Saving Me
Explaining
Austin lead me to the living room, the guys following foot. I was nervous because I knew they were going to make me explain and it was hell talking about what he did. Austin squeezed my hand as we all sat down and made ourselves comfortable. "Hailey, I know this might be hard but can you please explain the reason as to why you ran away last night?" Austin asked. I was about to shake my head and say no, but then it occurred to me that after twenty-two years I could finally tell someone the truth. I hesitated but shook my head yes.
"Hell. That's what went on in that household." I started out, remembering all the cruel things he did.
"My father would beat me everyday from morning to night. Sometimes I'd get lucky if by time he got off of work and was already passed out drunk, then some nights luck just wasn't on my side." I took a deep breath before continuing. "My father knew were to hit so no one would notice, stomach, back, chest, thighs. Sometimes they were kicks, sometimes punches or then there's the times where it was both. He swore me to secrecy not to tell anyone or he'd kill me. I never doubted that, knowing my dad possessed that kind of mindset. No one ever questioned why I always wore long sleeve shirts, jackets and jeans the whole year round, but if they did? I told them I was cold or I just felt like it. They pressed the issue no more." I could see a fire burning in Austin's eyes as I spoke. I squeezed his hand telling him, it's okay.
"For years this went on. My dad was a pretty good actor and liar so he was able to deceive everyone without them ever questioning things. If my teachers saw something unusual they'd question it and I'd have to make up a lie, like I fell, or I tripped and ran into a pole, the invisible stairs fairy decided I was next. I was always frightened they'd call home and my dad would find out." I turned my back towards them and lifted up my shirt exposing bruises and cuts painting my back while a horizontal scar topped it all off. The guys gasped, starring wide eyed at what was just shown to them. "How did the scar happen, Hailey?" Alan asked as I pulled the shirt down and turned back around to face them.
"Dad thought it'd be hilarious to slash his daughter with a broken beer bottle. He's one hell of a sick bastard that's for sure." I muttered, furrowing my brows at the painful experience. "The night I ran away, dad..dad tried to kill me." I whispered, starting to shake. "At first I was being caring and thought about his health, suggesting maybe he should wait another hour or two before opening up another beer...he didn't like that suggestion and just yelled at me again to go get him one, so I did. Came back gave it to him and I asked if he needed anything else which in response I got nothing. So I took this as a sign that I could go back upstairs but...that wasn't the case." I could feel tears prickling at my eyes and I was shaking more uncontrollably.
"My dad came at me and punched me in the face, I fell to the ground as he started to unleash a series of punches/kicks. He said he wished...wished I would just die and at that moment I felt this rush of anger wash over me, I stopped pleading and for the first time in twenty-two years I fought back against my dad, I grabbed his leg and pulled him down to the hardwood floors he obviously wasn't expecting it..and then I knocked him out with his beer bottle and bolted out of the door...that's when I ran into Austin and truthfully I was never so happy in my entire life." At that moment I broke down and cried, sobbing uncontrollably. I felt multiple pairs of arms wrap around me as I cried.
It stayed that way until I calmed down. I wiped the remaining tears off my cheeks and Austin wrap an arm around my shoulder bringing me close. "You're safe with us now, Hailey. You'll never be going back to that bastard." I looked up at him, my baby blue orbs staring into his own. "Promise?" I said and held out my pinky which he responded with wrapping his very own around mine. "Promise."
- - - -
Alan and Austin went back to my house after I gave them my address. They were going to fetch my belongings and bring them back here. I suggested that I should go too so things would move in a much quicker pace but they denied my help and told me to wait patiently while they grabbed everything.
Luckily I knew my father worked late hours on weekends, so the transition would go smoothly. Twenty minutes went by and soon enough the boys were back fully loaded with everything.
The rest of us came out and began to quickly unpack everything placing it in the room where I previously slept before. "Did you guys remember to grab that box I asked for?" Austin gave a firm nod and handed me a pink glittery decorated box. I smiled and took it from him, "Thank you, I appreciate you guys doing this, I really do." Alan ruffled my hair. "No problem, Hails. Family is always going to be there for one another right?" I felt my heart swim, it felt nice to be treated so warmly for once.
"Okay, I believe that's the last of it." Austin stated closing the hatchet of his car. We all headed back inside. I thanked the guys again and headed upstairs to put everything up. I hadn't had much time to admire the room before but for someone like me, it was perfect. Queen sized bed, built in bathroom, a semi-walk in closet and just enough wall space for
all my posters and photographs. I began making the place mine.
Half an hour later, I was finished. The walls were no longer bare and now were decorated with all my band posters and nature photography, the bathroom now held all my toiletries and the closet was racked with my clothes and shoes. I grabbed the pink glittery decorated box and placed all the framed photographs of my mother and I on the empty nightstand. It held other memorable items like ribbons, written lyrics, drawings and my beat-down diary. I shoved it all under my bed. 'For another time, not now.' Then headed downstairs.
Walking downstairs I found the guys playing Gears of War in the living room. They were bickering back and forth like little kids. It was amusing but cute. I stole one of Austin's monsters from the fridge then sat down beside Aaron who was watching. I took a swig from my drink, "So who's winning?" I asked,"Right now? It's Austin & Alan but only by a point. So Tino & Phil could easily catch up and win the match." I nodded and took another sip of Monster, "Go Tino! Go Phil!" I cheered shaking my free fist. "Hey! You're suppose to be cheering for the winners, not the losers!" Alan said and I stuck my tongue out at him, shaking my head no. "Not anymore!" Tino commented before blowing Alan's head off with a gnasher, winning the game.
Alan whined saying that his death and their winning was bullshit. I laughed and high-fived Tino and Phil. "So, who's the loser now Alan?" I teased and grinned when he flipped me off. "Well if you think you're so much better than Austin and I, why not step up to the plate then?" He smirked patting the spot between him and Austin. I smiled and grabbed a controller sitting down between them on the ground.
"1 v. 2, then?"
"You're on, Hails."
"Hell. That's what went on in that household." I started out, remembering all the cruel things he did.
"My father would beat me everyday from morning to night. Sometimes I'd get lucky if by time he got off of work and was already passed out drunk, then some nights luck just wasn't on my side." I took a deep breath before continuing. "My father knew were to hit so no one would notice, stomach, back, chest, thighs. Sometimes they were kicks, sometimes punches or then there's the times where it was both. He swore me to secrecy not to tell anyone or he'd kill me. I never doubted that, knowing my dad possessed that kind of mindset. No one ever questioned why I always wore long sleeve shirts, jackets and jeans the whole year round, but if they did? I told them I was cold or I just felt like it. They pressed the issue no more." I could see a fire burning in Austin's eyes as I spoke. I squeezed his hand telling him, it's okay.
"For years this went on. My dad was a pretty good actor and liar so he was able to deceive everyone without them ever questioning things. If my teachers saw something unusual they'd question it and I'd have to make up a lie, like I fell, or I tripped and ran into a pole, the invisible stairs fairy decided I was next. I was always frightened they'd call home and my dad would find out." I turned my back towards them and lifted up my shirt exposing bruises and cuts painting my back while a horizontal scar topped it all off. The guys gasped, starring wide eyed at what was just shown to them. "How did the scar happen, Hailey?" Alan asked as I pulled the shirt down and turned back around to face them.
"Dad thought it'd be hilarious to slash his daughter with a broken beer bottle. He's one hell of a sick bastard that's for sure." I muttered, furrowing my brows at the painful experience. "The night I ran away, dad..dad tried to kill me." I whispered, starting to shake. "At first I was being caring and thought about his health, suggesting maybe he should wait another hour or two before opening up another beer...he didn't like that suggestion and just yelled at me again to go get him one, so I did. Came back gave it to him and I asked if he needed anything else which in response I got nothing. So I took this as a sign that I could go back upstairs but...that wasn't the case." I could feel tears prickling at my eyes and I was shaking more uncontrollably.
"My dad came at me and punched me in the face, I fell to the ground as he started to unleash a series of punches/kicks. He said he wished...wished I would just die and at that moment I felt this rush of anger wash over me, I stopped pleading and for the first time in twenty-two years I fought back against my dad, I grabbed his leg and pulled him down to the hardwood floors he obviously wasn't expecting it..and then I knocked him out with his beer bottle and bolted out of the door...that's when I ran into Austin and truthfully I was never so happy in my entire life." At that moment I broke down and cried, sobbing uncontrollably. I felt multiple pairs of arms wrap around me as I cried.
It stayed that way until I calmed down. I wiped the remaining tears off my cheeks and Austin wrap an arm around my shoulder bringing me close. "You're safe with us now, Hailey. You'll never be going back to that bastard." I looked up at him, my baby blue orbs staring into his own. "Promise?" I said and held out my pinky which he responded with wrapping his very own around mine. "Promise."
- - - -
Alan and Austin went back to my house after I gave them my address. They were going to fetch my belongings and bring them back here. I suggested that I should go too so things would move in a much quicker pace but they denied my help and told me to wait patiently while they grabbed everything.
Luckily I knew my father worked late hours on weekends, so the transition would go smoothly. Twenty minutes went by and soon enough the boys were back fully loaded with everything.
The rest of us came out and began to quickly unpack everything placing it in the room where I previously slept before. "Did you guys remember to grab that box I asked for?" Austin gave a firm nod and handed me a pink glittery decorated box. I smiled and took it from him, "Thank you, I appreciate you guys doing this, I really do." Alan ruffled my hair. "No problem, Hails. Family is always going to be there for one another right?" I felt my heart swim, it felt nice to be treated so warmly for once.
"Okay, I believe that's the last of it." Austin stated closing the hatchet of his car. We all headed back inside. I thanked the guys again and headed upstairs to put everything up. I hadn't had much time to admire the room before but for someone like me, it was perfect. Queen sized bed, built in bathroom, a semi-walk in closet and just enough wall space for
all my posters and photographs. I began making the place mine.
Half an hour later, I was finished. The walls were no longer bare and now were decorated with all my band posters and nature photography, the bathroom now held all my toiletries and the closet was racked with my clothes and shoes. I grabbed the pink glittery decorated box and placed all the framed photographs of my mother and I on the empty nightstand. It held other memorable items like ribbons, written lyrics, drawings and my beat-down diary. I shoved it all under my bed. 'For another time, not now.' Then headed downstairs.
Walking downstairs I found the guys playing Gears of War in the living room. They were bickering back and forth like little kids. It was amusing but cute. I stole one of Austin's monsters from the fridge then sat down beside Aaron who was watching. I took a swig from my drink, "So who's winning?" I asked,"Right now? It's Austin & Alan but only by a point. So Tino & Phil could easily catch up and win the match." I nodded and took another sip of Monster, "Go Tino! Go Phil!" I cheered shaking my free fist. "Hey! You're suppose to be cheering for the winners, not the losers!" Alan said and I stuck my tongue out at him, shaking my head no. "Not anymore!" Tino commented before blowing Alan's head off with a gnasher, winning the game.
Alan whined saying that his death and their winning was bullshit. I laughed and high-fived Tino and Phil. "So, who's the loser now Alan?" I teased and grinned when he flipped me off. "Well if you think you're so much better than Austin and I, why not step up to the plate then?" He smirked patting the spot between him and Austin. I smiled and grabbed a controller sitting down between them on the ground.
"1 v. 2, then?"
"You're on, Hails."
11/5/13