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From Light Unto Darkness

And I Was On My Own Today

I was on my own today.

Nicco was back at the barn, fifty miles away. I couldn’t go to him for help. My stomach was nervous, causing little butterflies to spiral into my throat.

I was not nervous about the act of killing.

In fact, I was never more anxious to kill in my life.

Whenever I used to read my books, I would dream about taking out the bad guys. I would be an assassin, a shadow hunter, or a spy that was going around, sneaking behind corners and taking out the bad guys with ease.

Now, I was living what I had only imagined and read about. I was about to kill for the first time.

And…I was excited.

I was excited to put a bullet through Austin’s head.

Or slaughter him in a net trap.

Or release a vial of poison into his water.

Or launch an arrow into his heart.

I had brought the poison, the bow, the pistol. I was ready. I was ready for anything. I even brought my steel enforced net and darts to knock out any possible witnesses.

I was excited to see Austin for once.

I was excited to see him bleed to death on the floor.

I was excited to get my mother back, to learn what had happened to her.

I was excited to have closure.

I was excited for the night.

I had been taught not to fear. When there is fear, there is distraction. When there is distraction, there is death, and it’s never your enemies. It’s you. You’ll be the one dead on the floor. And Nicco says that’s not good.

The Grey Men are fast. Nicco told me that Austin is faster.

I have to take him out quickly.

The car radio dimmed as I turned it down. The fading lights of the sunset disappearing behind the horizon caused the sky to blush merrily. I was at the destined location, a concert venue with an unknown name in a town too small to care about.

I straightened out my shirt, a nice little blue top that looked well with my cropped jeans. I looked innocent with emerald green eyes that danced like a little girl in a candy shop. But underneath the clothes, I had a belt with my nessacary tools I would need for a quick getaway or a quick execution.

My plan was to get into the back parts of the venue. Once I was backstage, I would find out Austin and the band’s schedule, and plan ahead. I was good at quickly planning ahead.

Looking into my pouch before getting out of the car, I saw the bottle of heroine. If I needed to, I could poison him with my purple bottle and then inject heroine into his bloodstream after he was dead, making it look like he had died of an overdose.

Oh man, his fans would be sad to ‘learn he was an addict and died of an OD’…

Getting all my stuff, I ruffled my shirt around the pouch, making it easily disguised. I took sure steps approaching the gate. The guard let me in after I flashed him a wink and affirmed that I was on the guest list.

Getting in was easy, and finding Austin was a little more difficult. I had seen plenty of pictures of him and knew what he looked like, but I just had to search him out.

Backstage was a bit of a mess. The band had just finished their concert and were possible meeting fans, an inopportune time to assassinate my mother’s kidnapper.

“Excuse me?” I asked a security guard after twenty minutes of searching. The buff man eyed me.

“Yeah?”

“Do you know where Austin Carlile is? I need to get an interview with him, but I cannot seem to find him.” I cried out in desperation. The brunette security guard thought for a moment, squinting his eyes in pondering quietness.

“Oh, I think I heard their guitar tech say the boys were heading to the bar across the street. I’m sure you could catch up with them there!” He offered. I thought about it, remember the bar just across the street.

I walked off, thanking the guard for the help. Well, this had been a waste of time!

Leaving the venue, I easily spotted the bar. It was called Wanderer’s Taphouse. The place seemed somewhat busy, but I’m sure that I could drug the man and get him out back to make a quick execution.

Another deep breath and another. I couldn’t help but calm my frazzled nerves. My steps remained calm, but my heart was racing. Could I do this right?

As I stepped inside, the bar was really busy. There were tables scattered all over the place and a dance floor in the middle. It looks like all the security guards, techs, stage-hands, and the band had been packed in here for a little celebration. People crowded on the dance floor as a song picked up the pace.

Making my way to the bar, I sat at a stool, the bartender eyeing me, a silent question of was I legally allowed to drink? He shook his head. I was too obviously seventeen. Besides, I didn’t want a shot right now. I needed a clear mind to be able to kill.

Distraction means death.

“Hey, is this seat open?” Someone asked. I whirled around, nearly jumping out of my chair.

Austin Carlile looked hopeful as he held a beer in one hand and pointed to the seat on my right with the other. I nodded.

“Sure. Sit down.”

The tall, tattooed man plopped down at the counter, folding his arms just like Nicco does when he’s sitting at this desk, thinking.

Nicco does a lot of thinking.

Austin’s brilliant brown eyes fell on me, I raised an eyebrow and challenged him to talk first.

“So did you attend the concert?” He asked me, hopefulness and niceties clouding his voice. No, he wasn’t drunk. He had barely touched the beer in front of him.

“Yeah, it was amazing! Loved the entire set, to be honest. You chose some amazing songs out of your discography to play tonight.” I said, shrugging.

When pretending like you did something or you know about something, you don’t give specifics, just be slightly vague.

Nicco taught me that.

“Yeah, O.G. Loko pumped up the crowd, didn’t it? Were you in the wall of death?” He asked. I laughed and grinned.

This Grey Man is nice…too nice…

He’s open, not like what I had expected.

Nicco had prepared me for that. He said that he’s not a normal Grey. He acts different than most.

“Oh no, I’m not much one for a wall of death. But I did love O.G. Loko. It’s very…raw. Sex, lust, and pure need.” I grinned. Austin’s smile widened.

“I wrote that one with Alan. We don’t typically do a lot of really raw lusty songs, but that one’s a golden one.” Austin fiddled with the bottle before looking out at the dance floor. The song had changed. The DJ said they were slowing it down. I thought I saw the drummer slow dance with a girl amongst a few of the other couples. Many single people evacuated the scene.

“Don’t drink?” I asked. Austin shook his head.

“Heart problems. Marfans. Drinking slows down the heart too much, can’t risk dying from a Bud Light.” He sighed, pushing it away. I gave him a questioning look.

“Then why have it?”

“I don’t really know.” He admitted. “Look like one of the guys, I guess?” I shook my head and turned to the dance floor.

I needed to kill this man…but what was holding me back?

“Did you want a water or something?” I asked. Austin shook his head.

“Maybe after a dance. Speaking of which, would you like to dance with me?” He asked, his eyes tempting. My breath caught.

No one’s asked me to dance before.

I’ve never had a prom.

No one ever asked me to homecoming.

No one’s cared enough to dance with me.

Not even Nicco.

“S-sure.” I stuttered, my cheeks flushing. Austin held out his hand. I took it gingerly as he led me out of my seat and onto a fairly uncrowded area on the dance floor.

I let him take the lead, his hands on my hips, my arms around his neck. My heart beat faster and faster and faster and faster and faster.

andfasterandfasterand

fasterandfasterandfasterand

fasterandfasterandfasterand

fasterandfasterandfasterand

I thought I was going to explode, but once we really started to dance, I relaxed. Austin’s gaze held my eyes. He was so kind, to take a lonely girl at the bar who was supposed to kill him and dance with her.

He was taking someone he didn’t know and might never see again, but he danced with her and he talked to her and he made her feel good once again and not so singled out in the world and just a normal person.

And that girl was me and I felt alright for once.

I love Nicco. I really do. He is the sweetest man, but we are alone. I don’t go out except to selected places to go play Light and Darkness. I don’t go into town. He’s not happy when I sneak out onto the roof to see the stars. We are alone in that barn and I wanted out and I got it and I am happy.

And I was dancing with my mother’s kidnapper.

And I was supposed to kill him.

And my life was full of ‘and’. And this, and that, and everything else in the world.

What was I going to do?

I saw a red head boy in the corner snicker and wink at Austin, who just rolled his eyes and flipped him off. I chuckled, my breath forced. What was I going to do?

“My friend over there, Alan, was trying to get me to talk to you ever since you walked in the bar. I said that you looked lonely and Alan told me that I better get my ass over to you and start talking.” He leaned down, whispering in my ear. I laughed hopelessly.

“You’re too kind, Austin.”

“Thank you! You’re very kind as well.” He responded. It was his turn to blush.

We danced in time to a soothing song, our hips swaying to the beat. That was the wonderful part of dancing with a musician, was being able to both be in time.

“What’s your name? I never caught it.” Austin asked quietly.

“K-Kalista.” I stuttered, almost choking out my real name. Austin looked at me happily.

“That’s a very pretty name to match a pretty girl.”

I blushed a darker shade of red. Nicco was never this affectionate. He never gave out compliments like this.

I love Nicco with all my heart. I love him to death, but he never treats me like that. I guess I just am used to his quiet displays of affection.

“You’re a real charmer, Carlile.” I giggled as the song ended. His grin was infectious. His hands lingered on my hips a moment before taking a step back, really looking at him.

From what Nicco has told me, Grey Men aren’t like this. They stick to the shadows, not out on the dance floor for everyone to see. They are quiet, they are not this kind, and they don’t smile. They are cold hearted killers.

Austin was sweet, a smiley person who had an adorable habit of sticking his tongue out between his teeth whenever he got really happy. He was a genuine person.

This was no killer.

Austin couldn’t be a Grey. He just…wasn’t. There was no feeling of foreboding, of anger, of threat around him.

He was too kind, too pure…

I couldn’t kill him.

“Are you okay?” He asked, his face falling. He must’ve noticed me paling as I took another step back. I nodded, trying to smile but my lips were numb.

“Not really.” I mumbled before turning tail and running out of that place. I ducked under arms and around people before running out the door and going back to where my car was parked.

I had to be sure it wasn’t him that took my mother. I had to be sure that I was right, that he wasn’t a Grey.

The gates were closed, but I managed to hop the fence and approach the bus door. The lock was too easy to pick. No one was on the bus as I entered.

I ransacked their stuff, making sure to be careful to put it in the same place, but my nerves were even more frazzled than before.

No chains.

No whips.

No signs of vicious deeds.

No contracts exchanged.

No blood on the floor.

No sign of anything that would point to a Grey.

No girls.

They weren’t Grey Men. Nicco was wrong.

My vision was going blurry, my head hurt like hell, and I just needed to escape before being found. I ran out of the bus, barely getting the door shut behind me. Climbing the fence, I managed to stumble back to my car before locking myself in it and crying.

I was a step away from finding my mom again.

And Nicco would not be pleased.