Like Loving A Lion (SEQUEL to I'm Not That Perfect)

"If they take my hand
Will it be to burn me or to say ‘amen’?
We beckon so we can make amends
And with the same flip of the hand we curse our friends.” I sang several days later while Matt played guitar. We were doing an acoustic show and another signing.

"And where it’s all a blur, you are the hard line
In the disorder, you are the peace sign.”

"J’ai tant voulu savoir (I really wanted to know)
Si mes peurs ont tout fait pour m’égarer (If my fears did it all to lead me astray)
Mais quand la vérité se cache (But when the truth hides itself)
Je te suivrai où que tu veuilles aller (I’ll follow you wherever you want to go).” I smiled as I sang, looking down at the ring on my hand. I wrote this song about Austin.

"Where it’s all a blur, you are the hard line
In the disorder, you are the peace sign.”

"Et quand la guerre éclate, tu es le silence (And when the riots stir, you are the sound mind)
Et dans tout ce désordre, you are the peace sign (And in the disorder, you are the peace sign).”

"I can’t tell if they’re laughing at me or with me
All these hints and subtleties got me on my knees
Begging for serenity.”

"And where it’s all a blur, you are the hard line
In the disorder, you are the peace sign
And when riots stir, tu es le silence
And in the disorder, you are the peace sign
Et quand la guerre éclate, you are the sound mind
Et dans tout ce désordre, you are the peace sign
And in the disorder, you are the peace sign
In the disorder, you are the peace sign.” Everyone cheered and we went to start signing.
"That’s a nice rock, Ave. I wish someone loved me that much." Nate said.
"I know." I sighed happily. "I can’t stop looking at it."
"Have you guys set a date yet?" A girl asked while we were signing a picture for her.
"Not yet. We’ve only been engaged for almost a week honestly, so we’ve not really started planning much yet." I replied.
"Your ring is so beautiful." Another girl said, staring.
I laughed. “Thank you. I’m a lucky girl.”
**
I drove my badass new car home into a warzone. My brothers were yelling at Chloe, Chloe was yelling back, my parents were trying to soothe them and Austin was left in an awkward position.
"-I told you not to bring it up last week and you did anyways!" My brother John was saying to Chloe, looking furious. "Are you some kind of idiot?"
"I wasn’t trying to be an asshole! I just wanted to know! And I figured it would be better to ask whenever Avery wasn’t around!" She threw her hands up, clearly frustrated.
"What the hell is going on here?" I asked, butting in.
It was silent.
Finally, after a long pause, Leonardo answered. “Chloe decided it would be a good idea to ask Austin if you going to… um-“
"I was curious as to whether or not you wanted to have a baby! Sue me!" Chloe yelled.
"It was the way you said it, Chloe! Besides, it was his baby too! You are so insensitive!" Leo replied. "And that’s not it, Avery. She’s been texting Ronnie.”
"Way to throw me under the bus." Chloe said, glaring at him.
"You’ve been what?!" I demanded.
"What? He’s nice." She rolled her eyes.
"I thought he was really nice too, until he beat me!" I cried. "You are not to talk to him. Ever."
"But Avery!" She tried to protest.
"You have the audacity to come into my house and stir up trouble over something that, in all honesty, is none of your business, and then I find out that you have been talking to someone who abused me both physically and mentally?" I asked.
"You-"
"Chloe." I said quietly. "You can be angry with me all you like, but I don’t care. You mean more to me than that. Do. Not. Talk. To. Him. Never again."
"We need to leave." Leo said. "Our flight is soon."
I sighed. “Right. Do you need me to drive you?”
"We got a cab. No worries." He said. We did our goodbyes and they left. Thank god. I loved my family to death but they were terribly stressful.
I collapsed facedown on the couch, moaning. “Jesus Christ.”
"Hey, it’s fine. Really." Austin said, rubbing my back.
"What did she say to you?" I asked, sitting up.
"What everyone was thinking." He sighed. "Ave, we should probably talk about it."
"A baby?" I asked slowly. I could feel my eyes watering and I hated myself for crying at the mention of a child.
"Do you want to?" He asked softly. "Do you want to try again?"
I bit my lip. “I’m scared, Austin.”
"So am I, Ave." He said.
"I can’t. I just can’t. For Christ’s sakes, I can barely even see a baby in public without going bat shit crazy. Maybe in the future, but not now." I said, wiping my eyes.
"Okay. I’m totally fine with that." He said. "How was your day, future Mrs Carlile?"
"Nice. I sang about you." I smiled.
"You know the Kerrang Awards are this week?" He asked.
"Jesus! They are! I guess we’ll have to fly to London." I laughed. "Aren’t we nominated?"
"I’m up for Best International Newcomer and your band is nominated for Best Music Video for ‘Peace Sign’." He said.
"That’s the song I sang about you this morning." I grinned.
"You're the most adorable thing I've ever seen in my life." He laughed. "We'd better start packing soon.
"Do we have to?" I groaned.

Notes

filler. song is really by Lights xx