am here for you 100 percent." I could tell Austin was smiling.
"Thank you so much. You're the best friend I could ever ask for."

I hung up the phone and turned over in bed to look at Oli. He looked hurt.
"Baby, what's wrong?" I placed a hand on his shoulder, but he just turned over.
"Tell me the truth...why you don't want me there...why you want Austin there and not me."
"Oliver, I told you the truth. That is the whole truth. I have no feelings for Austin. I never did anything with him. This is already hard enough on me aborting our baby. I don't want you to have to suffer through it too." I kissed his shoulder and then his neck.
"But I want to be there, Charlotte. I want to be there for you. I care about you. I don't want you to feel alone." He turned back over to look at me, and I could tell that he was serious.
"Are you sure? I don't want you to be hurt by all of this."
"Yes, I'm sure. Austin can be there too if you still want him, but I really want to be there. I have to be there. You're my girl." He kissed my nose and wrapped his arm around my waist.
"Okay. Thank you for doing this. I love you so much, you know that?"
"Yes. I love you too. We'll go first thing tomorrow morning to talk to the doctor about when we can schedule a procedure."

****

The next morning, I found myself sitting in the waiting room at the hospital between two lovely tattooed men, one of them Austin, one of them Oli. My hands were shaking, and I could feel the cold sweat on the back of my neck. I was praying that I wouldn't get a panic attack. I couldn't that day. I just couldn't.

"Charlotte?" A nurse poked her head out from behind the door by the front desk.
"Yes, that's me. Can my boyfriend come and my friend come with me?"
"We're gonna ask some confidential questions first, but we'll bring them in afterwards."
I smiled back at Austin and Oli and mouthed I love you to Oli before following the nurse through the door.

---Oli's Point of View---

"So uh, are you nervous...yanno about Charlotte?" Austin looked over me.
"Yeah, I am. I know she can make it through this though. She's tough." I went back to staring at the floor.
"Are you upset that she's not keeping the baby?" Austin pressed.
"For fuck sake, are you gonna keep asking me questions? This is a really hard time. Not that you'd understand." I knew if he kept talking that I would really lose it, so I tried to shut him up quick.
"Jeez, I was just trying to make small talk. I'm worried about her too. I care about her too. It's not all about you, man. I'm her friend." Austin seemed irritated now.
"Well, I'm her boyfriend, and I love her more than you ever will. I honestly don't need you here today to cause more drama, but Charlotte wanted you here, and I wasn't about to say no. Just keep your mouth shut, and we can try to get through this painlessly.
"Is this about the incidents? Are you still upset about that? Dude, I love her, but she's all your's. She's never gonna have feelings for me, and it's not my right to take her away from you. Stop being so goddamn passive aggressive with me every time we see each other. I'm sorry. I've said I'm sorry a thousand times. We are just friends." Austin let out a long sigh after his little speech.

I looked at him, outraged that he decided to even bring up the subject.
"But think about it...if you knew it wouldn't hurt her to take her away from me...would you do it? Huh?" I bit my tongue to stop myself from shouting out a list of expletives and waited for Austin's reply.
"No, man. I wouldn't. You're my friend. I don't want to hurt you either. I've already hurt you plenty. I don't want to screw up this friendship anymore than I already have."

Just then, the nurse came out.
"We're ready for you, Mr. Sykes and..."
"Austin. Austin Carlile."
"Yes, Mr. Carlile. Both of you may see Charlotte now."

---Charlotte's Point of View---

I was still pretty nervous when the nurse let Austin and Oli into the room. I knew the worst part of the appointment was over. I had both my best friends back with me.
"So, it appears that your girlfriend is only about 4 weeks pregnant, meaning that we can't perform the abortion for another 4 weeks. It's safer between 8 and 12 weeks. So, we'll schedule an appointment whenever it is most convenient for you. If Charlotte wants, both of you can come back with her. We suggest at least one person is present for support." The nurse spoke mostly to Oli, which seemed to bother Austin a bit.
"Okay, thank you very much. We'll make an appointment and see you back here in 4 weeks."

After Oli had scheduled the appointment, we were walking back to the car when Oli pulled me aside.
"I need to talk to you when we get home. It's important."
"Okay." I became worried again when he said that.

Notes

Wow it's been awhile. I am so sorry. Things have been very busy here. I'm planning on writing another chapter tonight, and then I'll try to get another couple up this week.

Always open to suggestions