The sky is so tragically beautiful. A graveyard of stars.

Once I found a suitable parking space which was surprisingly easier than I thought it would have been I grabbed my bag and shyly began walking towards where the guys were standing. “Hey” Austin shouts over what I assume was sound-check for whom ever was opening. In response to Austin I smile the most genuine smile I could possibly muster up and wave over to him and when I finally reach where he is standing he pulls me in for a hug which slightly causes me to wince in pain but I don’t think he noticed. After Austin releases me from his grip Alan pulls me in for a hug and says hey and Phil follows with the same greeting. When the greetings are done exchanging Austin leads me hand in hand to their bus and the others follow. When we reach the door of the bus I can see a few other figures sitting in the “living room” area of the bus. After walking in I can later make out Tony and Arron and I am assuming the girl sitting next to them were their girlfriends. “Hey Alex right?” Tony asks while playing with the girl sitting next to him. “Yeah, hi” I say while accidently backing up into Austin which causes me to blush twenty shades of red, “Sorry” I shrink down and try to reduce me size to a pea so I become invisible to the embarrassment. “It’s all good” he chuckles. “Anyways, Alex this is Maria, Tinos’ girlfriend and Amanda Aaron’s girlfriend” Austin explains while gently pointing to each girl. “Hey guys” I say trying to make sure the words don’t get suck in my throat. “Now that the awkward introductions are over… we should probably head in a do sound-check you guys” Alan exclaims.
As if on cue Tino, Maria, Amanda and Aaron stand up and we all walk over into the venue. Inside the venue everything looks so different from yesterday, there is a lighting system situated in the middle of the “pit” or floor the bar is fully stalked with all sorts of liquor and beer and the stage is set up with Tino’s drum kit and the backdrop is positioned directly behind the kit. The whole sight was memorizing. Still in the group we all walking up a few stairs into the backstage area where people are running all over the place trying to set up for tonight and to left of us is a long hallway full of rooms which I expect to be the greenrooms. Most of the rooms we pass have different banners on them, one says “Issues” who is one of the opening bands, another says “Tonight alive” also an opening band, and then the next room says “Of Mice & Men”. Inside the room there is a long table full of food, water and other assorted drinks which include some liquor, along with that there is a long couch that covers the entire length of the side wall and a TV in the corner of the wall that also has the door on it. Oddly enough, the room was a lot bigger than I had expected. Everyone shuffles in and takes a seat, well some of the guys get food of course but I just sit down on the edge of the couch being careful to not take up to much room or to be in anyone’s way. Turning around Alan has a plate full of pasta which does not surprise me at all and sits directly in the middle of the couch obviously not caring about leaving space for others. Tino is next but this time he is carrying two plates, one for him and the other for Maria. Austin follows with a plate that only has a few vegetables and two apples, sitting down next to me her turns towards me “Do you want any food?” he looks concerned. “No thank you, I ate before I left the house” but almost instantly after my response I could feel my face drop, why did I have to lie to him about not being hungry? I mean I knew that I was since it has been at least three days since I had eaten anything that contained two hundred calories.
*Flash Back*
It was the first day of freshamn year, I had just gotten home from what was quite posible the worst day at school I had to date. But what I came home too was much worse compared to what I had just put up with at school. I had come home to my dad passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack in his hand and my mom upstairs crying. As I walk into the house I accidently let the door slam shut from the wind which causes my dad to awaken and in his drunked rage he screams “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU FAT ASS, CAN’T YOU SEE THAT I AM TRYING TO SLEEP HERE?” That, that was the moment when my obsession with my weight began. The words fat ass rang in my head almost as if it was on a never ending loop.
*End of Flashback*
I don’t know how but Austin managed to catch on to the fact that I got distracted and seemed distant. “Hey where did you go there?” His face softens and brings me back to the room. “Sorry, I was just thinking about something from when I was younger.” I try to flash a smile so her doesn’t ask what is was about because to be honest, I don’t think I could handle telling him, he already thinks I am damaged as it is so there is no point in making it worse. Thankfully he just lets it go and we just sit there making small talk which is exactly what I need right now.
About twenty minutes later everyone had eaten and the guys just got up to show us to the stage. When we arrive we can see the crowd of people from the side of the stage, the show must have been sold out because I have never seen so many people in this venue. As the lights come down the Tino and Aaron kiss their girls friends and start jumping up and down to get their energy pumped up. Then the lights lower even more and Tino runs out to his drum set and Aaron, Alan and Phil run out to the stage which just leaves Austin and I. But what happened next is something I never expected, before Austin ran up onto the stage he turns towards me and says “Hey, after the show will you stick around? I want to talk to you.” In complete and utter shock I smile and nod my head and then he is gone.
Watching him on stage from this point of view is breath taking and I never realized how much emotion Austin put into the words he screams. It is as if I am watching him display all of his frustrations and emotions in front of the crowd and watching this makes me want to cry but I pull myself together and just watch the amazing show. From this position I can see all of the crowd and for the first time I can see how much the band means to so many people. I also never realized how many people love to crowd surf and what a moshpit actually looked like to the band, I only ever got to experience this from the crowd and everything looks different from down there because you are more concerned with not getting kicked in the face by a crowd surfer.
The set last around an hour and by the time the guys come off the stage they are all full of sweat and are out of but it makes Austin even hotter, granted I would never admit that outlout but it is still true. As he walks off he grabs my hand and pulls me in for a hug, he smells of sweat and musky like a body spray or something but I don’t mind at all, in fact it is very comforting. The hug pulls me into his chest since he is so much taller than I am but it causes me to smile like a little girl on Christmas morning. Once the embrace is pulled away he still has my hand and leads me outside of the venue to get away from everyone so we can talk. The outside air is crisp and cold and by this time it is pitch black with the sky only being lit up by the moon. The air is so cold that you can see the steam coming off of Austins body and both of our breathes much neither one of us mind. “I had an amazing time tonight Alex, today is one of the best days I have ever had and I loved getting to know you” Austin’s face lights up more than it has during the time we have been together but he also looks sad and I know why. “I coud say the same about you, hell you have made me feel more important than I ever have before and you showed me so much of your world. I loved the past two days and it has made me much happier than I have felt in a very long time.” I proclaim as I also begin to feel sad because I know what is coming next. “I know you know what is coming next, but we are leaving tonight for the next show however I don’t want to leave you. Alex, I have a question for you…” “Shoot” I say behind teary eyes and a smile. “Alex, I have loved hanging out with you and I really want to get to know you more so would you be willing to hangout again sometime soon?” “Well dah” I respond whilst half in shock and sticking my toung out to lighten the mood. And just like that Austin pulls me into another hug and slides his hands down to the small of my back, pushing me into his body even more and the he pulls away. Placing his hands on my cheek and the other around my side, he pulls me in and kisses me softly but also passionitly. This takes me by surprise but I kiss back. I think I am falling in love with him…

Notes