The Calm
Chapter 65
-Austin’s POV-
Of all the times I’ve messed up, this by far is the worst. She’s staying with Brook and Alan. Then here I am still doing drugs because it makes me numb. I’m not doing as much as I did that day though. I don’t know what Scar did to have a nurse come and take care of me no questions asked.
Are Scar and I still playing that sick game of who can mess up and leave? I’m so fucking stupid. She won’t deal with me anymore probably, and hell I can’t even blame her.
I feel numb. The only hope is her and if I want to stop this addiction, I need her to help me.
Maybe it is time to be a man and take responsibility for all the damage I’ve done. It’s time to make the girl mine forever and get back to work. It’s not like I don’t have anything to do, so why am I wasting my life away?
Scarlett deserves better then me though. She forgives me so easily. I love her so much that I trust her enough to want to marry her. Though, her saying yes now may never be a thing. Hell, me being her boyfriend may never be a thing.
I need to see her. I need to make this right. I need to tell her that I need her help. I’m crawling out of this hole that I fell into. I have something to fight for. Scarlett. She’s my life. If I get her, then the world will turn correctly again.
I can’t forget the hell I’ve put Alan through. He’s always cleaning up my messes and he doesn’t deserve it.
Brook now has to be a part of it too since Scar is staying there. I mean she couldn’t go to Erin and Tony’s because I would be pushing daisies. My band is distant and to themselves, the only one who would help is Alan. That’s where she has to be. I have to go see her.
I must make this right.
-Alan’s POV-
For the past 3 days Brook and I can barely get Scarlett out of the guest room. This may have destroyed Scar more then anything he’s done. He was pretty much out for a suicide mission.
Brook’s so worried and it’s bad for the baby, but she says she’s fine. Part of me wants to kick Scar out and tell her to go to her apartment. She doesn’t feel safe though. She thinks Austin will come after her and I’m some kind of protection. I don’t even know why she’s afraid of Austin.
She told Erin she’s sick, which is always the lie Scarlett uses when something’s wrong. So hopefully Scar leaves my apartment before the angry Mexicans come and tear my door down. I’ve seen Tony pissed enough once, apparently her and Vic made friends, and let’s just say I don’t want them here.
I was going to go check on her until there was a knock at my door.
Please don’t be Tony. Please no. I looked through the peek hole. Oh shit.
It was Austin. Who looked like hell and was wearing sunglasses in a very dim hallway.
I opened the door slightly. “Aus, what are you doing here?” I asked dumbly.
“Can I see her?” He barely choked out the words, had he been crying?
“She’s not here Austin.” Such a lie, would he buy it?
“Alan, please, I need her.” I saw the tear run down his cheek, fuck now what.
“Austin, I told you…” I almost finished my sentence until Brook and Scar came out from the hallway and Austin saw them both. Mark me down for world’s worst liar.
“Scar” he said.
“Alan let him in.” Scar said firmly. So I did what she said. He came in and looked like hell, or even worst. It’s been 3 days what has happened to him?
He walked to her and she just looked at him. He didn’t bother to take off his sunglasses either. Brook sat on the couch and I decided to join her. We needed to watch but they needed to talk it out.
“Baby, I’m sorry. I need help. I need you to help me. Please Scar help me please.” He was begging with tears falling down his cheeks again. I did not want to be in Scarlett’s position right now.
“You know I can’t Austin. You need more then me to help you.” She was standing her ground, go Scarlett go.
Austin took off his sunglasses and set them in his shirt pocket. In all my years of knowing Austin, I’ve never seen his eyes look so bad, hell he looked almost dead. The dark bags under his eyes, the redness, the puffiness, he did not look like this 3 days ago. He was terrible looking. Scar gasped when she saw this. Brook had tears in her eyes. I sat dumbfounded about this whole situation.
“Oh my Austin.” Scar finally spoke as her voice was laced with tears.
“Help me. Please help me. I want you in my life and I’ll do anything.” He was now sobbing by the end of that.
“Austin, you’re going to have to go to rehab.” She said, holy shit Scarlett. I’m so proud of her for taking her stand.
“No, it will be made public and no, no I can’t!” he pleaded.
“Well Aus, I personally don’t give a fuck about your public reputation right now. You’re a mess! Honey how did you get this far? I’ve blamed myself for supplying you. We both know where you got some of the pills. I can’t help you. It’s too far Austin. You’re too far-gone. You need rehab Austin. Then we will have to see where things go…”
“No baby I need you now. Please.” Austin was a wreck.
“No Austin Robert Carlile. Listen here, you need to get you’re fucking shit together if you ever want to be in my life, correction our life again. I will not have this. I can’t it’s just not me anymore!” Scar said and we were all confused. Our life? What the fuck did that…oh shit.
Austin looked at her and started crying more. I don’t know if he figured it out or what.
“I’m pregnant Austin. At this rate you will never see your child. At this rate I will never want to marry you or have my child near its father. It’s not just me to worry about anymore.” She held her stomach at the end of that, the maternal instincts taking over.
Austin dropped to the ground and starting sobbing more. He knew he really fucked up now. I went to him as Scar stood there and cried.
Scarlett was pregnant with Austin’s child. Austin is too much of a disaster to handle anything let alone that. Scar just threatened to take the kid and pretty much run so that Austin couldn’t hurt it like he’s hurt her.
There’s one option Austin gets to try and fix this and I’m going to be the one who’s going to have to help him. He has to go to rehab.
Of all the times I’ve messed up, this by far is the worst. She’s staying with Brook and Alan. Then here I am still doing drugs because it makes me numb. I’m not doing as much as I did that day though. I don’t know what Scar did to have a nurse come and take care of me no questions asked.
Are Scar and I still playing that sick game of who can mess up and leave? I’m so fucking stupid. She won’t deal with me anymore probably, and hell I can’t even blame her.
I feel numb. The only hope is her and if I want to stop this addiction, I need her to help me.
Maybe it is time to be a man and take responsibility for all the damage I’ve done. It’s time to make the girl mine forever and get back to work. It’s not like I don’t have anything to do, so why am I wasting my life away?
Scarlett deserves better then me though. She forgives me so easily. I love her so much that I trust her enough to want to marry her. Though, her saying yes now may never be a thing. Hell, me being her boyfriend may never be a thing.
I need to see her. I need to make this right. I need to tell her that I need her help. I’m crawling out of this hole that I fell into. I have something to fight for. Scarlett. She’s my life. If I get her, then the world will turn correctly again.
I can’t forget the hell I’ve put Alan through. He’s always cleaning up my messes and he doesn’t deserve it.
Brook now has to be a part of it too since Scar is staying there. I mean she couldn’t go to Erin and Tony’s because I would be pushing daisies. My band is distant and to themselves, the only one who would help is Alan. That’s where she has to be. I have to go see her.
I must make this right.
-Alan’s POV-
For the past 3 days Brook and I can barely get Scarlett out of the guest room. This may have destroyed Scar more then anything he’s done. He was pretty much out for a suicide mission.
Brook’s so worried and it’s bad for the baby, but she says she’s fine. Part of me wants to kick Scar out and tell her to go to her apartment. She doesn’t feel safe though. She thinks Austin will come after her and I’m some kind of protection. I don’t even know why she’s afraid of Austin.
She told Erin she’s sick, which is always the lie Scarlett uses when something’s wrong. So hopefully Scar leaves my apartment before the angry Mexicans come and tear my door down. I’ve seen Tony pissed enough once, apparently her and Vic made friends, and let’s just say I don’t want them here.
I was going to go check on her until there was a knock at my door.
Please don’t be Tony. Please no. I looked through the peek hole. Oh shit.
It was Austin. Who looked like hell and was wearing sunglasses in a very dim hallway.
I opened the door slightly. “Aus, what are you doing here?” I asked dumbly.
“Can I see her?” He barely choked out the words, had he been crying?
“She’s not here Austin.” Such a lie, would he buy it?
“Alan, please, I need her.” I saw the tear run down his cheek, fuck now what.
“Austin, I told you…” I almost finished my sentence until Brook and Scar came out from the hallway and Austin saw them both. Mark me down for world’s worst liar.
“Scar” he said.
“Alan let him in.” Scar said firmly. So I did what she said. He came in and looked like hell, or even worst. It’s been 3 days what has happened to him?
He walked to her and she just looked at him. He didn’t bother to take off his sunglasses either. Brook sat on the couch and I decided to join her. We needed to watch but they needed to talk it out.
“Baby, I’m sorry. I need help. I need you to help me. Please Scar help me please.” He was begging with tears falling down his cheeks again. I did not want to be in Scarlett’s position right now.
“You know I can’t Austin. You need more then me to help you.” She was standing her ground, go Scarlett go.
Austin took off his sunglasses and set them in his shirt pocket. In all my years of knowing Austin, I’ve never seen his eyes look so bad, hell he looked almost dead. The dark bags under his eyes, the redness, the puffiness, he did not look like this 3 days ago. He was terrible looking. Scar gasped when she saw this. Brook had tears in her eyes. I sat dumbfounded about this whole situation.
“Oh my Austin.” Scar finally spoke as her voice was laced with tears.
“Help me. Please help me. I want you in my life and I’ll do anything.” He was now sobbing by the end of that.
“Austin, you’re going to have to go to rehab.” She said, holy shit Scarlett. I’m so proud of her for taking her stand.
“No, it will be made public and no, no I can’t!” he pleaded.
“Well Aus, I personally don’t give a fuck about your public reputation right now. You’re a mess! Honey how did you get this far? I’ve blamed myself for supplying you. We both know where you got some of the pills. I can’t help you. It’s too far Austin. You’re too far-gone. You need rehab Austin. Then we will have to see where things go…”
“No baby I need you now. Please.” Austin was a wreck.
“No Austin Robert Carlile. Listen here, you need to get you’re fucking shit together if you ever want to be in my life, correction our life again. I will not have this. I can’t it’s just not me anymore!” Scar said and we were all confused. Our life? What the fuck did that…oh shit.
Austin looked at her and started crying more. I don’t know if he figured it out or what.
“I’m pregnant Austin. At this rate you will never see your child. At this rate I will never want to marry you or have my child near its father. It’s not just me to worry about anymore.” She held her stomach at the end of that, the maternal instincts taking over.
Austin dropped to the ground and starting sobbing more. He knew he really fucked up now. I went to him as Scar stood there and cried.
Scarlett was pregnant with Austin’s child. Austin is too much of a disaster to handle anything let alone that. Scar just threatened to take the kid and pretty much run so that Austin couldn’t hurt it like he’s hurt her.
There’s one option Austin gets to try and fix this and I’m going to be the one who’s going to have to help him. He has to go to rehab.
Notes
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12/22/14