100 Sleepless Nights

I couldn’t tell my mom why I got sent home, of course my shitty guidence teacher did though. And that was an awkward conversation to have. I don’t think I’ve ever had a worse one. I honestly don’t even think my mom has a brain since we moved here. She has became so distant. My father is rarely here. No one is safe in this house at all. Or maybe they just really don’t care. Regardless of that, I just can’t do this anymore. I’m probably gonna get arrested and charged with Kellins murder any day now, they can’t find any solid evidence that I didn’t do it so they have no choice.

For whatever reason, nothing seems right anymore. My head can’t make sense of life in general. I could have easily lived in a world where ghosts didn’t exist and I didn’t have a boyfriend who died, or a friend whom is a ghost and died like 15 years ago. It sounds crazy to me, maybe I am crazy?

“Why do I do the things I do?” I asked myself. The saddest part is I half expected a response. What a fool I am.

I climbed out of my bed and walked downstairs. This massive house is too beautiful for such a fucked up history. Why did this happen? Why has no one tried to work it out? Was it a curse? These are the things people should be asking, not trying to scare others and kill.

No one was at home, as per usual. I don’t even know where they go half of the time.
I decided to go over to Mikes’ house. His mom will probably flip out but I need to speak to him. I left the house and walked across the street. Luckily the cars weren’t there; indecating that Mike’s parents were out. I knocked on the door and waited. Nothing. I knocked again. Still nothing. Maybe he isn’t in then.

I walked back over to my house to find Vic sitting on my front steps. I sat down beside him and said nothing. “Why were you over at my house?” He asked.

“I wanted to speak to Mike” I mumbled. I pulled a packet of cigarettes out of my pocket and lit one up. I took a long drag and sighed. “I forgot how helpful this stuff is” I sighed. He rolled his eyes and looked away. “Why you so awkward about it, it’s not like it can kill you” I laughed.

“Good point, but it can kill you” He said taking the cigarette from my hand and stubbing it out.

“Hey!” I whined. He just shrugged at me. “You know I’m starting to think it might not be such a bad thing” I mumbled, standing up and storming back into my house.

He followed me in, closing the door behind him. “Well you basically did earlier” He said from
behind me. I ignored him and continued walking up the stairs to my room. “You know it’s rude to ignore people” He continued.

“You’re hardly a person anymore” I turned to him and sat on my bed, folding my arms across my chest.

“What the hell happened to you?” He asked, I could see the worry on his face.

I laughed, mainly because its insane that he could even ask that. “ I was a totally normal person before I came here, I was clueless and believed that people just died. But now I know better, we don’t get redemption. Well some don’t. You think You have an existance but really, you have hell. And you honestly ask what has happened to me?” I shook my head.

“You’re a joke, I’m crazy. You don’t exist at all. You’re not real” I laughed.

“If I wasn’t real I wouldn’t be able to do this...” He said, leaning in and kissing me softly. My breath caught in my throat and I was shocked. He pulled back and laughed. “Would I?” I just
blinked at him.

”Uh no I guess you wouldn’t…” I managed to say after a few seconds. He laughed, biting his lip softly. I frowned. This made things very different, what was that even supposed to mean?

My feelings for him had sure as hell not disappeared, and I knew he still felt something for me. But still. He was dead and I was alive. My head started spinning, I didn’t know what to do. This whole situation was so fucked up. I looked up in Vic’s eyes again, seeing the same confusion in his eyes, but there was something else in there as well. Determination. Do or die, even though it was hard for him to die all over… And then our lips met in another kiss. It wasn’t only him leaning forward, my lips longed after his just as much. The kiss itself was fierce. Like it actually was about life or death. Better than all of my kisses with Kellin. I tried not to think about that, because the thought of Kellin’s and mine relationship still made me feel a bit guilty.

This kiss was one of those where nothing else exists. The only thing I could think of was Vic’s lips against mine, him awkwardly trying to find a place to put his hands on my body and me, for once feeling a bit more in control after all the kisses with Kellin, leading his hands right, placing them on my hips. I wrapped my arms around his neck, not wanting to let him go. It didn’t take long until his tongue and mine were battling for dominance, both of us starting to get a little short of breath. Suddenly Vic got more in control, pulling me closer to his chest as he backed against the bed. With his lips still attached to mine, he turned us around, and realizing what he wanted to do, I jumped in the bed, lying down as he crawled in after me, leaning over me. Breaking the kiss, he got up on his knees, looking down on me.

“Don’t stop”, I said, not knowing what else to say. He smiled, awkwardly placing his hands on the sides of my shirt, trying to tug it off, but in the end I had to help him get it off, since his fingers kept getting stuck underneath my bra. Excited and nervous giggles were the only sounds audible, except for fabric pulled against skin. As soon as I had helped Vic get rid of his shirt, he couldn’t resist the temptation to kiss me again, and his naked skin against mine made me even more excited for what was about to happen. Apparently he felt the same way, because when he broke the kiss to take off his pants, there was a bulge that I hadn’t noticed before. The knowledge of knowing that Vic Fuentes got a boner just because of me… The only word to describe my feeling at that moment was simple: horny. I wanted Vic inside of me more than anything in my whole life; I wanted him to fuck me. There was something in his eyes that made me sure that similar thoughts were going on inside his head.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked as I moved his hands to the button of my jeans. He didn’t wait for my answer to unbutton it however, and my pants were down on the floor, joining his, when I opened my mouth.

“Never been more sure”, I said, moving my hands to his waist, pulling his boxers down. He smiled, a bit unsure, scared that I was going to change my mind. Instead of doing anything else, I pulled my panties down, letting him help me get it over your feet.

“Then lets do this”, he said, winking at me, leaning down to kiss me. I felt how he got closer to my entrance.

“Wait, Vic… Protection…?” I suddenly remembered all the advices I had got from older people every time the subject had come to sex. I didn’t want to get pregnant.

“No need. I’m a ghost, you know. You can’t get pregnant because of me”, he said, sounding very sure of himself. I nodded, that did make sense. He took that as consent for him to proceed, and started pressing his tip inside of me. It was a weird mix of feelings, and not quite like I had imagined it. Pleasure mixed with pain. I was thankful I already was wet enough so that he could glide in easy enough, because I felt how tight I was. Inch by inch he pressed himself inside me, having to pause at half his length because my eyes were tearing up.

“Are you ok?” he asked, concerned. I nodded again, thankful however that he had paused for a while, letting me adjust to his size. And after a while he could continue, actually managing to fill me up. Feeling him inside of me was amazing, and quite frankly I wouldn’t really need much more to actually come. It did hurt like hell, but it was also the best thing I have ever felt, and I could only imagine how it would feel once I was a bit more experienced.

Carefully, Vic started moving his hips, not really thrusting but still creating a lot of friction. I let out a small gasp, which he caught by kissing you. After a while I got more used to the friction and it didn’t hurt as much anymore, the pain was replaced by pure pleasure.

“Vic… oh fuck”, I managed to moan. He understood what was going on, and thrusted a bit harder than earlier. That was all it took to get off the edge, and it really was like flying. I felt how my walls were cramping around Vic’s dick and I heard him moan, feeling how he released deep inside of me before the pure amount of pleasure made me black out for a while.

Notes