(content warning: drug usage)

After everyone checked out of the hotel and we loaded up the buses, getting to the stage was easy. It was barely even ten minutes away from our hotel which was the perfect amount of time to call Syd. The thing is, she still wasn't answering. So it only took me a second to put together the pieces.

New college student... drinking.. hangover..

You get where this is going. She's most likely still passed out, which as much as it worries me, it still makes me glad she's having a good time and living her life. I just hope she doesn't get as out of control with alcohol like I had. I don't want her to ever go through what I had to.

But, hopefully she's just having a good time. And since I still have 5 minutes of the car ride to kill, I decided to call Dominic.

"Heeeey, Darlin'," he answered in a slur, but I'm almost positive he wasn't drunk too. It was more of a drawn out, boredom type of slur.

"Hey, how are you?" I respond, leaning back into the seat I was in.

"I'm good. Miss you though," he says, making a small smile come up on my face. After all this shit and hate from Austin, I guess I started to feel like everyone was sick or angry with me, so it's good to know that someone actually does still care.

"I miss you, too," I sigh, speaking truthfully. I mean, he is my boyfriend. Sure, I've established that I may have only started dating him because I was lonely and needed a distraction, but I have come to like him more and more. He's a good guy and does his best to keep me content and it's just simple with him. It's not annoying and complicated like it is here.

"Well, then I've got some good news," he states and I can hear shuffling on the other side of the line.

"Yeah? What is it?" I asked, a smirk in my voice.

"Guess where I'm going to be this Friday, a.k.a Valentines Day," he says, waiting patiently for my answer as I grow confused.

"I have no idea. Uh, home?" I take a pretty crappy guess.

"Nope. Kansas City for a business trip," he states, almost with pride in his voice. I frown, part confused on why he's telling me this and then part upset because I know on his business trips he likes to go to bars with his buddies and sometimes strip clubs and we all know that just leads to flirting and me getting cheated on. I don't want that to happen again.

"Yeah, so what?" I grumble.

He snorts, "And where are you going to be on the 14th of February?"

I huff, "I don't know, I'd have to check."

"Go do that then."

I lazily groan as I push myself up from me seat and carefully walk over to the front of the bus where the schedule is taped up on. I find the dates column on the side and drag my finger down it to find the 14th. When I get there I move my finger horizontally to find the column with the locations.

"Uh, the 14th I will be in... Kansas City," I state aloud, my confusion slipping while realization stepped in. "Wait what?" I laugh. "How did that happen?"

"I was planned to be sent on a trip for the company sometime this month and I may have gone and pulled some strings with my boss," he says and I listen intently. "So this means I can be with my girl on Valentines Day," his voice changes tone, an octave deeper.

It only reminds me how I haven't really done anything with him yet and how he probably thinks something will happen on Valentines Day in two days. I don't know if I'm ready for that. Not after Austin.. Not after Jelly Bean.

"That's great," I say, forcing it out a bit. I don't mean for it to come out like this, it's just after thinking about Austin and Jelly Bean, I was a little heart hurt. Plus, I just remembered how terribly awkward it will be with him here. But, it's okay. I do want to see him. It will be good to get some normality back.

"Don't sound too excited," Dom says, making me sigh as I move to go plop back down on the couch.

"Sorry, I was just thinking about something else," I say truthfully, resting my head back against the couch cushion. The rest of my band were either in the back room or their bunks, so I had freedom to sprawl out here.

"Yeah, what about?" Dom asks, making me sigh again, my lips dramatically vibrating like a horse. Dom knows about Austin in a sense that he knows he's my ex, but he does not know that Austin is on this tour with me...

"Remember my ex that Syd told you about?" I question nervously. Of course I didn't tell him, I never even thought Austin's name back then, but eventually, Syd brought him up when she gave Dom the boyfriend check. Yeah, my family is crazy.

"Uhh," Dom thinks. "What's his name?"

"Austin," I clear my throat, suddenly feeling like somehow he's going to hear me talk about him. I don't know, he's just such a pain in my ass.

"Yeah, I guess I remember," Dom says blandly, almost bored. "Why were you thinking about your ex?" He sounded more of agitated than bored now.

"I mean, I wasn't thinking about him, but more so of like what it will be like with him and you..." I guess now is as good of time as any to tell Dom that he's here.

"I'm not following," Dom snarks.

"Don't get mad, okay?" I ask, really, really not wanting another person angry and fighting with me.

"No promises."

I huffed, debating if I should now just make something up, but deciding that it's too late, I just tell the truth in one big, rushed breath. "Austin's in a band and he's touring with me and it's going to be really awkward," I didn't take breaths between words, just pushed it all out fast as if I could be over and done with it the faster I said it. Yeah, I was wrong.

"Wait, let me get this straight," Dom laughs sarcastically. "You forgot to mention that you were going to be touring with your ex for months on end and just now thought it would be good to tell me?" He's angry. Dammit he's angry. I shouldn't have told him, but I needed to. I should have told him a while ago, really.

"Uh.. I mean, yeah, but.."

"Jesus Christ. What if I just went on a trip with my ex girlfriend? And got drunk and partied with her and a bunch of girls all night? Oh, and then on top of that, I DIDN'T TELL YOU?" Dom was upset, that's obvious, but it had me pinching the bridge of my nose, not needing this, but also feeling really small by him now yelling at me too.

"Dominic, please just calm down. It's not like that," I speak, barely even able to get my last syllable out before he's getting loudly worked up again.

"Then what's it like, Hazel?!"

"Would you please just stop yelling, I have a headache," I try to ask kindly as I stand up from the couch, a hand placed on my throbbing head.

"You're just trying to get me to forget about this! There's always an excuse, Hazel," he's not one hundred percent wrong about that, but still. He doesn't realize how many fights I've gotten in with Austin that have l really pushed me to the edge. I'm bound to explode sometime and if he keeps this up, unfortunately for him, he just might receive all my angst. But also, I'll crash and burn because all this fighting is wearing me down.

I start to pace to keep my cool, slowly walking down the open space in the bus. "I'm not trying to do anything, I seriously just have a headache and don't need you yelling at me," I say, grumbling.

"Sure, Hazel, let me just sit here and praise you for cheating on me and then completely forget about it," Dom says with a sarcastic voice that pisses me off.

"Oh my God, I didn't cheat on you! Stop being so over dramatic!" I exclaim, using my hands for emphasis even though he can't see me.

"Over dramatic?! I'm not stupid, I know what band guys are all about on tour! Drugs, drinking, sex, partying, and God knows what else! You're part of that! With your ex!" He argues through the phone. As he's finishing, the door to the back room opened and the rest of my band came out. They all stopped to give me a look and mouthed 'what's up?' They must have heard the yelling, so I just pointed to my phone, mouthed 'Dom', gave a thumbs up to let them know it was okay so they didn't worry, and then used my hand to shoo them away.

The bus was parked so they all headed out, heading to the stage while I stayed here to fight with my boyfriend.

"It's not like that, Dom. It's not like some fucking movie," I growl a bit, sick of this.

"Oh, so there's no alcohol? No parties? And absolutely no weed or sex?" He asked with sarcasm like he knew the answer.

"Just because some people do that mean that everyone-"

"Stop being a bitch about it and making up excuses! You knew I wasn't happy about you going on this tour anyway, but now I find out that it's with your ex?! Jesus Christ, Hazel!" He yells, but I feel anger bubbling up even higher when he calls me a bitch. That's Austin's favorite thing to call me and he got under my skin so much that he left that name under there so now for some reason, it pisses me off to no end.

"Do not call me a bitch!" I growl. It's one thing for Austin to call me it when we are fighting like dogs, but not my boyfriend. When I dated Austin he never once called me anything. He rarely ever fought with me, either. "And since when did I have to let you or Austin run my life? I was going on this tour wether or not either of you were here! I'm doing this for myself!"

"Well you could have at least fucking thought about what I might feel!" He exclaims.

"It's always about you! Can't you just give me a break!" I yell, wide eyed.

"Since when is it always about me?! It's always you and your problems and your family and your band and every fucking other thing! All I do is listen to your bitchy whining!" He yells back.

"I said don't call me a bitch! I'm not a fucking dog!"

"I'm just calling it how I see it, Hazel," he snaps.

"Fuck you! Why do you have to be like this?!" I ask, exasperated.

"Me?! Why is this all on me?! You're the one who started this by fucking lying to me!" He had the same tone I did.

"I didn't lie to you! Stop being insane!"

I think if anything, I'm the more insane one, but I tried to be civil. I've been having a shit time with people hurting me and being angry with me, so it's not all my fault that I'm getting mad at him. He though, just needed a reason.

But now, I was just wondering how long this is going to last because I can't take it anymore. I can't take fighting anymore. I'm done.


Austin's pov:

"What did you say she was doing?" I ask Sam as he walks past me, out from his bus with his band in tow. Well, everyone besides Hazel, who is still in there.

"Fighting with her boyfriend," Kush answers for him, almost as if he was annoyed with it. It made me wonder how much it happened.

My eyebrows crease together as I stand, looking up at the door to her bus. I swear if I listen close enough, I can hear yelling coming from inside. Everyone slowly started to disperse from the crowd we formed as we all got off the buses, but I stayed to look at her bus. For some reason I got mad that her boyfriend was fighting with her. I only felt that for a split second, but when I did, I felt as if he shouldn't because I'm the only one that can fight with her. I'm the only one with that privilege. Stupid, I know.

But I seriously am considering going in there, her dad's request repeating in my head. I don't know what I'd do or say and it probably be really awkward since we sort of hate each other, but doesn't this fall under the premise of 'taking care of her'?

While these thoughts ran around in my head and I looked at the bus door, more yelling could be heard faintly. But then, suddenly, the door swung open and Hazel was running angrily down the stairs. I barely caught sight of her face that was stuck in a deep frown and the red tint to her cheeks and eyes. It almost seemed as if she was going to cry..

She hadn't cried once while we fought and seemed to never let it get to her, maybe that's why I kept it up. But now that I see her with foggy, tired eyes, I feel bad for pushing her too far.

I turned on my heel to watch her storm fast from her bus, pushing through people around her to get away. I even caught Alan trying to go to her side to see what's wrong, but she shoved his arm away, making him stumble in surprise before she continued to hurry away from everyone.

I watched her leave for a while, gnawing on my cheek while I sorted threw what was in my head. I felt as if I should do something, for her dad at least, but I didn't know what.

And as I started to follow in her path, I decided to make up what to do on the way.


Hazel's p.o.v:

I can't do this stupid shit anymore. I don't have it in me. I'm tired.

It's one emotionally and physically exhausting fight after another with the people I care about. First Austin, non stop, then Alan betrays me twice in a fucking row, and now my boyfriend gave me all that shit. I can't deny the overwhelming feeling that everyone would rather hurt me than give a shit about me. The proof is there for that to make sense.

Hurrying into the building our set was at, I weaved through people with clenched fists until I got backstage. It was empty here, but not private enough. I can't let anyone see me like this.
Eventually, I found a small dressing room that was empty and I let myself go inside, leaning against the door once I close it.

I let out a sigh, but a whimper snuck out, my eyes burning from the tears that wanted to escape. I laugh sarcastically at myself, angrily wiping at them. Why am I crying? God, I hate crying.

I'm the one who hung up on Dom and turned my phone off because I couldn't take it anymore. How pathetic is that? I'm the one that thought I was doing good and being strong, not letting this shit get to me. But I guess a certain amount of fighting and getting hurt cant bring any person down.

Sniffling, I push myself away from the closed door and walk over to the couch in here. But for some reason, I look at it and decide against it, sliding down onto the ground instead. I let my body slump and bury my head in my hands, trying to keep myself together.

I wish I could have Syd here, or my dad, or Alan, or... Au- No. No, that was stupid to even think.

After sitting here for a while, replaying all the fights and all the yelling that's been done recently, I get myself even more and more worked up. I'm supposed to be having the time of my life here, not hiding in a dressing room to fucking cry.

I was jerked out of my thoughts when I heard the door swinging open, making me look up from my hands to see Austin standing in the doorway. What is he doing here? God, I don't need this!

I sit up straight and wipe at my eyes, angry that Austin saw me weak because now I can't show off how good I am... Or was.. Or pretended to be. "If you're here just to fight with me then go away," I mumble, not looking at him.

He didn't respond, just stood there for a moment like he was thinking what to do. But then he surprised and confused me when he stepped in and shut the door behind him. I looked at him with furrowed eyebrows as he slowly came over, pulling up his pants before getting down on the ground to sit in front of me.

I stare at him in shock and confusion, waiting for him to do something rash or yell at me, but all he does is scratch the back of his neck and awkwardly clear his throat. "I'm not here to fight with you, I-" he cuts himself off, seeming shy with his words, but then lifted his butt up so he could reach into his back pocket and pull something out. "I got this off Tyler," he held up nothing other than a blunt.

Is he serious? He got me weed?

"They wouldn't let me get any alcohol so I snuck this back," he moved his hand out to hand it to me. "You looked like you could use it."

I looked at him skeptically, not believing this, but also not being able to catch his eyes because he wasn't looking at me. Then he spoke up when I took to long. "I'm not going to sit here and hold my arm out so if you're not going to take the damn thing then tel-" his angriness was back, but I cut it off by reaching out and taking it from him, getting him to stop.

"I don't have a lighter," I state quietly, holding it close to me.

Austin's anger slips away and he process what I said before reaching into his pocket again, pulling out a lighter and signaling me to get the blunt ready. Agreeing that I did need some type of release, and since alcohol wasn't an option, I put the blunt in between my lips, watching Austin closely as he leaned forward to light it for me. The skin between his eyes creased together in concentration while his familiar brown orbs light up with the reflection of the small flame.

This is the first time we've been this close and calm, so it was the first time I've been able to really take in Austin's appearance. He had the beginning scruff of a beard over most of his face, making him look a lot more mature. He had more tattoos that I didn't recognize, so they obviously were new. And I could barely catch the smell of his scent, but then he leaned away and my nose was filled with the stench of weed.

I took a big, long drag right away, breathing in the mellowing drug before blowing it out, my eyes still on Austin's. I could feel the smoke infiltrating my lungs, and then being released with some of my stress. But, I could still feel the anxiety from Austin watching me, only making me take another drag while I wondered why he was here and why we were being civil to each other.

But with each drag, thoughts and worries like that slipped away, making me feel at ease. And then I took it away from my lips, holding it out to Austin. He looked at it, then me, so I urged it towards him, getting him to take it from me and take a drag out of it. Why am I being so civil towards him?

I watched his lips as he blew the smoke back out, smiling slightly at the sight. I felt so calm and loose and worry free that it's probably a bad thing. It dangerous to be like this around Austin, but as of now, I don't want to care about anything.

Soon, we somehow ended up moving closer together, our knees brushing while we looked at each other with wide, stoned eyes. Smoke danced in the air around us, but we were too busy looking at each other to care.

"You're boyfriend seems like a dick," Austin breaks the silence, his words taking a minute to actually process in my brain. And when they did, I snorted.

"You don't know him," I shrug. "And you're a dick, too, so.."

"Yeah, but I'm not your boyfriend," he said, catching my eyes as he did. He didn't say the words rudely, but in fact, with intensity behind them. They had the stoned smile on my face quickly fading away while I looked at him. I couldn't read the expression in his eyes and I wish I could.

I open my mouth to say something back, but my mind seems blank so I just sit there with a dangling jaw. My eyes move though, and I soon I see the top of his scar peeking out from under his tank top.

My mind was hazy and distracted and I couldn't stop myself from reaching my hand out and letting my finger tips brush against his warm skin, trailing down his scar as I wondered if the weed was bad for his heart. It was deathly silent as my fingertips left a wake of chills in their path, but then I was stopped by Austin's hand wrapping around my wrist, getting me to look up and meet his eyes again.

I didn't notice when or how, but he seemed a lot closer and now, I felt strong tension radiating off of us both. He must have felt it too because I could see it in not only his eyes, but also his expression as we seemed to both lean towards each other.

Thoughts like 'what's happening?' and 'holy fuck' ran through my head, but then got lost in the haze. I wasn't in my right frame of mind and couldn't seem to process a sensible thought with Austin this close to me. And I was only also getting closer to him.

It got to the point where our faces were barely centimeters away from each other. His hand was still holding onto my wrist, but neither of us noticed. All I could think of was the way I could feel his hot breath roll onto my skin and how both of our lips were parted, a gap the size of a strand of hair separating them.

The tension was pumping through my veins, putting me in this trance that his brown eyes held me in. I felt out of control of my body and my mind, like I was frozen in this stupid decision.

"We can't do this," I breathe out in a whisper, but don't move. Something inside me is pulling me towards him.

Austin doesn't respond, just looks down at my lips and then deeply into my eyes.

Then I realized that this was happening. That this is Austin.

I was right, we can't do this. I can't do this. Austin hurt me. He cheated on me. We're over and I have a boyfriend now. And this will just complicate things to no extent. Austin and I hate each other, remember? This can't happen. I can't let this happen.

"We can't do this," I repeat, more sternly this time, coming to realization with whats happening and start frantically pulling my wrist from Austin's grip. "We can't do this," I'm getting worked up now, pushing away from him and getting up onto my feet.

"Hazel, wait," he gets up too, trying to grab onto my arm to stop me, but I don't let him.

"I can't do this," I breathe with pain in my voice. "Let me go. Now."

Surprisingly, he does what I say, letting my arm slip from his grasp. I'm barely able to watch his face fall in what seems to be sadness, but then switch into hard anger, before I turn and quickly hurry out of the dressing room, leaving him standing there.

What did I just do?

Notes

(sorry about all the weed lol) oh my, guys! So sorry it's took me so long to update for y'all! I've had countless graduation parties and stuff to go to and on top of that I've had finals myself! (I still do, but I'm procrastinating against studying rn)!

But I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter because I just randomly threw it together and am still not sure how I feel about it haha! But the next chapter is going to be so fun to write omg i think you guys will like it lots!:)

What do you think will happen? What do you think of Dom? Let me know what you think and feel free to distract me from studying with your wonderful comments that make my day:)<3 Love you guys!