Death's Whispers

I hear The Divine Infection. I groan and get up. I turn my alarm off. Oh shit! Today's the day! I grab all my shit, including the drawings and shove them into my Supernatural bag. I bought 6 tickets. Everyone else had already bought their tickets. I get dressed in this. What? I like bands, jeez bitches. And I want to die in my favorite clothes. Is that so wrong? No, no it's not so fuck it.
I do my make up which consists of winged eyeliner, glossy black lipstick, and black smokey eye shadow to make my pale, nearly white irises pop. Hey, I'm already pale like a fucking vampire. I apply a smudge of blue eyeliner above the black and I'm set. Perfect. I'm glad Kaylina knows how to drive and is old enough. I'm glad my bracelets cover up the scars and cuts on my wrists and arms. The rest are covered.
I call Kaylina and she says she'll be here in five. Perfect. I hear a honk about three minutes later. I smile and run downstairs. Mum slaps me in the face, she does this every morning. But this time, she did it a lot harder. Hard enough to send me sprawling on the floor. I run out the door before my mum can make me want to shoot myself and other people in the head any more. I hop into the car. "You look amazing!" I scream in excitement. Kaylina is wearing this. She smirks.
"I know. You look fabulous though you have a slight gothic look to you, nothing major though." Kaylina says with a smile. She knows why I'm wearing this. She knows what's going to happen. And she understands why I have to do it. She had tried to stop me but I sat he down and explained it to her.
"Let's go! We don't have long to get there!" I say. She chuckles and drives. I fall asleep with my head leaning against the window.
Time Lapse
"Kaitlynn, Kaitlynn wake up. Girl we're hear!" I jolt up. I look around scared and disoriented for a second. I smile and hop out the car. We go to the stage and show our V.I.P. passes. The security guards check them and let us pass. I squeal as we go backstage. I stand behind Kaylina the entire time. The bands come up and meet us. They try to shake my hand but I kinda freak out and wave. They look at me weird. I look down as my cheeks flood and mumble an apology.
Kaylina hugs me and explains my anxiety and some other issues to them, nothing too personal. They all nod in understanding. One by one they on stage. We watch them perform from the stage. I scream my lungs out. I laugh a lot. Wow. So this is what happiness feels like. Fuck, it feels amazing.
Finally, after the last band plays, it's time for them to go out onto the venue and sigh shit. We follow them outside. We wait in each line. I get my shirt signed by every band and band member. They shake my hand. I hand them my drawings to each particular band and scurry off. I don't want to see their horrified and disgusted faces once they see my drawings. On the back of each one, I wrote: Sorry they're so shitty ~Kaitlynn.
Finally, I go to the you tubers and meet them. I shake hands with them with my head bowed. They all scare the shit out of me by giving me a group hug. I look up with wide, terrified eyes and they gasp. I presume at my repulsiveness. I hurriedly bow my head again and hand them their portraits. I scurry off into a bathroom. I look in the mirror and gasp.
A big black, blue, and purple bruise in the shape of my mother's hand stands out in stark contrast against my pale face. Shit! I hope they didn't see it...but they probably did. Why do I get the feeling that all my idols saw my arms? I grab my phone and text Kaylina that I'm leaving and doing it now. She texts back, asking me why. I take a picture of my face and send it to her along with an explanation of how it got there in the first place. She never texts back. But then again, I don't check my phone. I'm running out the bathroom and far away. Into the woods apparently. I remember these woods from my childhood.
I run off to my sanctuary. A clearing with the tallest tree in the entire woods in the middle and a lake right next to it. I grab my razors and the sleeping pills out of my bag. I use the lake water to take the entire bottle of pills with. These things work really fast so I need to start cutting. It;s my fail-safe. I drag the razor all along my arms, legs, thighs, everywhere. I can since I'm only in my panties, bra, and sports bra. My ribs show for my stomach is sunken in. The bruises and everything stand out like a beacon on my white flesh. Blood runs down my skin and pools on the ground. I swear I hear someone calling my name before I sink into welcomed blackness, into the void.

Notes

..eh..still shitty. Seems rushed. I'll probably revise and edit it later.