I sat down with Oli in the kitchen area of the bus. He looked at me intently, and I just started at my feet.
"Oli, Austin...Austin kissed me. IT meant nothing to me. I swear. I just thought you should know."
"Austin did what?! I swear to fucking God I'm gonna screw him up." Oli went to get up, but I grabbed his wrist, and he sat back down.
"We were just sitting and talking and he did it. I pushed him off and told I was upset. He apologized. I just wasn't expecting it."
"Well, how do you feel about him? Do you have feelings for him?"
This was the exact kind of question I didn't want Oli to ask me. I loved him and didn't want to hurt him. Besides, what I felt for Austin was hardly anything at all compared to what I had with Oli. He continued to look at me, disbelieve appearing in his expression.
"You do, don't you? I should have known. I can't believe I trusted you! You're just another fangirl out to shag every band member possible!"
"No, Oli! That's not how it is. I just think he's sweet. The slight feelings I may have are nothing compared to what I feel for you. I love you." I tried to put my hand on his, but he jerked his away.
"Just get out. Go tour with Austin or something. I can't have you here at the moment. I need to think this all over."

I stormed out of the bus, pushing past the rest of the band as I did who were about to enter the bus. I went to the only place I could think of. Austin's bus. I had no one else here I could talk to. As much as I didn't want to see Austin, it was my only choice. I entered the bus without knocking and sat down on one of the bunks and began to cry. I can't believe a stupid high school crush that maybe still remained was tearing Oli and I apart. And there was nothing I could do about it. He was too angry.

I heard a rustling of sheets and looked over to see Austin in the top bunk across from me.
"Are you okay? I'm guessing Oli is upset."
"Yeah, thanks a whole fucking lot. You screwed shit up, Austin. You really did."
He looked down, guilt in his eyes.
"I'll apologize to Oli if that's what it takes. I didn't mean to hurt you or him. I'll help him with Drop Dead; I'll do whatever he wants. I just want you to be happy. I'm sorry. That was unfair of me." He hopped down from the bunk and folded me into his arms.
"It's going to be okay. Don't worry. I'll fix it all. I promise."
I cried into his shirt, the shakes between outburst racking my body. I couldn't stop. I had just messed up the best thing that had ever happened to me.

"We'll go right now. We'll go and talk to him, okay? Come on." Austin grabbed my hand, not in a romantic way, just comforting. I was still crying pretty hard, and Austin put an arm around me. We walked slowly so that I could calm down before we got back to the Bring Me The Horizon bus. It was getting dark, and I tripped a few times, but Austin kept me up. When we got to the bus we saw empty beer cans and an empty bottle of vodka littered outside of the bus.
"Oh, jeez. This is gonna be rough." Austin squeezed my shoulder.

We walked onto the bus, and immediately something felt wrong.
"Oli? Oli, where are you? Austin is here to talk to you."
I walked cautiously further into the bus. I saw empty pill bottles on the counter and started to panic. I knew Oli had previously had a drug problem. I didn't know he still carried pills on him.
"Oli, please answer me! You're scaring me!"
Austin and I ran back to where the bunks were located. Oli was laying on his back on one of the bottom bunks, mouth open, pills strewn on his pillow.
"Oli, shit, Oli get up please!" I shook his shoulders, and Austin brought in a glass of water that he poured down the back of Oli's neck. Nothing happened. Oli didn't move at all.
"Austin," I said calmly. "Call 911. Now."
Austin fumbled with his phone for a second and then dialed the number.

Notes

:(
sorry I havent been able to write much. school just started