A Recollection of Ideas: A Series of One Shots

I was sitting in a coffee shop, staring out the window at the dreary clouds. It was so rainy, so depressing. Actually, it reflected my mood perfectly. I rested my head in my hands and took a shuddery breath.

I didn’t want to go on. By that, I mean I didn’t want to live anymore.

What’s the point of it? Seriously, what is it? My mom is dead, my dad does drugs, my sister died in a car accident, I moved across the country when I was eight, right after her death, the kids at my school hated me because my hair was dyed blue at the tips. I left all my childhood friends behind and they look like they had forgotten me. I had nothing left. I had nothing left to try to live for. I might as well die. No one would miss me. My dad was passed out half the time. Nothing left. And besides, no one would miss me. I was completely useless. I don’t talk to anyone.

Actually, I revise that last statement. I talk to one person, the only one who would talk to me. There was a website online that I tried out a while ago. It was a site that you could go on and post the music you listen to. It was kind of like a Facebook, but for music fans that were considered ‘emo’ and listen to ‘emo’ bands like Pierce the Veil, Of Mice and Men, etc…

I had gotten on it three months ago and had a few people check out my page but only one person had ever commented on it.

DrummerBoy: You listen to PTV?

And that was the comment that started it all. I had responded happy for someone to take an interest in the music I liked. I had posted that I was listening to their Collide with the Sky album earlier that day. We talked every day and I couldn’t help but slowly fall in love with this guy. I mean, he had no clue who it was, but I loved that he started the conversation instead of making me initiate the conversation like other people. And he would ask me questions and say that I had a great taste in music.

Lately, it had been more conversational over the messages. I looked back up to my laptop, hoping for a message. I sighed. Nothing. Clicking through, I looked at older messages.

DrummerBoy: How are you today?
MechanicalBride: As good as usual. Nothing much. Dad’s still asleep.
DrummerBoy: Oh, did he get drunk last night?

Yeah, yeah, I told him about my dad and my family. What was the chances of ever meeting him? Slim to none. I didn’t think he’d care, but turns out, he was one of the most caring people I’d ever known, even if I didn’t see him in personal.

MechanicalBride: Yeah, he did. I had to lock myself in my room. It’s just so hard sometimes. I wanted to walk out of the house and not come back.
DrummerBoy: Hold on, sweetie cause darling you’ll be okay. <3

This morning, I had swooned over the message. He had quoted PTV and complimented me. This boy had charm. He was always calling me darling and sweetheart and telling me that I’m beautiful, even though he’s never seen me.

I took a sip of my coffee, looking up for a message. Still none. We were literally just talking! Where did he go? Maybe he left. Yes, maybe he had other things to do. I shouldn’t be worried about this guy. He wouldn’t be worried about me.

The longer the minutes passed, the more hopeless I felt. An idea popped in my mind. You know, I’ve been staying here, staying alive just because I wanted to talk to this guy. He’s been the reason I’ve been alive this long, just so I could talk to him, so I wouldn’t go insane.

You know, maybe he wouldn’t notice if I popped off for a few hours…or days…or years…

The bell rang as someone popped through the door. The small café was fairly unpopulated and unpopular. It was probably just one of the regulars of the area. I closed my laptop half way, staring out the window again, looking at the cliffs just behind the café. They were just out of sight that no one would see if I jumped off into the ocean.

“Hey, I like your shirt.” A man pointed out. I looked up long enough for my eyes to widen. It was MIKE FUENTES! Pierce the Veil’s drummer was sitting right across from me!

“T-thanks.” I stuttered. He looked down at the seat at the large table, pointing to it.

“Is it open?” He asked. I nodded, choked up with words catching at the back of my throat. He smiled and sat down, setting up a laptop in front of him. I looked back at my own laptop, trying to act casually. Within minute of the awkward silence, a notification popped up.

DrummerBoy: Sorry I was off. I had no wifi and I had to set up at a place with internet connection.

I sighed in relief. Thank goodness he got back on. I still had to decide what to do. Should I just walk off? Should I say goodbye first? What do I need to do?

MechanicalBrides: No worries! I’m just at a café with nice wifi. Try the cafes. They have great connection :)

I sighed while waiting for a reply. I peeked over my laptop to Mike. He was concentrated on whatever was on his laptop. I couldn’t see it but didn’t want to be nosy. Instead, I stood up and threw away my coffee.

DrummerBoy: Yeah, that’s where I am now. I’m sitting across the cute girl. She scrunches up her nose when she’s focused. It’s adorable.

My face fell the instant that I saw that comment. Oh. Oh. Oh. Good for him…I mean, he should be happy and not have to think of me. Why did I EVER think there was any hope between us? We probably weren’t even in the same state! I never thought to ask and now…here’s my answer. Great. I sighed, staring at my screen and attempting not to cry.

MechanicalBrides: Oh, that’s great for you! You should totally ask her out ;)
DrummerBoy: I’m really nervous! She’s really cute and oh no…she looks sad.
MechanicalBrides: Go for it! Make her day! She’ll cheer up if she sees you.

I ducked my head lower into my keyboard so that Mike wouldn’t see me wipe away a tear. He would have a girl. He wouldn’t care. Oh well. You know what? I’ll just go now. It sounds like a great idea, a great escape right now. I need to get it all over with, just to end my life.

DrummerBoy: Hey, what are you doing today? Listening to more PTV albums?
MechanicalBrides: Maybe…I think I might go for a swim…
DrummerBoy: Oh no, when you use a lot of periods, that’s your sad typing. What’s wrong?
MechanicalBrides: I’m sorry, I just can’t do this anymore. Good luck with your girl. I hope all goes well for you. She’ll kill to be with a stud like you.

I stopped typing for a moment to sniffle loud enough for Mike to look up. He was anxious looking. I ducked my head back to my laptop.

“Are you okay?” He asked me. I nodded and put on my fakest smile.

“Of course.” And with that I went back to typing.

DrummerBoy: Where are you going? Please, please tell me what’s wrong.
MechanicalBrides: I’m sorry. I just can’t hold on anymore. This music gave me hope. You kept on talking me out of it, and you didn’t even know it. I just don’t think I can keep on going. Thanks for being awesome and the only friend I had.

I finished, wiping away the tears. I checked the streets. They were all empty. The waves were crashing just over the edge of the cliffs. All I had to do was hop a fence and I would be right on the edge. All I had to do was jump and I would be over it…

I checked one more time, looking at Mike. He looked seriously concerned. Maybe I should ask him what’s wrong. No, he would be fine.

DrummerBoy: No, no, please don’t do this. You’re a special person. I’m not going to let you do this. Please stay here, if for no one else, me. Please, just stay here long enough. I’ll come see you. We can talk. Please, just be with me.
MechanicalBrides: You’re an awesome person, DrummerBoy. Keep on rocking on. I’m going for that swim now. There are some cliffs and I think that would be an excellent spot. I’ll see you in a long while.

With that, I stood up, pushing back my chair. I watched as the little symbol popped up saying he read it. Mike put his head in his hands.

“Mike?” I asked. He looked up, his hands shaking, as if he saw something terribly frightening.

“Oh yes, dear?” He asked, more like choked out.

“Would you please watch my laptop? I’m going over by the cliffs. I’ll be back later.” I smiled at him. I felt at ease. All this pain was going to end. I didn’t have to deal with this anymore.

“The cliffs?” He choked out. I nodded and walked off, quickly leaving the shop. I saw Mike go over to my laptop, looking at the screen. Normally, I would be ticked off because someone was reading all my stuff, but now, I was just at ease. Read what he wants. It means nothing to him.

I turned the corner, going to the fence. The west coast cliffs were sharp and jagged, dipping towards the sea. I felt the salty wind touch my tongue and smiled. I will end it all and it will be good.

Hoping the fence, I went past the sidewalk to the railing at the cliffs. No one was out on this rainy day. The drops splattered against my hair. I leaned over the railing, watching gulls duck and dive below me. The waves viciously bit at the slanted rock. I sighed, putting one foot up on the railing. All it would take is a little dive to the waves over fifty feet below. Hopefully, the water would be shallow. I wanted a quick exit, not one where I was drowning.

I took another step onto the railing, steadying myself. Standing up straight, I closed my eyes, taking in the breath of air. All I had to do was swing myself over, take a step, and fall…

“STOP!” Someone yelled. I opened my eyes. Before I knew it, a pair of arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me off. They were strong and firm, but full of caring tenderness. I struggled against the arms. They held me down and pulled me to the sidewalk, where they let me go and blocked my path to the cliffs. I glared at Mike Fuentes, the man that took me away from my chance.

“Please, step aside. I was admiring the cliffs.” I pointed out, doing my best to lie through the tears that were threatening to spill.

“No, you were going to throw yourself over the edge of the cliff. Don’t argue, because I know.” He stated firmly, jutting his chin in the air. I paused a moment, tilting my head.

“Wait, how did you know?” I asked in a soft voice.

“Because I talked to you.”

“We didn’t discuss this at the café.”

“Oh, but we did.” He pointed, red ringing his eyes. I froze. When did we…..wait….no, no this isn’t possible. This can’t be possible.

“DrummerBoy?” I asked softly.

“MechanicalBrides, I won’t let you kill yourself. Not today, not now, not ever.” He choked out. I stood there, letting the tears fall down my cheeks as he slowly wrapped his arms around me, holding me tightly to his chest. He cried with me.

“Y-your DrummerBoy.” I whispered over and over.

“Come on, you’re coming with me.” He said after he wiped away my tears with a gentle hand. I followed him. My dad wouldn’t notice me disappearing, or he just wouldn’t care. I could leave for days and he wouldn’t lift a finger.

“Where are we going?” I asked him.

“From what you told me about your home life, I’m taking you with me.” He wrapped an arm around my shoulder, taking me back to the café. I sighed, leaning in. I still couldn’t believe this.

Mike Fuentes was DrummerBoy.

Now the whole PTV comments, drumming username, it all made sense.

“Are we going home?” I asked him. He nodded.

“You’re living with me for a while. No arguments.” He put firmly. I nodded as we retrieved our stuff and walked back to his car. I hopped in the passenger seat as he took off.

An hour later, we arrived at his home. He was just outside the city. I walked behind him as he went into the house. Mike showed me where I was staying, led me around the tour of the small house, and let me sit down on the couch while he fixed us a snack. He came back in a few minutes with a bowl of popcorn. He took off his snapback and tossed it into a random corner. I scrunched up my nose. He laughed.

“What?” I asked him. He flicked my nose. I leaned away from him, really smiling for the first time today.

“You’re cute when you scrunch up your nose.” He commented and sat down next to me. I snickered at him and ate popcorn while he changed channels over and over again. I made him stop on the Discovery channel.

“Mythbusters!” I cheered. He yawned.

“All they do is explode stuff!” He complained. I took my turn and flicked his nose. He pouted.

“Exactly!”

“Good point.” He muttered. I leaned back into the cushions, feeling the emotions of hopelessness and despair fade and be replaced with comfort and security.

While Jamie was talking about science and stuff, Mike wrapped his arms around his shoulder. I leaned into his side. I felt his eyes bore into my face. I gave him a sideways glance.

“What?” I asked.

“I never got your name.”

“It’s Reyven.” I nodded.

“That’s a cool name.” He admired. I muttered a thanks and went back to watching the show. Half way through, the noise and the rain was making me feel sleepy. I restrained a yawn. This day had been emotionally exhausting and I just wanted to sleep. Mike noticed me and set the popcorn bowl on the table.

“Tired?” He asked. I nodded. He picked me up and moved me onto his lap.

“Woah!” I gasped as he held me tightly. I gave him an odd looks.

“What, Reyven?”

“I’m guessing you’re the stereotypical pretty-boy-bad-boy flirt?” I asked. He shrugged with a sideways smirk.

“Maybe, but when I find someone I care about, I’m faithful.”

“Oh really? Have you found that lucky girl yet?” I asked. He nodded, grinning down at me. I opened my mouth to say something, realized what the look meant, and looked down. The heat was rushing to my cheeks.

“They have a tendency to fall into my lap.” He shrugged. I snuggled up into his chest. I was always wondering what DrummerBoy looked like, what he acted like. Now that I had a first account…I can say that I like what I see.

“Sure, they just ‘fall’ in.” I mumbled into his neck, curling up against his tattoos. He hummed in pleasure. It vibrated off of his chest. He rubbed little circles into my back, his finger then tracing light lines up and down my spine. He turned his head, nuzzling against my cheek. The action felt warm and comforting. He kissed the hollow behind my ear, making me shiver in pleasure. He reached up, stroking my cheek, as if he was making sure I was real. It all felt like a dream to me.

“You’re beautiful, I hope you know that.” He cooed into my ear. My eyelids fluttered closed. I just hummed an ‘okay’ to him and went back to drifting off. His thumbs gently stroked my closed eyelids, brushing over every smooth part of my face. His tender actions made me feel loved and cared for. He ran his fingers through my long hair, untangling it in the gentlest manner possible.

“I’m hungry.” I mumbled.

“I just got you popcorn.” He chuckled.

“I know but I’m hungry.”

“What do you want?”

“I don’t know.” I mumbled, leaning up against his hand that caressed my cheek, letting him know that I loved it.

“Okay, let me go look.” He moved. I held on tighter.

“NO!”

“But I thought you wanted food!”

“Yeah but I love this more.” I snuggled up to his chest. He laughed and lay back, settling me against his chest. He resumed to make me sleepy under his loving touch.

“Yeah, I love this more to.” He murmured.

Notes

This lovely little piece is written for AlyxxBarakat! I hope you love it, dear!

Don't forget to keep on requesting one shots! I hope you like them enough to want one :)