Once again I woke up after dreaming about Him. I’ve given him the nickname Him, since I have no idea who he is. This time it was just him on stage. Which made me wonder if it could be that he was a musician like Ian? Was it that I had an affair with him? Since I dreamt about him, and us having sex? I sighed and looked around. I didn’t want to watch a movie… I didn’t feel like anything actually.

I stroked my small baby bump and walked out to the kitchen. Ian was there, to my surprise, and he was doing food. He looked sad. Very sad. “Babe, are you thinking about Spot again?” I asked. But he shook his head.
"I found your phone, I put it on your nightstand…" He said. I looked at him, and he gave me a small smile.
“Nah, I have to go. Get some food in you and then go see if you can figure out your password for your phone” he said and kissed the top of my head. “I love you, remember that” he whispered before he got out.

I picked up the phone and I had tons of messages and missed calls. And without me realizing my fingers moved by theirselves and unlocked the phone. I had missed calls from my mother, my father, someone named Tino and a lot of missed calls from one named Austin. That was the name Ian had mentioned a few weeks, almost two months, ago at the hospital… Who was he?
I gasped when I saw my background. It was a picture of me, next to the man from my dreams. We were in bed and you couldn’t see his face but I recognized the tattoos and the scar on his chest. That was Him.
He was worried about me and asked me to call him. He missed me. He wanted to be with me. He hoped I would remember him. He loved me. And the last message was from two weeks ago. After that… Nothing. I decided to check the messages from Tino and I got surprised. He was… Family. Why hadn’t Ian mentioned him? With trembling hands I pressed the call button and a few signals went by before someone answered.
“Rin?” The unfamiliar voice said.
“Are you… Tino?” I asked, and my voice trembled. I could hear him breathing.
“You still doesn’t remember?” He said. I swallowed.
“I’m sorry, it was a mistake to call” i said and hung up.

I was crying, for some reason, and my body was trembling. Who was he? And more important… Who was the man from my dreams?

I took a deep breath and I opened up the map to look at my pictures. I could see Ian on a few but my body froze when I saw a picture, no it was a video, of Him. It was small but I could see that it was him. I opened it and I saw him from behind and I heard my own voice.
”say something" i said he turned around and gasped. the brown eyes. the black hair. the tattoos. and this time face as well. I trembled and he gave me the biggest smile.
“I love you Rin" he said, and just like a punch in the face everything came back. I cried out and fell back, down on the floor and hit my back. I let out a loud groan and saw flashes of all my memories pass before my eyes. When everything was back and I just laid there I felt disgusted. Ian for fuck sake… And Austin. Oh my god. Austin… Then I remembered that I was pregnant and I gasped. I sat up and stared at my baby bum. I was pregnant. And it was not Ian’s child. It was Austin’s. Oh my god. I let out a scream and a cry because everything was so fucked up. Everything was more than fucked up.

I packed a small bag and left Miami as soon as I could, and when I landed in California I went immediately went to Austin’s place. I knocked really hard on the door and rang the bell like crazy. Soon I heard footsteps and the door opened. There stood a girl, in underwear and long, brown hair. She looked at me. Confused and a little bit irritated.
“Can I help you?” She asked.
“Ehm… Is Austin home?” I asked, and soon after Austin came and he was only dressed in a pair of boxer briefs.
“Hey, who is it?” He asked and then he saw me. His face dropped and he just stared at me.
“Rin” he said.
“I came here because I thought you still wanted me, but I guess I was wrong” i said and looked at the girl.
“Rin wait” he said when I turned around.
“No Austin, don’t… You couldn’t even fight for me” I said.
“I called you every fucking day… And you never answered” he said.
“Because Ian had my phone, said it was gone and then he gave it to me the other day because of guilt and… I only needed to see your fucking face and hear your voice from on a video on my phone to get all my memories back” I said and tears was streaming down my face. Austin looked surprised. Never would he had known it would take so little.
“He told me I didn’t have a family, he never mentioned you… He hid my phone and now I know why he felt so much guilt when we found out that I was…” I stopped myself and just shook my head.
“Found out what?” Austin asked.
“Nothing” I sobbed and started to walk away.
“RIN” Austin called but I kept on walking.
“Ehm… Who was that?” The girl asked.

I cried in my apartment and I kept getting calls from Tino, and I kept getting calls from Austin. But I just lost it when Ian called me. He actually had the guts to call. I answered him jsut as Tino walked in through my front door.
"YOU ACTUALLY DARE TO CALL ME IAN?!" I screamed and sobbed out loudly. Tino looked really shocked.
"Rin, please… i’m sorry i just…" Ian said.
"DON’T YOU SORRY ME… YOU MADE ME FUCKING BELIEVE YOU WERE MY BOYFRIEND… YOU MADE ME FORGET ABOUT AUSTIN, YOU KEPT ME FROM MY FAMILY AND TOLD ME THAT MY FUCKING PHONE WAS GONE" I screamed and fell down to my knees.
"Don’t scream, it’s not good for the baby" he said.
"AND SINCE WHEN DID YOU CARE ABOUT THE BABY IAN? that is the only reason you gave me the phone back, because you wanted a way out now that you knew that i was pregnant… and it was Austin’s and you couldn’t possibly keep up the lie when I would give birth to it" I cried. Tino just stared at me. Really, really shocked by the news. Then I threw the phone into the wall and it smashed into pieces.
"Rin, you’re… pregnant?" Tino asked. i looked at him, completely broken. Destroyed and… broken.
"Yes" I cried and he hurried over to me and pulled me into his arms.
"You have to tell Austin" he said.
"I was there earlier… He didn’t care, he got himself a new chick" I sobbed.
"He didn’t care?" Tino said, fairly surprised.
"I stood there, and this girl opened… and he tried to stop me but… I just couldn’t" I cried.
"What are you going to do now?" he asked.
"I’m leaving California for a while, to calm myself down and find myself" I cried. Tino hushed me and stroked my hair.
"And where will you go?" he asked.
"I don’t know… I can’t go to Manhattan, I’ll probably be killed there… I can’t go to Miami because there’s Ian… Austin’s here in California" I cried and didn’t know what to do. I had no fucking idea what to do.
"Is there any city or pace you would like to go to? Where you now you can stay for a while?" Tino asked. I looked at him and then a small thought grew in my mind.
"Seattle…" I whispered.
"Do you wanna go to Seattle then?" he asked, and smiled a little. I nodded and he wiped away tears from my face.
"I have a few weeks off, I’ll come with you" he said and helped me up on my feet.