Meet My Dedication

It wasn't the packing up my room that was hard, or even listening to my mother complain about who was going to clean the house after I was gone. It was saying goodbye to Milly and Gavin that, truly, was holding me back from leaving for the tour with Austin and the guys.
We decided that we would ship my car to Austin's apartment in California, while we went on the tour, along with majority of my things that couldn't be brought on the buses. It wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be.
I had quit both of my jobs, which wasn't hard to do at all. My bosses understood completely, in light of the circumstances. All of the guys helped me with packing, once Austin made a phone call to Alan. They were at my house, packing and making sure my mom didn't put up too much fuss. Milly and I were on the computer, finding me a job for when the tour was over, looking for furniture to put in Austin's (empty) spare room (temporarily my room). I knew that I would eventually find my own apartment, despite Austin's arguments, because I refused to intrude on him.

Once everything was shipped, and we knew it got to Austin's apartment, I was ready to leave. My mother and I had fought more than usual, to the point where I'd lock myself up in my room and drink until I passed out. I had locked away most of the sharp objects that taunted me at my lowest points. I wasn't going to break my promise to Austin, I couldn't. It wasn't how I wanted to spend the last week living in the house I had grown up in.
The house were I had so many memories, good, bad, painful and ugly. I couldn't wait to leave, but I couldn't help but want to stay. I knew I couldn't, though, not with my dad coming back soon.
The Judge had decided, since I had pressed charges against him, that he be put on house arrest once I was safely moved out and my place of residency was changed. I agreed, and was given a whole month to get all of my affairs in order.
Austin had given me a job as their merch girl, which I was fine with, and when we got to California I was going to start finding an actual teaching job and put my degree in English to work. I'd always wanted to be a teacher, for High School. i don't know why, and I don't question it either, it's just always been a goal of mine.
"Ready to go?" Austin smiled at me, taking my hand in his as we stood in the middle of my, no empty, room. The only thing that was left was an empty bookshelf, dresser, the mirror, and my bed and my entertainment center, I figured I didn't need the TV or stereo, I had my iHome for my phone. I let out a heavy sigh and nodded.
"More than I ever thought I would be." I grabbed my purse and smiled back up at him.
Milly and Gavin had said their goodbyes the night before, at dinner. The four of us went down to Fujiyama for Japanese food, and drinks. I couldn't have had a better last night in Florida than that. There was love, laughs, hugs, tears, and plenty of food to last us all a lifetime.

"I'm gonna be so lost without you around, Mikey. What am I gonna do now? Who am I gonna tell my secrets to, and go shopping with?" The tears were overflowing from Millly's eyes, and yet her make-up was still perfect, and she still was still the prettiest girl in the room.
"You'll be fine, Mills. You have Gavin and Marshall and your other friends." I gave her the biggest hug I'd ever given anyone. "I'm only a phone call away, and I'm only a few hours behind you."
"I know, but... still."
"I love you big sis," I smiled at her. My big sister, my twin.
"I love you more, little sis." We hugged one last time, and cried until we couldn't anymore.

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"This is it, kid. You get to go on a big adventure, the worlds a scary place. Think you can handle it?" Gavin's smile was as big and goofy as the sun was bright.
"I think I can handle it, I got a good team to help me along the way." I looked over at Austin, talking to Milly.
"That you do. Keep in touch, and hey, maybe we'll come visit," he winked at me and gave me one of his famous Gavin hugs.
"You're my best friend, Gavin. Take good care of my sister. Don't make me come back here and kick your ass, or worse," I grinned.
"What could be worse?!" He mocked being scared, I giggled.
"I'll get Austin to kick it for me." His eyes went wide and we both busted out laughing.

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I got onto the bus, put my purse on the small table and plopped myself onto the couch. I didn't say anything, I just stared out the window as we drove off from the house. Austin had gone to the back, with the rest of the guys, as they left me alone in silence. I stared out until I couldn't see the house anymore, with tears falling down my face, silently. No one really knew what to do or say until Austin came to sit beside me, wrapping me up into his arms.
He kissed the side of my head and shifted to where I was cradled into his arms, laying on his lap. "I have something for you."
I looked up at him "What is it?"
He had a big smile on his face, it made me want to melt. He helped me sit up, I turned around to face him. "Close your eyes."
I did so and sat up on my legs. "Okay." I couldn't help but smile. I usually hated surprises.
I heard him fish something out of his pocket. I head a box snap closed, jewelry? Then felt a cold silver chain touch the side of my neck, I instinctively lifted up my hair for him to clasp the chain together. "You got me a necklace?"
"Open your eyes," was all he said, I could tell he was still smiling.
I opened my eyes and looked down. A small gasp escaped when I saw the two butterflies, one purple and one blue, hanging on the end. That was mine and Milly's favorite colors, and butterflies were my favorite insect. It was the most beautiful, most perfect gift I'd ever received.
"Oh, Austin, I love it!" I turned to look at him and gave him a big kiss, still smiling.
"I knew you would, Milly helped me pick it out." He wrapped his arms around me again, and we just continued kissing until I heard Alan laughing.
"You owe me 5 bucks, Phil."
"No, I said she'd love it, you thought she'd only like it."
"I hate you."
"That's nice dear now pay up."
I giggled and just snuggled into Austin. "Thank you for my present, it's beautiful."
"Just like you," he kissed my head and I closed my eyes, finally relaxing as we drove to Orlando for the upcoming show. I didn't protest, or argue. I let his comment be, for now.

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"So," Alan said with a mouthful of chocolate chip pancakes, "are you and Austin like.... a thing, yet?"
We were sitting at IHOP, the morning of their first concert with A Day To Remember. It had only been a couple of days since I left my house, but I was already a little homesick, even with all the distractions the guys were dishing out, even Jeremy was trying to keep my busy with little errands everyone needed done. I didn't mind the busy work, it kept my mind off of everything going on in my head.
"I don't know, Alan. He hasn't said anything about it, and I haven't really thought about bringing it up." I was picking at my red velvet pancakes, they were my favorite. I was just not hungry this morning, but Alan was picking a subject I was afraid to think about.
Austin and I had been together for about a month now, since he'd come to see my at work and everything happened. We hadn't gotten much alone time since then, to really talk about it, and with the tour and moving, we didn't have time to. He was busy with sound checks and interviews, that I was spending most of my time reading in the hotel we were staying at, or out exploring Orlando, which wasn't much for me to discover.
"You should ask him, soon." He had scarfed down his whole breakfast, and I wasn't even half way done with mine. Once he noticed my uneasiness, he changed the subject, "are you excited for tonight? First night of the tour! And you get to work the merch booth for us!"
"Who usually did it?" I looked up at him from my pancakes.
"Sometimes it'd be the same person who sold the other bands stuff, we've never had an 'official' merch person." He finished his drink and we got the check.
"Oh, well, okay then. Does this make me the 'official merch person' then?" I finished my coffee.
"You betcha! So, when you going to tell Austin?"
I gave him a confused, "tell Austin what?"
"That you love him."

Notes

Mikey's going away outfit (plus Austin's gift): http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=108404293

Sorry it's taken me forever to finish this chapter, I'm trying my best to balance out everything, and making you wait. Love you all for sticking around, though!