The Journal

It's been 2 weeks since the incident with Mike and Austin, and I haven't spoken to either of them. Well, not much anyway. It kind of made things awkward between everyone, and I felt kind of bad. Oli and I have been going off on our alone quite a lot just to talk, and sometimes we are just quiet. We didn't need to fill the silence, because it was nice and comforting.

"Where's Asshole number 2?" I asked, looking around the table to find no Austin. Mike rolled his eyes but stayed quiet.

"Don't worry about it," Kellin smiled slightly.

"He never skips school. Where is he? Picking another girl for a bet?"

"Bonnie. Stop," Alan shook his head at me.

"Where is he?!" I demanded, looking to Vic for the answer. I knew he'd tell me.

"Bon, his Mom passed away last night..." he sighed. My heart dropped and guilt immediately flooded me.

"Oh..."

"Go see him. I know you want to," Oli whispered, nudging me gently. He was right, I did want to.

"I'm going to go see him," I said, standing up.

"You're going to ditch... Again?" Matt asked in disbelief. I have been skipping a lot of school recently, but right now school is the least of my problems.

"I can't just not see him,"

"I'm not to sure that's a good idea," Tony looked at me.

"I do," I lied. It wasn't a good idea at all, but I wanted to see Austin. I had to make sure he's okay.

"Just let her go," Jaime rolled his eyes as they were all starting to protest.

"Thanks Hime," I smiled at him before walking away from the table.

"Chica?" I froze and turned around to face Mike, who was looking guiltily at me.

"What?" I snapped. It looked like he wanted to say something, but kept his mouth closed. I sighed in frustration before walking away yet again.





I nervously knocked on Austin's front door, my anxiety getting the better of me as I was here by myself and I have not met any of Austin's family before. A tired and stressed looking man opened the door, glancing at me for a second before smiling at me slightly. He looked a bit like Austin, so I was assuming he was his father,

"Bonnie," he stated.

"You know me?" I asked in confusion.

"I do. There is a picture of you and my son in his bedroom. He talks about you a lot,"

"Really?"

"Yeah, he really likes you," I chose to ignore that. I'm not to sure he knows about Austin's betting thing. "I suppose I know why you're here..."

"Umm, yeah. I was hoping to talk to Austin..."

"I'm not sure how he'd feel about company, but we can always try. He was very close to his mother,"

"Mr Carlile, I'm so sorry about your loss," He gave me a sad smile before leading me to a closed door.

"Austin, you have a visitor," Mr Carlile knocked gently on the door.

"I don't want to see them," Just his voice itself sounded scratchy and dry.

"Aus? It's me," I said. It was silent for a moment.

"... Bonnie?"

"Yeah, it's me,"

"Come in," I opened the door and closed it behind me, smiling at Austin's dad before I did so, so I didn't feel rude. The scene in front of me pretty much tore my heart in two.

Austin was laid out on his bed, looking at the ceiling, his face was drained of colour, and his eyes seemed hauntingly empty and were stained with tears.

"Hey," I whispered, hesitantly sitting on the bed by his feet incase he didn't want me any closer.

"I miss her,"

"I know what it feels like " I smiled sadly at him.

"I doubt that,"

"My mom died 2 years ago Austin,"

"Oh... I'm sorry," he frowned.

"Don't be... This isn't about me. This is about you. Are you okay?" I asked, moving closer and lying next to him, our shoulders slightly touching.

"Honestly, no. I feel like I've been hit by a truck. I'm mentally and physically drained. I don't think I can even cry anymore,"

"It sucks, I know," I whispered, gently grabbing his head and resting it on my chest. He needed the comfort, and I was willingly going to give it to him.

"I thought you hated me," Austin mumbled as I thread my fingers through his hair. I glanced at the picture frame on his bedside table and smiled. It was the picture of him and I on the swings, holding hands. To bad it was just a bunch of lies.

"I don't hate you, I couldn't even if I wanted to. I just hate what you did to me," I admitted, looking up at the ceiling.

"Have you talked to Mike?"

"No,"

"Would you give me another chance?"

"We shouldn't be talking about this," No, I would not give you or Mike another chance, "Austin, you need to sleep. Close your eyes." He slowly listened, and soon enough he was asleep.





27 March, 5:57pm, 2003

It was hard leaving Austin like that. Him and his father were heartbroken, and I hate that I couldn't do anything to fix it. Even though I wanted to be mad at Austin and Mike, to hate them, and to throw bricks at their pretty ass faces, I knew I could never do that. I hated what they done to me, but at the same time they were still my boys. And I wasn't planning on leaving any of them anytime soon.

*****

I woke up to tapping on my window. I hastily walked over to it and looked out, seeing Oli at the bottom.

"Come down here!" he called. I nodded and quickly got dressed, pulling my hair out of it's messy bed ponytail and climbing out of the window to meet him.

"Hey," Oli greeted me with his beautiful smile that made me weak to the knees.

"Hi,"

"Come with me," He shyly held out his hand and I gently took it, admiring how our fingers naturally intertwined with one another, and how perfect our hands looked together. Like 2 pieces to a puzzle. He lead me quite a long way, but it was nice. Before we got to our destination, he covered my eyes gently.

"Do you trust me?" His soft breath hit my neck and I shivered. His is lips touched the skin, making goosebumps appear.

"With my life," And it was the truth. I felt his lips twitch up into a smile before he pulled away from me and continued leading my blind self to... somewhere.

We carried on walking for another 5 minutes before he removed his hands. I gasped at the sight in front of me.

There was was a giant field with a Crystal clear waterfall falling into a pond of water. The moon illuminated enough light to see the grass, sowing the many different gorgeous flowers growing. But what caught my attention the most, was the giant tree house covered in fairy lights.

Oli lead me me over to it, gesturing me o climb up the ladder first. So I did.

Inside was a cute little couch with a bookshelf next to it, holding many different books. There was also a window seat looking out over the pond and I felt like I was in heaven. I loved how the only light source was the fairy lights and the moon. It made it even more special in a way.

This is the most beautiful place I've ever been in.

"What is this place?" I asked in awe, sitting on the couch.

"When I was 8, my neighbor was my best friend. Her name is Hayley. We had always wanted our own little hangout, and this happened to be it. Our dads helped build the treehut, and helped decorate it. We were here most of our free time. When I was 11, she moved away but she made me promise one thing: Only bring special people here. You're the first," I almost 'aww'ed on the spot.

"That is actually really sweet. Thank you,"

"You're welcome, love." He sat on the couch beside me and put my head in his lap before reading me my all time favourite book; Wuthering Heights.

He read it to me, and I stayed awake, and soon enough, the sun was coming up. The last thing I heard in his beautiful accent before my eyes sloped closed, was one of my favourite lines of the book.

"She burned to bright for this world."

Notes