Forgive Me- Part 1

Amelia's POV

Becca is starting to get on my nerves. I just want to relax; I don't need her constantly breathing down my back making sure I've eaten. Yea I'm forgetful sometimes but I don't need her basically force feeding me. But it's only four days until my birthday. The one day I get to myself. Yea it took a while but I convinced Becca and Isaac two years ago that I should be able to spend my birthday how I want. And what I want is to be alone. They do get me back for it the weekend after though, forcing me to go out with them and have 'fun'. I never have fun when I go out. It's just too stressful. Well it wasn't when I was with Jaime. No! You're not allowed to think about him. You're shutting him out of your mind. You don't need the extra pain. My eyes flickered to my bathroom where I kept my razors as my hand began to scratch at my leg. Why did I promise? Bloody bastard, I need it but I promised him.

I go to the draw beside my bed and pull out a piece of paper with a number on it. I can't help but stare at what was underneath it in the draw; some money and another piece of paper, with his hand writing on it. 'My shout ;)' that bastard. I couldn't bring myself I go back to the coffee shop. It didn't feel right without him. I remember when I found it. I grasped it for dear life, not wanting to let go of the memories but knowing that I would have to, but not yet. I can't let it go yet.

I sigh and turn my attention back to the paper in my hand and call the number on it.

"Hello?"

"Alex?"

"Yeaaa, who is this?"

"It's Amelia..."

"Amelia?! How are you? I've been worried about you"

"I'm okay I guess, I just needed someone to talk to, to get my mind off things"

"What kind of things?"

"I made a promise that I'm finding very difficult to keep"

"What was it?"

"You know talking about it doesn't really get my mind off of it..."

"Right, sorry. So what have you been up to?"

"Not a great deal, working and chilling at home really"

"Wow you have such an exciting life"

"Oh shut up 'Mr I am the lead singer of an awesome band' not all of us get to be rock stars"

"Truuuueeee, but still. Why don't you go to a party or something?"

"But that would require human interaction..."

"Well generally yes, that is how it works"

"Eww" he laughed at my comment and agreed. We talked for hours, which is odd for me, normally I struggle to talk on the phone at all but here I am, having a casual conversation with some famous guy I've only met once. Wow. Jaime really changed me in the short time we were together...

"Hey what's your twitter and Instagram?" Alex asked suddenly

"Umm, I don't have either..."

"WHAT?! WHO ARE YOU?" I just laughed. "You get your ass on a computer right now and make a twitter. I'll even be your first follower."

"But it's a social networking site and I'm not social"

"And I don't care"

"But I don't know what to do?"

"Get on your computer and I'll talk you through it." I sighed in defeat before walking over to my desk in my room and turning on my laptop.

He talked me through it and he made me follow him and his band mates as well as members of other bands. I even found Tony, I did however avoid following Jaime when I stumbled upon him. But I couldn't scroll past the photo. It was a photo of the two of us in Civic Centre. Who the hell took this? The caption was '@PTVJaime, why didn't you tell us you had a new girlfriend?' I looked back up at the photo and had to admit, we did kind of look like a couple. It was a really nice photo. I saved it to my computer ignoring the voice in my head saying it was a bad idea. Before looking at the comments.

'Wow, really? You could do a lot better'

'Is she even an American?'

'She's probably just a band whore'

I didn't even know these people! Why were they saying this?! They were right though... Alex noticed my sudden silence and sighed.

"You found the photo didn't you" I nodded and it took a moment to realise he could see me so I whispered a yes.

"Hey, screw the fans, they don't know what they're talking about, and screw Jaime he's a jerk. Now. Back to making twitter. You haven't followed me."

"That's the only reason you wanted me to do this isn't it, you want as many followers as you can get."

"Well yes, but not that's not why. Everyone should have a twitter, now follow me" I went to his page and clicked the follow button.

"Happy?"

"Thrilled." Suddenly I had a notification. I clicked on it to see that I have one follower and sure enough, it was Alex

"Yay! I have a follower, oh. Eww. It's that weird singer, why the fuck is he following me?"

"Watch it missy"

I smiled and suddenly I was getting heaps of notifications.

"Ahhhh something's happening!"

"Followers?"

"Yea"

"Yea I probably should have warned you about that"

"Do they just sit there looking at who you follow or something? That's kinda creepy"

"You're telling me..."

"Okay, I have twitter. Now what do I do with it?"

"Write what you're doing, you can tag people or things."

"How?"

"People by using the @ key and things by using #"

"Awesome." I figured that I should make a post so I at least had something.

'Bloody @AlexAllTimeLow made me get twitter. You owe me. <3"

"There you go, I made a post" it was quiet on the line for a minute before I heard a laugh and soon it had another notification. Alex had replied to my tweet.

'@MillyMaw you know you love me ;) <3'

'@AlexAllTimeLow you're an idiot'

'@MillyMaw doesn't change the fact that you love me'

'@AlexAllTimeLow you wish honey'

At this point we had stopped talking on the phone aside from the bursts of laughter when we read watch others tweets.

"Okay well I'm going to go to bed now."

"What? Why? I was having fun!"

"It's late and I'm tired"

"But it's only 10!" What? how did he know that?

"Wait are you guys still in Australia?"

"Yea we don't leave until the 24th"

"Ohh"

"What's up buttercup?"

"It's nothing"

"It's okay. Tony said he would keep him away"

"I know..."

"Do you not want him to?"

"I do and I don't"

"Well you still have a few days to decide"

"I know"

"Well good night MillyMaw'

"Night AlexAllTimeLow"

I hung up and sighed before sliding into bed. Do I want to see him? Yes. Do I think I can handle it? No. And that right there is the problem. Even though I miss him I know that if I see him I'll probably start yelling again and I hate that. I don't want to be angry at him. I just want to be curled up against his chest like the night before he left. Maybe I should call Tony... No. No. No. You are not going down this path again. The last time
you felt like this you had your heart ripped from your chest and torn to pieces. I shake my head, I can't let that happen again.

Notes

I really need to stop writing this at midnight -_- I feel like night time is meant to be used for sleep instead...