memories.

Setting her phone on the music dock, Dakota does the two thing she does best; ignoring her problems and making art.

She sets up her paints, carefully dipping the brush in a small cup of blue paint. She puts all of her emotions in the painting. It isn’t anything in particular, but the image she sees in her mind is more of a icy tower looking place. The canvas is halfway covered when a song comes on that makes her laugh bitterly.

“Pick up the phone.
Answer your text.
Well, I apologize about last night -
I really did not mean to disrespect.”

Her brush drags slowly across the canvas, mixing silver and yellow hues with each other. She hums along as she works.

“You,
You better be alone.
No, I'm not obsessed.
But if I catch you with somebody else
You know that I am gonna be upset.”

True, true. She thinks. The thought of Alan with another girl makes her sick to her stomach. Images of some girl pressed up against an angry Alan circle her brain and she quickly skips songs on her phone, making the apartment fill with the harmonic voice of Jeremy McKinnon.

She plops down on her bed, sighing.

Your blade. It’s right in the bathroom. An easy fifteen steps away at most. You could just do one little cut. Just a tiny one to make you-

No! She jolts up straight, popping the elastic hair tie she always keeps on her wrist.

She grabs her notebook off the small table she had been using as a desk, desperate for anything to keep her mind off the little piece of metal calling her name.

She scribbles down her thoughts in a lyrical form, her pen smearing as her hand brushes on the not quite dry parts of the paper.

At least thirty minutes later she has a song. Guitar suggestions, lyrics, everything.

She frowns as she reads over the lyrics, realising how her self destructive mood reflected in her writing.

Two lines in particular catch her eye. “It’s hard to force air through these blackened lungs when the razors sing my name / when the sound of a bullet doubles as a sweet, sweet lullaby”

Her pencil tapping against the paper suddenly increases in tempo. Cole, she decids, taking a deep breath. I need Cole.

She calls the man who was rapidly coming her best friends number, not quite thinking about how most normal people wouldn’t be up at 3 in the morning when they have to work the next day.

“Hello?” His groggy voice answers and she practically sighs in relief. “Are you awake enough to talk?” There’s a pause and she assumes he’s stretching or something.

“Yeah, anytime, Sunshine. What’s up?”

“Alan found out about my self harm and I kinda flipped shit when he told me he wanted to fix me and I’m really scared that I’ve lost him which is crazy because I’ve only known him for like a month.” Her words blur together as she rushes through her worry.

One night after a few too many shots of Jim Beam, Cole and Dakota had spilled their cutting habits to each other.

Cole exhales slowly, thinking over what he should tell her.

“What exactly did you say?” She sits for a moment, trying to recall exactly what she had said. “I said ‘I don’t need your help’ he said something like, ‘I guess I’ll leave’ and when I told him to get out then and he replies with ‘Call me when you’re done being a bitch’.”

“Woah. Well, that was out of line.” Not knowing if he was talking about her or Alan, she makes an agreeable sound. She had over reacted a bit, but still.

“Do you think I should text him?” Cole chuckles and she pulls a confused face, even though he can’t see it.

“Na, Sunshine. He’s been at my house since your fight and you’re on speaker.”

“Cole!” She shrieks, rocketing from her seat on the bed. “You’re such an ass!”

“Yes, but you love me for it.Now I’m gonna let you talk to loverboy. Laters!” There is a slight rustling sound as he hands the phone to Alan.

“Hey, baby.” “Hey,” she sighs out, cradling her cheek in her hand.

“I’m sorry.” They both say at the same time. The pair laughs, some of the awkwardness falling away.

“Wanna meet at our spot?” She smiles at the question, shaking her head. “Do you really have to ask?”

Notes

Two chapter in one day! Woop woop!