The Coco Quinn Guide

If I made one single mistake in my life that was for even a second trusting Mike Fuentes. Such an amateur move and it really proves that I am a few crumbs short of a full biscuit. I could have stood on my tip toes – or even on a box – and said, ‘no Mike, I don’t need nor do I want that Easter egg which honestly is probably over a year old’. But of course I didn’t. Me being a total fatty I am, I ran in the direction of the old, way past the sell by date chocolate covered in silver foil.
To explain how I made the worst mistake of my life, possibly one of the worst mistakes any person has ever made – Custer deciding to charge into battle wasn’t that bad, right? – I must take you back. I shall take you back to dull, overcast Wednesday morning, this morning to be exact. I was walking from the library and headed outside to meet Tony and Ana.
But at the end of the corridor I saw Mike and Jaime. I was quite a distance away so how did I know it was definitely them? Quite simple really. Mike Fuentes was so noticeable. It wasn’t his devilish good looks which personally I find over rated or his sexy, flicky look at me hair. He was easily the tallest boy in our grade. Literally head and shoulders above everyone else. I can count the number of times I’ve been in a close proximity to him on one hand but I can hazard a guess that he’s a good half a body taller than me. And how did I spot Jaime Preciado? Who can miss that ridiculous, blonde streaked hairstyle?
“Coco!” Mike called. I could’ve ran. I should’ve ran. But did I? Oh, of course not. That would be the sensible thing to do. The normal thing. Instead I walked over to meet them. I’m still questioning why. “What did you hear?” Mike asked.
“Me?” I asked.
“Yes, you,” he rolled his eyes. “I can’t see anyone else. Can you?”
“How much did you hear, Coco?” Jaime asked me.
“Everything?” I offered.
“Really?” Mike asked.
At this point I could have been honest and said no. “Yes. Everything.” I said confidentially. Jaime was looking around in a panic. It brings me to wonder what they were actually talking about.
“She heard everything!” Jaime exclaimed.
“She won’t talk.” Mike snorted.
“I won’t?” I asked.
“You will?” Jaime gasped.
“I will.”
“Mike, we’ll have to kill her! I don’t want to kill Coco.” Jaime rushed.
“We don’t need to kill her,” he laughed. “We can just cut out her tongue.” My mouth snapped closed and I frowned. Jaime’s eyes were wide and he hit Mike lightly. “Relax, I was joking.” He sighed. “We just need to offer her something in exchange for her silence.”
“She’s a girl. What do girls like?”
“Boys, clothes and chocolate.” Mike explained.
“We’re boys.” Jaime stated.
“Not us. Girls like those dreamy, blonde guys. Like Leonardo DiCaprio.”
“She already has clothes too.” Jaime added.
“I’m still here.” I reminded them. I should have just legged it.
“What about this?” Mike asked me. Then out of nowhere he pulled out an Easter egg out of his pocket. Then as if in slow motion he slowly started to unfurl her foil wrappings, seductively revealing some chocolate goodness which honestly made me feel all hot and bothered inside. Then he teasingly started to eat it right in front of me. I don’t know what it was but in that moment I wanted nothing more than to eat that chocolate egg.
“Give it to me!” I rushed.
“Sorry,” Mike said and ate every last bit. Even the foil. “There’s more.”
“Where?” I asked.
“In that janitors cupboard.” He said and nodded towards a door. “That’s where we found it, right Jaime?”
“Oh yeah.” Jaime nodded.
I started walking over to the cupboard and opened the door. I stepped inside and looked around. But then I groaned when they pushed me in there and locked the door. Of course. I heard running footsteps and sighed. I got up to switch on the light and much to my dismay found no Easter eggs. There was just toilet paper and dust, which is my enemy. Dust that is, not toilet paper.
There was no getting out so I decided to sit down on the floor. I instantly regretted it. I’ll most likely need two baths tonight. I feel filthy. I will have to eat toilet paper too. There’s no way I’ll get out of here. One time I was playing a game with Mike and he tied me to a tree. He forgot all about me and I didn’t get free for six hours. As for Jaime he’s no saviour. It’s common knowledge that he’s as much use as a chocolate teapot.
“I can’t believe you locked my sister in a storage cupboard!” I heard Kellin yell. I think my hero has arrived, and he wears denim on denim.
“It’s such a stupid thing to do. You could have hurt Coco.” Vic added. Ahh of course Vic would be with him. Kellin and Vic are attached at the hip.
“We only pushed her in.” Mike defended.
“What if she got hurt? Or worse.” Vic asked.
“What do you mean or worse?” Jaime asked.
“He means dead.” Mike answered.
“I swear you pair of idiots, if you’ve killed my sister you’re paying for a new one.” Gee, thanks for the love Kellin.
So to show them a lesson and to prove a point that it isn’t nice to push unsuspecting girls in cupboards after tricking them I decided to prank them back. I heard the door open and I lay down quickly, with my eyes closed and my limbs heavy and lifeless. This has to be my best idea since the dream catcher empire.
“Oh my God!” Jaime exclaimed.
“What did you do to her?” Kellin asked like he was asking someone to pass him his History textbook – bored and extremely disinterested.
“Nothing!” Mike sighed. “It must have happened inside the cupboard.”
“She’s dead and it’s all our fault!” Jaime panicked. “She must have hit her head! Or maybe there was some chocolate in there and she ate it and it was poison! Or she choked! I’ve killed her.” I think he’s crying.
“Shut up.” Vic muttered.
“I’m going to jail! I can’t. It would kill my mother and I’d be a two time murderer. She’d cry, damn it she’d cry. There would be tears everywhere and we’d need to build an ark. I can’t find two of every animal!” Jaime rushed.
“Is he prone to panic attacks?” Kellin asked curiously.
“Apparently so.” Mike said. “But I hate to burst your bubble but she’s breathing.”
“She’s what?” Kellin asked. He sounds rather disappointed.
“Breathing.” Mike said simply.
I suddenly stood up and everyone gasped. All accept Jaime. He screamed. You heard that right, just like a girl. I backed Mike up against the wall and grabbed his shirt. I glared up at him and felt Kellin touch my shoulder.
“No, Pop-“ he tried using his nickname for me but I stopped him.
I turned to Mike and saw him smiling. Mike was also so hard to read. Cold even. Nothing at all seemed to faze him. Vic was so different. I know him quite well because of him always being with Kellin. Vic was almost like an open book. Mike on the other hand…
“What are you smiling at?” I snapped.
“You’re stupid and it’s funny.” He teased.
“I- I well-“ I stuttered.
“I thought you were tough,” Mike tutted. “But you’re just like every other girl here.”
What? I am not! My mom says I’m special! “It doesn’t matter what you think,” I replied with fake confidence. “Because I pity you, Mike.” I huffed and backed away. Then I walked outside, my hips wriggling and feeling Mike glaring daggers into my back. I didn’t look back though. I was too cool for that.

Notes

Hello friends.

I know I left but I have news! I was searching through my laptop and came across a few stories I'd written. I'd hate them to go to waste and I really think you'd all enjoy them. They have a funny Nel/Zee feel to them with a side of What Happens In Vegas humour.

I'd love some feedback. I know a lot of the stories on this site a quite morbid so hopefully mine makes you smile. Has anyone missed me? I missed a lot of you!

Enjoy!

xoxo