Like Loving A Lion (SEQUEL to I'm Not That Perfect)

“It’s not fair, Chloe.” I sighed. “Why does he get one?”
She looked in the direction of my eyes; Ronnie and his baby. “Avery.”
“It’s not fair.” I repeated. “He gets one and I don’t? I lost my baby but a shithead like him gets one?”
“He is a shithead.” She agreed. “Why aren’t you eating?”
“I’m not hungry.” I sighed.
“You’re too skinny, Avery. You look ill.” She said.
“Thank you, Chloe.” I rolled my eyes.
Alan and Austin sat down beside Chloe and I, respectively. “Hi, ladies.” Alan said. “What are we talking about today? Nail polish? Tyra Banks? Tumblr?”
“How skinny Avery is.” Chloe answered. I glared at her.
“You have lost a lot of weight.” Austin said, looking at me.
“Can we get a different conversation topic please?” I asked.
“Did you hear what happened to Falling In Reverse? Kenny kicked them off the main stage, now they’re at Ernie Ball.” Alan laughed.
“Good.” Austin said. “He doesn’t deserve to play on main stage.”
“He’s really a shit dad.” I said, eyes glued to Ronnie and his daughter. “He doesn’t deserve her.”
“It’s not fair, is it?” Austin asked, watching them sadly.
Alan and Chloe looked at each other uneasily. We were probably making them nervous. “He gets that beautiful baby girl and what did we get? A boy who never even took a breath? It’s not fair.” I continued.
“We’re good people. Why does he get one when we don’t?” Austin asked.
**
“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck this shit!” I yelled. “Fuck you, Phil! You’re such a shithead! God, what the fuck!”
“I missed playing Call of Duty with you, Avery.” Phil replied.
“Shut the fuck up! You’re such a shithead!” I repeated, throwing the controller across the room and hitting Austin in the head.
“Ow.” Austin frowned.
“Sorry. Should I kiss it?” I asked. He nodded. I walked over and kissed his temple. “Better?”
“Avery, get over here. We’re losing because you’re playing house with Austin.” Tino said without moving his eyes from the screen. We were all on their bus playing video games; Tino and I versus Phil and Aaron.
“Did you detonate the bomb?” I asked, sitting back down and resuming the game.
“Yeah. It blew the fuck up.” He replied.
“Awesome.” I nodded.
“That’s really hot, you know.” Austin said.
“For Christ’s sakes, Tino! You shot me, you fucking idiot!” I cried. “Fuck this. I’m never playing on your team again. Fuck you.”
“You talk like a sailor, Avery.” Aaron said.
“We can’t all be saintly like you. Where’s the fun in that?” I asked. “I’m tired. Fuck all of you.”
I laid down in Austin’s bunk and stared at the ceiling. He came and got in bed with me. “Tomorrow night. Be ready.”
“Can’t wait.” I smiled.
***
“I love this town. It’s beautiful.” I sighed happily, hand in hand with Austin in the French Quarter of New Orleans.
“You’re beautiful.” Austin replied.
“Can we get our fortunes told?” I asked excitedly, looking at the shop we’d just passed.
Austin smiled. “We can do whatever you want, baby girl.”
“Marie Laveau’s is legit. I’ve heard all about it.” I giggled, walking in. Marie Laveau’s Voodoo Shop was one of the most famous and it was packed. After a wait we were able to get a woman named Rose to read our palms. I went first.
“I’m so sorry.” Was the first thing she said. “My condolences for your loss. Recently, was it?”
I knew exactly what she meant. “A little more than two years.”
“You shouldn’t blame yourself though. It was not your fault. Don’t be afraid. I see love soon.” She said, examining my palm. “Lots of love. You deserve it after what you’ve been through. The man you hold a grudge against will get what he deserves too. Happiness. Maybe even a family. Things are going to go very well for you. You need control, don’t you? You’re trying to get it in the wrong way, sweetheart. You’ve got to stop that. Things will be very good for you soon.”
I was shaken. It was then Austin’s turn. I got up and he sat down and gave her his hand. “You two are the perfect pair. I’ve never felt such tragedy. She would be proud of you, sweetheart. My sympathy to you as well for your loss. I see a family. A massive family. You’ll get another shot at being a daddy and I don’t see you messing it up this time. You’re in love. Things are going great for you right now, aren’t they? They’ll get even better.” She said.
We paid her and left, sitting in a restaurant around the corner.
Austin laughed. “That was so cool.”
“Wicked.” I agreed.
“What did she mean, Ave? When she talked about the way you were controlling things?” He asked.
I sighed; I knew this talk was coming. “I had a tough time of things after everything happened. I felt like I was losing my mind; I felt like I was crazy. I needed control of one thing, just one, in my life. So I haven’t really. . . I haven’t really been eating.”
“You know you can’t do that anymore. Right?” He asked quietly.
“I’ve been doing better really.”
“I’m going to be here for you, okay, Ave? For real this time.”

Notes

you guys are perf xxxx