One Moment

Dinner with Austin was great. It was everything that I needed to keep my mind off bad things and on good things like Austin.

For some reason he just knew how to make me happy, or how to keep the atmosphere light and distracting. And for that, I only love him even more.

And right now he was leading me to that same top of the hill we were sitting at earlier, the only difference being that night was here and the stars were just barely starting to come out.
It was peaceful and silent for a while as we laid there together, looking at the sky, but soon we started to talk.

It wasn't about anything too heavy, at least when we started. We just were sharing stories and learning even more about each other. It was a comfortable thing.

But then it got heavy. Because stories of the past always lead to something bad.. At least that's what it seems.. Especially when your past was anything like mine or Austin's.

"School sucked," Austin said, chuckling a bit at the sore subject. "Well, I mean I guess it was fine until like middle school," he corrected. "But I can't even remember before that.."

I propped my head up by resting it on my hand that was connected to the elbow I had on the ground, looking at Austin as he spoke.
He was looking up at the sky, the memories not being too kind on his emotions. I could see the hurt in his eyes as he remembered his past, and it made me feel hurt too. So I put my hand on his chest and ran my fingers over the letterings of his shirt to provide some type of comfort, or to at least let him know I'm here. It is what he's been doing for me lately.

"I never understood how people could be so... mean," Austin spoke, his voice solemn. "What's the point? Does it get anyone anywhere by being a dick?" He rambled on, still not looking at me.

"I think it just gives people a sense of power... To make them feel better about themselves.." I spoke lightly, knowing so well what Austin was asking.

My response finally had Austin looking over to me, his eyes clouded with the old memories that must have been going through his head.

"Tell me what happened," I said, running my hand lightly over his chest. "Tell me what's making you sad," my voice was quiet, but loud enough for Austin to hear loud and clear.
Austin had helped me so much lately that all I want to do is return the favor. I want to be here for him to talk to and to let things out to just like he is for me.

"I'm not sad," he started, a small smile on his face as he reached up to brush some of my hair behind my ear while looking up to me. "I'm just... angry," he spoke so calmly as he talked about his not-so-calm emotion.

"Why?" I asked, barely above a whisper as I imitated the brushing movements his fingers were making, but just on his chest instead.

"Because I wish my past was different," he mumbled. "I mean, I know everything that happened led me to this point, and I don't want to change now, but I just wish somethings didn't have to happen, ya know?"

I nodded at his question, "I know."

"Like I wish I knew that the kids who used to pick on me and call me names and beat me up... all those bullies... I wish I knew that my whole world wasn't those terrible years with all those terrible people.." Austin trailed off, eyes moving back up to the sky as his hand fell down from my hair to intertwine with my fingers on his chest.

"Tell me about them," I whispered, not necessarily demanding, but letting Austin know I was here for him to talk to, as well.

"Are you sure?" Austin turned back to look at me, raising his eyebrows lightly. "I don't want to complain," he whispered back.

"Austin, I have literally been complaining to you basically this whole summer. I think it's fair that you're allowed to complain, too," I spoke, making Austin's head roll to the side in laughter.

"Okay okay, Miss Bossy," he held his hands up, making me swat playfully at his chest with my hand, making him laugh more. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding," he chuckled, grabbing my hand to intertwine his fingers with it again. "I'm honored that you want me to complain to you. I think that is true love," he was still giggling a little and I rolled my eyes at him.

"It's somethin' alright," I mumbled in a teasing tone as I tried bite back my laughter.

Once Austin stopped laughing at himself, he sighed, letting silence linger as he racked through the things in his head while his eyes got lost in the dark sky. "Those assholes did a lot of bullshit to me," he sighed calmly, thumb running over the knuckles on my hand. "But the one day I remember the most was the first day of high school.. the very first day of that new part of my life... And I got in a fight," he shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment. "My Dad had just dropped me off at school and I could barely walk two feet before these kids stole my backpack, unzipped it, threw all my books in the snow... trashed them all... and then met me in the P.E. locker room during fourth period and completely just laid all hell on me.." Austin's hand squeezed mine a little tighter and I felt like the pain he was feeling, or had felt, was flowing into me as he did. "The names they called me.. weren't even the worst part... They beat me up. Literally. Broke three ribs, smashed my head on the toilet, left me there in pain and gave me time to realize that, that was going to be the rest of my life.."

Austin's story had my heart break enough for me to move, laying my head down on the upper part of his chest by his neck and to squeeze the hand of his I was holding close.

"And I remember thinking that for so long. I remember thinking that my life would never change, even when I was older, like when Gielle cheated on me... I lost hope and I wish I hadn't."

I nodded a bit in understanding, thinking of what to say. "The past is over and done with, we can't change it," I spoke against his chest, brushing my thumb over his hand. "But it also defines us. And I think your hard past has only made you more perfect now."

Austin sighed out in content at my words, but still had something nagging at him. "I'm not perfect."

This had my head moving back up from his chest, getting him to look at me. "I know. No one is. But you're perfect for me, and as cheesy as it sounds, you're perfect to me."

The corners of Austin's mouth perked up into a smile as he brought the hand of mine he was holding up to his lips, leaving a light, lingering kiss. "That was really cheesy," he whispered against the skin of my hand, laughing while he did.

"Shut up, it was cute," I sassed him, amusement in my voice.

"It was," he agreed. "But what were you saying?"

"I was saying," I mocked him a bit for joking at my serious words. "I never got beat up in school, but I went through enough bullies to know what it feels like to think life doesn't go on," I started up again, having a point I wanted to get out that was in my head. "I was the freak girl with the messed up family and weird interests. I got put down a lot as a kid, and even with Mark, but now that I'm here.. helping people with music.. and being with you.. I know life is much more. You are my life... And together we've even created life after overcoming so much shit," I was rambling a bit, but seemed to get through to Austin when his hand came up to rest on my cheek, stopping my babbling.

"You're right," he smiled. "Life goes on. I know that. And I'm so happy to say that you and Jelly Bean are mine."

His words had a breath of relief coming out of my mouth and my head lightly fell back down onto his chest, breathing him in. "I'm so happy you're mine, too," I repeated what he said in a mumble, agreeing.

He sighed out at my words, his free hand coming up to rest on my back. It stayed comfortably quite for a while, until Austin started to chuckle at something he thought of. "We are so messed up," he laughed.

"Yeah, but we're the good kind of messed up," I agreed, amusement in my voice.

"Yeah," Austin nodded. "We are." He moved so he was shifted onto his side a bit, getting me to left my head up and look into his milky brown eyes. He gave me his adorable, happy smile right before he ducked his head down so his lips were just barely hovering over mine.

My eyes darted down to his plump lips quickly before going back up to his eyes that were boring into mine with that all too familiar sparkle. "Hmm," he hummed lightly in amusement. "I think I love you a little bit," and with that he finally pressed his lips down on to mine, giving me a warm sensation as I kissed him back softly.

"Only a little bit?" I asked in a mumble as we broke away to turn our heads for a better angle.

He hummed against my lips again, not wanting to break away to answer. I'm glad he didn't because the kiss was to sweet and passionate to want it to end so soon.

But instead of ending it, I let my arms wrap around Austin's neck as he moved so he was hovering over me. "Maybe a lotta' bit," he corrected himself in a mumble before he weaved his hands in my hair lightly.

My heart was swollen, in the good way, because of Austin. And this only made me kiss him back more eagerly, which he noticed.
Our kissing went on for a little bit longer, the affection making me feel a lot better and a lot less broken.

But soon a harsh shiver rolled down my spine from the chilly night air, getting Austin to unfortunately break away from me. "Let's head inside, you're freezing," he said, one of his hands sliding down onto the skin of my stomach that was showing and had goosebumps on it. He rubbed the skin a little bit as if to warm up Jelly Bean before sitting up while grabbing my hands.

He helped me stand up and we brushed off from sitting on the ground for so long.

"Austin.. What do we do with the ring?" I asked randomly before we started walking again, making Austin freeze.

"What do you want to do with it?" He asked, sounding almost afraid of my answer. The subject of the ring between Austin and I was a touchy one.

"I want it gone," I stated, watching the relief come up on Austin's face. "I want it destroyed or just fucking at like the bottom of the ocean or something because that part of my life is over. I'm not that person anymore. It's over."

Austin nodded in understanding and happiness that I was moving past that part of my life. "Okay," he nodded. "We'll destroy it. We'll move on... Together."

"I'm so fucking ready to move on with you and Jelly Bean," I sighed out as I leaned into him, feeling like a nagging weight is slowly being lifted off my shoulders.

I'm so fucking ready to move on. I'm so ready to be happy.

Notes

Austin's story about him being bullied is a true story :( Here's the link! He's such a great guy that's been through so much, it's hard to not love him!

Anyway, this chapter is sort of just a filler to transition from that bad part of what Hazel's been going through to start to show things might just start to look up! Sure, she'll always be haunted, but happier times to come(:

Let me know what you think! I love all you guys!