Like Loving A Lion (SEQUEL to I'm Not That Perfect)

The sun was setting and the nightlights were beginning to come on when I met Austin after his set. We wandered aimlessly around the day’s venue.
“So. You’ve been busy.” Austin stated amiably.
“Yeah, I guess. I’ve got a band and all.” I shrugged.
“It’s awesome that you’ve done so much. Congratulations.” He replied.
“Cut the small talk bullshit. Was there something specific you had in mind?” I raised my eyebrows, looking over at him.
“You haven’t changed one bit.” He chuckled, sitting on top of a nearby picnic table. I sat on the bench beside him. “I just. . . I really want to explain what happened that night.”
“We don’t have to do this-” I started.
“Yes, we do.” He said. “I don’t really know where to start. I left the hospital and I’d never been so fucked up in my life. I wanted that baby too, Avery. You’re the only person in the world who understands how much I wanted to meet him. And then I found out I wouldn’t ever get to. I went home and I drank and drank and drank and then when she called. . . when Josie called I fucked up bad. I wasn’t there for you and I will never forgive myself for that. I didn’t sleep with her either. You’ve got absolutely no reason to believe me but I didn’t.”
My eyes were very wet by the time he was done, and every part of my body was shaking. “You will. . . never. . . understand. . . what it was like. . . alone in that delivery room.”
“You left and I had a lot of time to think about what an awful person I was. Talk to me, Ave. Please.” He begged.
‘I-” I opened my mouth and tried to speak but all I could do was cry.
“Can I-” I nodded and Austin moved down beside me, putting one of his long arms around my shoulder gingerly. “It’s okay, Ave. Whenever you’re ready.”
“I tried to bury all of it for so long. It’s just weird to have to go through it fresh again.” I said slowly. “I don’t want to fight anymore.”
“Neither do I. Can you ever forgive me?” He asked timidly.
“You didn’t sleep with her?” I asked, looking over at him.
“No. No, I didn’t. It was one kiss, the one that you saw. The one that never should have happened.” He replied.
I could tell when he was lying- and he wasn’t. “I guess I owe you one after today anyways.”
“You and Radke, huh?” Austin asked without smiling.
“We’re not a thing.” I replied. Not that it was any of his business.
“He’s an asshole. I hate him, and I don’t hate many people.” He continued.
“I know.”
“Why do you even hang out with him?” He asked.
I laughed. “I didn’t really have anyone else.”
“Something he said today. . . Well, it’s bothering me.” Austin said, looking troubled.
“Just one thing?” I raised my eyebrows.
“One thing in particular. More than everything else. When you asked if he was going to hit you again and he said he might. He-”
“You were there for that?” I demanded.
“I heard it all.” He said carefully. “He just meant the time when you and I were together, right?”
“Of course.” I said automatically.
“You’re lying.”
“Am not!”
“Yeah. I can tell. Are we going to do this the easy way or the hard way?” He asked.
“Do you really even care?” I asked angrily.
Austin looked shocked. “Of course I care. Just because we’re not together anymore doesn’t mean I don’t care.”
“It only happened once, okay? We were both drunk and I pissed him off.” I said finally.
“Did you sleep with him?” He asked curiously.
I nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I did.”
“I could kill him for doing that.” He continued.
“I’m sure you could.”
“I don’t want to fight anymore, Ave.” He said quietly.
“Neither do I, Austin. Neither do I.”

Notes