This Is Not What It Is.
V
Waking up lying on my stomach, my eyes flickering around the room. I wince when I glanced at the window. York was sitting on the ground with his laptop on his lap. I roll over on the bed to move closer to where he was.
"Morning Starshine," He mumbles.
"Morning....," I say with a bit of a raspy voice, aka morning voice.
"Want to go get breakfast from the hotel or go to the ihop..." He starts.
"Ihop, oh god, please," I respond.
"Well, I'm going to tell the rest of the guys," He says as he stands up, setting his laptop on the desk. He left the room.
I climbed out of bed. I grabbed my phone. I went into the bathroom. I blinked at the grossness of my face in the mirror. I went ahead peed and washed my hands. I washed my face after, scrubbing a bit hard. I wanted to shower but I already feel bad for delaying the guys eating. I changed into new clothes. I pulled on one of my jumpers. I looked in the mirror. I nodded and slipped on my jeggings. I slide on my toms. I ruffle my hair. I do a deep sigh. I walked back into the bedroom, seeing York standing there in underwear, that was covered in Spider-Man. I giggled like a little school girl. He quickly pulled up his pants, his face going red. I walked to him, tossing my arms around his waist. He laughed and smiles.
"Don't laugh at my underwear!" York says in a 'don't tell the rest of the guys' voice.
"It's funny n cute," I tease.
"You are so mean to me," He mumbles.
"Only cause I care, Yorky," I reply with a smile.
He ruffles my hair and slips on his toms. He made sure he has his phone and his keys and the hotel keys. We walked out the room, into the hallway. The rest of the guys stumbles out of their rooms. I mumbled their names under my breath quietly. Spencer, Elijah, York, and Simon. Yeah, the four goobers I'm in a band with. I stiffly laugh at the thought that ran through my head. They all turned to me. I stopped and spoke up slightly.
"Morning."
"Morning Phoenix," Elijah says as he hugs me. I hugged him, God, he has amazing hugs. I finally let go.
"Morning Phoe," Spencer says. I hug him tightly. He hugs back I squinted at his neck.
"Did you get a tattoo?" I ask.
"Yeah, me and Tino went to get one," He replies.
"Why didn't you take me?" I nag.
"You were on your date with Austin," He defends. I finally let go off him, pouting slightly. He dropped his arms with a devilish smile on his face.
"MORNING PHOOOOOENIIIIIX," Simon sings. I laugh as I hug him tightly, he tosses his arms around me, hugging me back just as tight.
We released from our hug. We walk down to the elevator, walking inside. I don't know if I was the only one who saw Austin getting out before we entered. Spencer, wiggled his arms around my waist, holding me protectively. I leaned into his touch slightly. Spencer and I are the closest. We went to high school together and met back up at college, which surprised me. We all have associates degree. Lame, right? I swore to myself if the band breaks up or goes on hiatus, I'd go back to college to finish my education. We walk out the door and head towards the IHOP. I yawn slightly, my eyes watering up a bit. I look down to wipe my eyes and, of course, everyone notices.
"Are you crying Phoenix?" Spencer asks me.
"No, I just yawned and my eyes i guess teared up."
"Fine fine."
I just couldn't wait to play and go somewhere else and new and exciting. We finally get to IHOP. The hostest asked how many, we replied with five. We get asked booth or table.
"Table," Simon says.
"Alright follow me," she says softly as she leads us over to a six person table.
We all sit down and order our drinks which consist of coffee and ice water for the guys and an ice tea for me. The guys chatted about the football game, which York missed out on. It was a steelers, cowboy, and eagles (me) band. The cowboys and eagles game get pretty intense for us. We always make stupid bets, which me 6 out of 10 times I lose. We already established the bet for this game, which is for Elijah to do my make up for stage and pick out my clothes. I'm terrified.
"Phoe...," Spencer questions.
"Hm?" I hum quietly.
"Austin...." He answers my hum.
"He gets one more date," I mumble.
"I remember in high school you wanted to marry him," He states.
The course of "awh's" that came from the boys that caused me to blush deeply and dart my eyes and my head to look at my hands. They are some of the best and some of the worst people I know. We all get our drinks and order our food. We kinda ate in pure silence, and it was comfortable. We all pitched in for the bill and the tip. We payed and left to go back to the hotel. We went in our rooms. I hopped in the shower right away. The warm water hitting my skin, making me feel completely relaxed. I get out and wrap my towel around me and putting my hair up in a towel. I walk into the bedroom, getting some clothes, walking right back into the bathroom. I dried off my body and slide on my delicates. I sat down on the floor. I got a good look at my legs and my fingers tracing the fresh ones. I bit my lip at the sting. I grabbed my pants and slide them on. I slide on the shirt, a small huff escaping my lips when I realize the shirt is York's. I shrugged my shoulder and hung the towel up. I scrunched the towel off of my head, my long brunette locks fall down. I take my paddle brush and start brushing my hair. My hair is so long. I'm also due for a trim. My hair is also very layered. I sighed quietly. I look down at my hands. York took this opportunity to sneak up behind me, he pokes my side. I squeal laugh and turn around.
"York!"
"You were hating yourself again.•
"Like I always do."
"You always glance down at your hands."
"I still think I'm the same girl from high school."
"Because you are 20."
"Yeah...but..."
"No buts."
York kisses my forehead and walks back into the bedroom. I put my hair up.
--———--———
We checked out and piled back into our bus. We drove the ten minutes to the venue. I sigh quietly as I look at my phone for the first time in a while.
Kitty: [i]Smoke with me after the concert. Smoking buddddddy.[/i]
Austin: [i]Alan asked me to text you, to make sure you are okay. So, you okay?[/i]
I hit the reply bar in Austin's thread.
[i]I'm fine, I promise. I'll see you at the venue.[/i]
I went into Alan's thread.
[i]Okay! We'll smoke![/i]
I put my phone in my pocket. I looked out the window and saw the venue.
"Baby, this is paradise," I mumble to myself as we park.
Everyone shuffled off the bus. We loaded gear into the venue. We were a little late. Everyone was there before us. Alan and Austin were talking in the hallway. I walked up behind Austin. Alan saw me and tried to not smile. I got on my tippy toes, covering his eyes.
"Guess who?" I say in my singsong voice.
"Hm..." Austin contemplated, "Phoenixxx..."
"Yes." Alan whispers.
I uncovered his eyes and he turned around, tossing his lanky arms around me in a lovely embraced. I returned the embrace. I was smiling, like actually fucking smiling. I felt little things flutter in my stomach. I ignores those. We pulled away and looked at each other.
"Austin...can I..."I started.
"Phoenix, we have sound check," York interrupt.
"Can we talk after we go sound check?" I ask Austin.
"Yeah." He replies with a crooked smile.
I lean up, kissing his cheek. He smiles widely. York and I walked off to the stage. We got on the stage. I took the microphone.
"What song do you wanna do?" Elijah asks.
"I'm fine with whatever," I reply
"Alright," Elijah says as he starts playing.
We ended up covering Asking's song "A Prophecy" I think I did good. We all cheered afterwards. We left the stage. We got into our dressing room. The guys pulled out their laptops. I took my phone out. I looked at my messages. Austin had texted me once.
Austin: [i]Still wanna talk?[/i]
Oh shit, I totally forgot. I stood up and slipped out silently. I walked up their dressing room and knocked on the door. The door open to a familiar ginger face.
"Hey Alan."
"Hey Phoenix, what's up?"
"I came to steal Austin, for a while."
"Okay...I'll get him."
Alan disappears into the abyss of the OMAM dressing room. Next thing I know I see Austin standing in the door way.
"Hey, so where do you wanna talk?" Austin asks.
I took his hand and our fingers intertwined together. My cheeks blushed at the feeling I got from this simple touch. I started walking and Austin was a bit behind me. I got out behind the building. I stop walking and Austin looks at me.
"Well?" He asks.
"Austin....I," clearing my throat to buy myself time, "was wondering if you wanted to like go get some food later."
"Yeah, of course!" Austin replies.
"Awesome." I reply full of confidence.
I lean up and pulled Austin down a little to kiss his cheek then walked off back into the venue. He followed behind me and walked to the stage. To do sound check I assume. I went into the dressing room. Simon and Elijah where chatting away. Spencer and York chatting with the Tonight Alive dudes. Jenna was sitting there making eyes at Elijah, I could tell. I sat down next to her.
"Hey Jens," I use my singsong voice.
"Hey Phoenix," she replies, her eyes looking at me then adjusting back on to Elijah.
"Go talk to him," I encourage.
"What do you mean?" She asks.
"You've taken a fancy to him..."I muse.
"Yeah, but, I don't know," Jenna stalls.
"Awwwh, you are so nervous!"
"Shush up American."
I laugh as she walks up to them and greets them. They hug. I turn my attention away, I'm a great match maker. I got a text from Alan.
[i]Austin and you have a daaaaaate. Awwwwwh! Date number two. After the third date it's okay for you two to bang, you know that? Get drunk that date and have drunk sex.[/i]
I laugh at it. I was some what aware of that rule. It was really dumb and I never usually get to a third date, hell even a second date so. I always leave cause tour or cause I'm realllllly fuckin' picky.
"Morning Starshine," He mumbles.
"Morning....," I say with a bit of a raspy voice, aka morning voice.
"Want to go get breakfast from the hotel or go to the ihop..." He starts.
"Ihop, oh god, please," I respond.
"Well, I'm going to tell the rest of the guys," He says as he stands up, setting his laptop on the desk. He left the room.
I climbed out of bed. I grabbed my phone. I went into the bathroom. I blinked at the grossness of my face in the mirror. I went ahead peed and washed my hands. I washed my face after, scrubbing a bit hard. I wanted to shower but I already feel bad for delaying the guys eating. I changed into new clothes. I pulled on one of my jumpers. I looked in the mirror. I nodded and slipped on my jeggings. I slide on my toms. I ruffle my hair. I do a deep sigh. I walked back into the bedroom, seeing York standing there in underwear, that was covered in Spider-Man. I giggled like a little school girl. He quickly pulled up his pants, his face going red. I walked to him, tossing my arms around his waist. He laughed and smiles.
"Don't laugh at my underwear!" York says in a 'don't tell the rest of the guys' voice.
"It's funny n cute," I tease.
"You are so mean to me," He mumbles.
"Only cause I care, Yorky," I reply with a smile.
He ruffles my hair and slips on his toms. He made sure he has his phone and his keys and the hotel keys. We walked out the room, into the hallway. The rest of the guys stumbles out of their rooms. I mumbled their names under my breath quietly. Spencer, Elijah, York, and Simon. Yeah, the four goobers I'm in a band with. I stiffly laugh at the thought that ran through my head. They all turned to me. I stopped and spoke up slightly.
"Morning."
"Morning Phoenix," Elijah says as he hugs me. I hugged him, God, he has amazing hugs. I finally let go.
"Morning Phoe," Spencer says. I hug him tightly. He hugs back I squinted at his neck.
"Did you get a tattoo?" I ask.
"Yeah, me and Tino went to get one," He replies.
"Why didn't you take me?" I nag.
"You were on your date with Austin," He defends. I finally let go off him, pouting slightly. He dropped his arms with a devilish smile on his face.
"MORNING PHOOOOOENIIIIIX," Simon sings. I laugh as I hug him tightly, he tosses his arms around me, hugging me back just as tight.
We released from our hug. We walk down to the elevator, walking inside. I don't know if I was the only one who saw Austin getting out before we entered. Spencer, wiggled his arms around my waist, holding me protectively. I leaned into his touch slightly. Spencer and I are the closest. We went to high school together and met back up at college, which surprised me. We all have associates degree. Lame, right? I swore to myself if the band breaks up or goes on hiatus, I'd go back to college to finish my education. We walk out the door and head towards the IHOP. I yawn slightly, my eyes watering up a bit. I look down to wipe my eyes and, of course, everyone notices.
"Are you crying Phoenix?" Spencer asks me.
"No, I just yawned and my eyes i guess teared up."
"Fine fine."
I just couldn't wait to play and go somewhere else and new and exciting. We finally get to IHOP. The hostest asked how many, we replied with five. We get asked booth or table.
"Table," Simon says.
"Alright follow me," she says softly as she leads us over to a six person table.
We all sit down and order our drinks which consist of coffee and ice water for the guys and an ice tea for me. The guys chatted about the football game, which York missed out on. It was a steelers, cowboy, and eagles (me) band. The cowboys and eagles game get pretty intense for us. We always make stupid bets, which me 6 out of 10 times I lose. We already established the bet for this game, which is for Elijah to do my make up for stage and pick out my clothes. I'm terrified.
"Phoe...," Spencer questions.
"Hm?" I hum quietly.
"Austin...." He answers my hum.
"He gets one more date," I mumble.
"I remember in high school you wanted to marry him," He states.
The course of "awh's" that came from the boys that caused me to blush deeply and dart my eyes and my head to look at my hands. They are some of the best and some of the worst people I know. We all get our drinks and order our food. We kinda ate in pure silence, and it was comfortable. We all pitched in for the bill and the tip. We payed and left to go back to the hotel. We went in our rooms. I hopped in the shower right away. The warm water hitting my skin, making me feel completely relaxed. I get out and wrap my towel around me and putting my hair up in a towel. I walk into the bedroom, getting some clothes, walking right back into the bathroom. I dried off my body and slide on my delicates. I sat down on the floor. I got a good look at my legs and my fingers tracing the fresh ones. I bit my lip at the sting. I grabbed my pants and slide them on. I slide on the shirt, a small huff escaping my lips when I realize the shirt is York's. I shrugged my shoulder and hung the towel up. I scrunched the towel off of my head, my long brunette locks fall down. I take my paddle brush and start brushing my hair. My hair is so long. I'm also due for a trim. My hair is also very layered. I sighed quietly. I look down at my hands. York took this opportunity to sneak up behind me, he pokes my side. I squeal laugh and turn around.
"York!"
"You were hating yourself again.•
"Like I always do."
"You always glance down at your hands."
"I still think I'm the same girl from high school."
"Because you are 20."
"Yeah...but..."
"No buts."
York kisses my forehead and walks back into the bedroom. I put my hair up.
--———--———
We checked out and piled back into our bus. We drove the ten minutes to the venue. I sigh quietly as I look at my phone for the first time in a while.
Kitty: [i]Smoke with me after the concert. Smoking buddddddy.[/i]
Austin: [i]Alan asked me to text you, to make sure you are okay. So, you okay?[/i]
I hit the reply bar in Austin's thread.
[i]I'm fine, I promise. I'll see you at the venue.[/i]
I went into Alan's thread.
[i]Okay! We'll smoke![/i]
I put my phone in my pocket. I looked out the window and saw the venue.
"Baby, this is paradise," I mumble to myself as we park.
Everyone shuffled off the bus. We loaded gear into the venue. We were a little late. Everyone was there before us. Alan and Austin were talking in the hallway. I walked up behind Austin. Alan saw me and tried to not smile. I got on my tippy toes, covering his eyes.
"Guess who?" I say in my singsong voice.
"Hm..." Austin contemplated, "Phoenixxx..."
"Yes." Alan whispers.
I uncovered his eyes and he turned around, tossing his lanky arms around me in a lovely embraced. I returned the embrace. I was smiling, like actually fucking smiling. I felt little things flutter in my stomach. I ignores those. We pulled away and looked at each other.
"Austin...can I..."I started.
"Phoenix, we have sound check," York interrupt.
"Can we talk after we go sound check?" I ask Austin.
"Yeah." He replies with a crooked smile.
I lean up, kissing his cheek. He smiles widely. York and I walked off to the stage. We got on the stage. I took the microphone.
"What song do you wanna do?" Elijah asks.
"I'm fine with whatever," I reply
"Alright," Elijah says as he starts playing.
We ended up covering Asking's song "A Prophecy" I think I did good. We all cheered afterwards. We left the stage. We got into our dressing room. The guys pulled out their laptops. I took my phone out. I looked at my messages. Austin had texted me once.
Austin: [i]Still wanna talk?[/i]
Oh shit, I totally forgot. I stood up and slipped out silently. I walked up their dressing room and knocked on the door. The door open to a familiar ginger face.
"Hey Alan."
"Hey Phoenix, what's up?"
"I came to steal Austin, for a while."
"Okay...I'll get him."
Alan disappears into the abyss of the OMAM dressing room. Next thing I know I see Austin standing in the door way.
"Hey, so where do you wanna talk?" Austin asks.
I took his hand and our fingers intertwined together. My cheeks blushed at the feeling I got from this simple touch. I started walking and Austin was a bit behind me. I got out behind the building. I stop walking and Austin looks at me.
"Well?" He asks.
"Austin....I," clearing my throat to buy myself time, "was wondering if you wanted to like go get some food later."
"Yeah, of course!" Austin replies.
"Awesome." I reply full of confidence.
I lean up and pulled Austin down a little to kiss his cheek then walked off back into the venue. He followed behind me and walked to the stage. To do sound check I assume. I went into the dressing room. Simon and Elijah where chatting away. Spencer and York chatting with the Tonight Alive dudes. Jenna was sitting there making eyes at Elijah, I could tell. I sat down next to her.
"Hey Jens," I use my singsong voice.
"Hey Phoenix," she replies, her eyes looking at me then adjusting back on to Elijah.
"Go talk to him," I encourage.
"What do you mean?" She asks.
"You've taken a fancy to him..."I muse.
"Yeah, but, I don't know," Jenna stalls.
"Awwwh, you are so nervous!"
"Shush up American."
I laugh as she walks up to them and greets them. They hug. I turn my attention away, I'm a great match maker. I got a text from Alan.
[i]Austin and you have a daaaaaate. Awwwwwh! Date number two. After the third date it's okay for you two to bang, you know that? Get drunk that date and have drunk sex.[/i]
I laugh at it. I was some what aware of that rule. It was really dumb and I never usually get to a third date, hell even a second date so. I always leave cause tour or cause I'm realllllly fuckin' picky.
10/24/13