My Understandings

Now two days later, she’s watching her band and brother leave. She spent all her time with them; watching movies. She couldn’t leave the house or do much activity. Doctors’ orders. While they’re gone, Mitch, Lynzie and the guys including myself are gonna stay with Ellie. Kellin and Katelynne along with Copeland are coming over today, so are Jolie and Kenadee so I get to spend my day with kids running around.
Yay.
“Skype me when you can.” Ellie and Lynzie says to David. Since WCAR are still on Warped, they’re at the venue now with SNS’s tour bus.
“Take care of her.” David warns me. a black car pulls up and coming out the passenger seat is none other than Shayley Bourget. With Bass in one hand and a bag of clothing in another, he walks up to me.
“Carlile.”
“Bourget.”
“AHHH! Ellie! IT’S SHAYLEY!” Miley screams. Ellie chuckles, but begins to cough. I eye her carefully making sure it’s not a sign of infection. Ellie walks up to Shayley.
“Hello future brother. I’m Ellie.” She sticks a hand out for him.
“Ah, you’re the one Devin won’t stop talking about you. I think he has a crush on you.” Ellie blushes like crazy.
“Well, between you and me, he is kina cute.” She says low enough for Shayley to hear but I eavesdrop. So I heard it. She giggles at this and they make more conversation. I sit on the chair in the front yard and close my eyes.
“Hey man,” it’s Alan. He plops on the grass next to me. “Jealous of Shayley??” he wiggles his eyebrows at me.
“Pshh, no.” I run my fingers through my hair. Alan eyes me. “It’s Devin.” I roll my head around.
“Well man, did Vic tell you? That crazy girl who was wandering around Warped with the beer bottle had some history with Mike if ya know what I mean. They had a full blown out argument and she smashed the bottle against their tour bus, over his head. The video is all over YouTube, it’s hilarious.” He chuckles.
“Yeah.” I mumble. Alan hits me in the shoulder.
“Cheer up man! Life is finally looking good for you, us, Ellie, man cheer up! No, tonight, we’re going out for some drinks. No if’s, and’s, or but’s. chill man!” a car horn beeps through.
“Bye!” Ellie and Lynzie wave at the Van carrying away Breathe Carolina and Sorry Not Sorry. We all begin to walk into the house when an arm stops me.
“Austin?” Ellie asks. I turn so my eyes meet hers.
“Yeah?”
“Was she pretty?” she asks.
“Who?”
“Gielle. Was she pretty?”
Surfing. I hate it. Well I love it, but now I hate it.
I also hate how Austin described Gielle. He said and I quote;
“She’s like the waves. Unpredictable, cool, calming, beautiful. Something everyone loves.” Since then, I haven’t really talked to Austin. Just Jolie and Katelynne. It’s midnight now. Alan is throwing a party at the beach, which includes drinking. So the girls and I decided to stay back. Kenadee and Copeland were asleep, so we’re just watching TV and doing girl talk.
“Oh my god, Daniel Sharman is so hot!” Katelynne squealed. Our girl talk was really watching seasons of Teen Wolf. Derek is now ripping his shirt off and howling into the night.
“I swear Kellin needs to work out more.” She sighs and takes another spoonful of ice-cream.
“Tell me about it. It’s hard to get Mitch to workout. Unless you get him a tattoo after.” She giggles. I laugh at this too. Mitch is a really cool guy. Like an older brother. He’s funny and he’s an amazing father. So is Kellin but Kellin is just Kellin. Weird, creepy, and when drunk, weirder.
“So, who’s the guy in your life?” Katelynne nudges me with her elbow, not taking her eyes off the now shirtless Tyler Posey.
“No one now.” My dad’s words still haunt me. “I’m supposed to be meeting Devin for coffee tomorrow. But that’s not even a date.” It can’t be because I’m supposed to fall in love with Andy, Vic, or Austin. And right now, Austin and I are not on good terms.
“Oh come one! We know you like Austin.” Jolie pipes in.
“Yeah. That’s all Kellin talks about is how you and Austin should be together. But then again he thinks Vic is secretly gay, so I don’t know.” I laugh.
“Guyssss.” I hold out the ‘s’. “I can’t date him even if I wanted too! It’s against Rise Records.” I slump further down the couch and stare at Allison. She’s so bitchy in my opinion.
“Tell us how you feel woman!” Jolie and Katelynne stare at me.
“Describe Austin in three words.” Katelynne orders. I sigh and run my fingers through my hair.
“Uhm, okay?” I tie my hair up into a quick bun and think.
“Caring.” I say out the top of my head.
“Okay, what else?” Jolie asks from the floor. I flick some popcorn at her face.
“Hold on woman!” I giggle. “He’s funny talented, and lazy.” I blurt out.
“Funny how?” Katelynne flicks ice cream at my face.
“I love how when he cracks a joke, he has so much enthusiasm in it. That smile, it’s adorable. And when his eyes have that glimmer in them.” I think about that one joke he asked me at Warped.
“How much does a polar bear weight?”
“Austin no,”
“Answer!”
“I don’t know.”
“Enough to break the ice!”
I giggle.
“Aw, Elizabeth’s in love.” Jolie sings. I put my hands to my cheeks to hide the color rushing into them. I roll to my side to hide from their taunting.
“Katelynne,” I whine. She opens her mouth to answer, but the front door is slammed open by a drunk Austin and a tipsy Kellin. Jolie’s attention snaps up the stairs.
“Go check on the kids, me and Ellie will handle this.” Katelynne says to her. She nods and trudges up the stairs. I walk over to Alan and throw his arms around my shoulder.
“Ellie,” burp. “Youmissed a rad ass party.” He burps again and then his whole body goes slack. There’s sand falling out of his hair and his mouth is hanging open.
“Geez Alan,” I struggle to keep him up, but I got him up the stairs and thrown onto a bed. Tino and Phil walk in after me. Phil is little tipsy, Tino is completely sober. He gives me a tiny smile and walks in the room. Aaron bounces in after him and I walk to the hall. Katelynne is staggering up the stairs with a drunk Mitch and tipsy Kellin who is tripping over everything.
“Want me to help?” I ask. She takes a sharp intake of breath.
“Yeah, can you get Kellin?” I nod and walk over to him. He starts to slap my hands.
“I can do this!” he slurs. He lifts his foot up and falls backwards. He crashes into Austin and they fall down the stairs onto the floor. Kellin pulls a liquor bottle out of his pocket and takes a sip.
“Kellin!” I walk down the stairs and snatch the bottle away. I put it in my back pocket and lift him up by the shoulders. He doesn’t move his feet, so the challenge becomes a tad bit harder. But I manage to get him into Katelynne's arms.
“Thanks,” she breathes. She drags him into their room and the door closes. Jolie walks out.
“Everything alright?” she tucks a piece of hair behind her ear.
“Yeah. I can handle Austin.” She nods.
“Night Ellie.” She smiles.
“Night Jolie. Tell Kenadee I said night too.” She nods and walks into her room. I go to Austin who is now curled up in a ball on the floor.
“Come on Austin.” I try to pry his arms apart.
“I saw her.” he slurs.
“Saw who?” I ask while trying to get him to stand.
“Gielle. She was fucking hot.” A pang of jealousy hits my heart.
“Was she?” I gulp. I focus on getting him to stand.
“Yea. Man, I just wanted to fuck her.” he’s drunk I know it. He’ll forget about it in the morning. “You should’ve came. You could’ve saw how smoking she was.” He strips over his feet and falls into my arms. I take this opportunity to drag him.
“Austin, I don’t care.” I mumble.
“Why? You jealous that I find her more attractive than you?” he snaps.
“No. but it would be nice if you didn’t rub her in your ex-girlfriends face!” I retort.
“That’s why we call them ex,” he puts emphases on ex. I felt tears stinging me eyes.
“You don’t mean that.” I say.
“Yes I do.” he says. “Ellie, you’re nothing but a slut. You dated Vic, Andy, and fucked Ryan while dating Vic.” He whispers in my ear. “Ryan tells me everything. That’s why they’re kicking you out the band. You’re a slut, a whore, so get over it.” He pushes me aside and trips up the stairs. I’m left at the bottom of the stairs with tears threaten to pour out at any moment. I know he didn’t mean that. He’s drunk. But then again, he sounded pretty sober to me. I take out my phone and dial Devin’s number.
“Hello?”
“Hey Devin, sorry, but I was wondering are you anywhere near Long Beach?” I ask.
“Uhm, yeah, about thirty minutes away. Why?”
“I was wondering if we could get that coffee now at Long Beach.”
“Yeah, sure, but why Long Beach? Aren’t you in L.A?”
“Well, I was going to stay the night at my mother’s. Things are kinda rocky here.” I mumble.
“Well sure. See you then.”
“Yeah.” I feel the tears pooling over.
“Ellie? You okay?” he asks.
“No. Not really.” I sob.
“Well, go to your mother’s and I’ll be there. Text me the address.”
“Okay.” I hang up and text him the address and go to get change. Austin is passed out asleep on my bed. I put a hand to his cheek and flinch when he starts to stir. I quickly take my hand away and go to get dress. I put on some mint shorts and a grey jacket. I put my infinity necklace on my charm bracelet, and my grey Vans. I pack some clothes for two days and I grab my keys and my iPhone and take a look back at Austin.
“I bet she was pretty.” I sigh and slam the door shut hoping to make his hangover worse. I get in my car and drive. I’m not supposed to do any driving what so over for a couple days because the medicine I take makes me drowsy, but right now, I don’t want to be in the same household as Austin. I don’t know how I made the three hour drive, but I did. Ten break downs, pulling over five times 16, 321 tears, and two screaming sessions later, I pull up into my mom’s driveway. I see a jeep in her driveway so I suspect Devin is here. I use the spare key under her mat to open the door. the lights are off.
She must be asleep.
I walk up the stairs. it’s been a while since I’ve been here. At least by myself. I hear noises coming from my mom’s room. Screaming. Panicking, I grab a knife that is hidden under the mat in the hallway and open my mom’s door.
Oh. My. God.
~Austin~
“Ellie,” I kick the sand around me. today was the day I was gonna ask her to be my girlfriend for real. Not make out, yell, make out, yell. I want to hold her hand and call her mine. She walked up towards the cliff and I followed her.
“Ellie?” I asked. She was bouncing around. She had on an all-black bikini and it well with her curves and brown hair. It was chilly, well it’s November. But she insisted on going cliff diving. I’m crazy about her so I came with her.
“Austin, come on!” she whined. I followed her and she took a step back. She swung her body and flung it gracefully over the edge.
“Oh god.” I sighed. I took a deep breath and jumped in after her. the icy cold water hit me in such a rush, it knocked the air out of my lungs. Under the water it was dark, cold I love it! I kicked my legs and swam to the surface. Ellie’s hair popped up next to me.
“Oh lawd. That was awesome!” she swam towards me. it’s now or never Austin.
“Ellie, I want to ask you something.” I stuttered. Maybe it was the coldness from the water. Or maybe it was my nerves…..
“Sure, go ahead.” She met my eyes and I swear I just pissed in the water.
“Will you, erm, be, ugh.” I laid back so I was floating.
“Yes?” she asked, confused.
“Will you be my girlfriend?” I rush out. She started to swim away from me. great. I was about to swim to shore when a blob of black popped in front of me and shot out of the water. She attached her lips to mine and wrapped her legs around my waist.
“It’s about damn time.”
~Ellie~
“Ellie, wait.”
“No mom.” I spat. I grabbed my bag of clothes from the ground and walked to the door.
“Elizabeth.”
“Forget it mom!” I began to open the door.
“Elizabeth Summer Schmitt!” I turned around with tears stinging my eyes.
“What mom! nothing you say or do is gonna make this situation any better. You’re still wearing your wedding band and then you go and do that! how dare you! Dad wouldn’t never have done this! And to make it worse it’s been going on since dad was alive?! You’re sick mom. you disgust me!” I yell. Her eyes turn from hurt to anger. She whips her hand back and slaps it across my face.
“You will not talk to me like that in my household!” she snaps.
“I don’t care!” I turn the knob but a hand grabs mine. I look into the eyes of Josh.
“So you finally decided to come back to me. Welcome home sister.” He grabs my wrist and tugs me.
“Lie! Lie! Liar! Liar, you’ll pay for your sins!” I scream at them. I try to pull my wrist away but Josh doesn’t let go. I start to get worry. My eyes widen as his darken. By now my mom andher toy left. “Let me go.” He shakes his head and backs me up against the wall. I start to cry and fight back but he doesn’t let go. Not even when he hit me in the stomach did he let me escape. instead he drug me to the couch and proceeded by taking off my clothes. I start to cry and kick. He takes off his belt and ties it around my head so it keeps me from crying. As he unbuttons I pray silently. I close my eyes and block out the thoughts and sounds of what’s being happen to my body. My chest ached the whole time, making my heart beat irregularly since I just had surgery. About an hour later after raping me five times he leaves. I quickly put all my clothes back on and I get in my car and text Devin to meet me at Starbucks. I had five missed calls. One each from Katelynne, Jolie, Tino, Mitch, and Kellin. I hit ignore on all of them and drove to Starbucks. I am so disgusted. First I caught my mom having sex with the father of the guy who raped me, but to make I worse, she kept the wedding band on. And not only that, she’s been cheating on my dad sine a year before he died. Then she hits me across the face. what mother does that? and then I get rapped. By the same guy and five times. My phone rings again and it’s annoying me. I want to cry and scream, but I can’t find it in my will to do so.
“What?” I snap into the phone.
“Sorry bad time?” I calm my breath down. I started shaking as the tears threatened to pool over.
“Sorry Vic. What’s up?”
“I just wanted to see how you were. I haven’t spoken to you in a while.” I frown and a tear rolls down my face.
“It’s okay. I’m shitty. But what about you?” he chuckles in the background. “Good. Actually, at our next venue, we were thinking about flying out to see you.” He says.
“Really?” my heartbeat picks up. No. they can’t. they can’t know what happened, I can’t let anyone know what happened.
“Really, I actually have a song written out and I wanted to pick back up with our song writing.” Maybe Vic is what I need to get my mind off Austin. Maybe being back in the process of writing and collaborating will take a stress load of shit off. But it won’t.
“Yea, that actually sounds nice.”
“So, where to meet? Your place?”
“No!” I yell, crying, almost braking the car in the process.
“Why”
“There’s this cliff. It’s where I was first asked out and it gives me ideas to write.” I say.
“Cool. So, I’ll call you when we land and we’ll go from there?”
“Yeah. Hey Vic?”
“Hmm.”
“I miss you.” What the hell Ellie? My brain practically screams. Now before you jump to conclusions, I miss him as a friend.
“I miss you too.” We hang up and I pull into the local Starbucks and I automatically see Devin. I sit in my car and just stare. I’m weak. It’s my fault I got raped in the first place. The tears still didn’t pool over, and it made me feel disgusting. When Austin finds out he’s going to hate me even more. I weakly smile and walk in. the doorbell chimes, indicating a new costumer. Devin looks up and sees me, I swear the color rushed up to his face. I smile and take a seat across from him.
“Devin.” I set my phone out on the table.
“Ellie. Man you’re even, prettier in real life.” He mumbles. “So, do you want to be signed to Sumerian?” he asks.
“Duh, like do you know how many bands I actually like that are signed there?” I fake smile.
“Uh, I don’t know. How many?”
“Asking Alexandria! Dayshell! Capture the Crown! Uh, I don’t know.” He chuckles. “But seriously. I would love too. How did you guys even hear about us?”
“Your cover of Underneath Every Smile. I love how you did the growls so deep you would think it’s a Death Growl. We love your voice actually and we listened to some of your songs and your demo EP. Can you do acoustic?” he asks.
“Duh, that’s how I write songs.” I smirk.
“Good. I would love to write a song with you someday. Do you think you could come by the studio?”
“I can. But I can only do clean vocals.” He looks at me. “I recently had heart surgery and they want me to take it easy.” The frown is now visible on my face. yeah. Take it easy. Too late for that. I may have to go back to the doctor. Then they’ll find out I’ve been raped without a…..
“That’s okay, because we want to add a bonus track out there. We have a song written called the Hardest Mistakes. We want Cassadee Pope to do it. But until she flies in, do you want to do cover for it? As in you do her vocals, then we do an acoustic cover of it. In our next album we’ll put those two songs on it, also the original copy with Cassadee’s vocals.” I was literally about to jump out my seat and scream. he fucking raped me without a condom. I’m gonna be pregnant and everyone is going to call me a whore and, and, and……
“Are you kidding me?! Of course I would freaking love too!”
“Okay, so when you come out. We’ll sing you and get to work.”
“Wait. Are you signing me as a band?”
“Yes. Why?”
“I want to also be signed as a solo artist.”
“Well, what about a Rise Records?”
“Oh, don’t worry. With the contract if the band breaks up, lead singer still gets signed.” I don’t know if Austin being drunk and telling me things is a good thing, but I have an outset future ahead of me.
“Well good. You should release a solo EP. Just in case.”
“I will.”
“Now, while we’re here, can I get you a coffee?” he asks.
“Sure. Surprise me.” he smiles and ruffs my hair as he leaves to get in line. My phone rings again and I noticed the time. Here in Long Beach, it’s six in the morning. So in L.A it’s nine. Hmm.
“Hello?” my voice actually has happiness in them.
“Ellie!” it’s Ryan.
“What?”
“Dude, you have to come back to Warped.” He says.
“I thought you guys we’re kicking me out the band?”
“What?”
“Austin.” I heard laughing in the background.
“Dude, that was drunk Shayley talking. Ignore Austin. But we want you at Warped. You have to see how awesome Shayley. He even found us a potential keyboard player.”
“Really? Look. I’ll try to fly out in time for the last three venues. Are we going to Warped in England?”
“Yes. We are. Because England is the first date of our Headline tour.”
“Count on me. Send some videos of you guys performing. I frigging miss you all.” There was a shuffle and then, “WE MISS YOU!!!” my band yells loud enough for people to give me stares. I shrug them off.
“Miss you all too. See you soon! Wait!” Ryan pauses.
“What?” tell him. You can tell them anything, they’re your band.
“Nothing.” I hang up.
“Here you go.” He sets down a steaming coffee cup in front of me and a blueberry muffin. I take a sip of the coffee and realize it as vanilla slash caramel mix.
“Mm. This is good. Do you always get this?” I ask while taking another sip.
“Yup.” He takes a bit of his muffin. I snatch it from hit and take a bite. I swallow and hand it back to him. “Pumpkin?” he takes my muffin and takes a huge bite.
“Hey!” I take a piece and throw it at him. He sticks his tongue out.
“So,” he takes a gulp. “I was wondering. Me and my band are going surfing this weekend. I wanted to know if you wanted to come and you can meet my band.” He looks at me. Should I? I mean if I go, then Austin is gonna be at me all month long….Austin.
Urg.
“Sure. Mind if I bring a friend?”
“Sure, who?” he asks while taking a sip of coffee.
“Vic Fuentes.” He laughs and begins to choke.
“Really? You know Vic Fuentes?”
“Yup. We’re song writing this weekend.”
“Well sure.” We eat the rest of our food and make small talk. About an hour later, I realized I should be heading home. I don’t want to go home. As Devin was getting up, I stopped him.
“Hey, do you think we could start the collab project now?” I ask eagerly.
“Well sure.” My phone rings and the caller I.D picture shows up.
Austin.
“Well, you want to get that? Your boyfriend could be worried.” I laughed.
“Definitely not my boyfriend.” I press END and follow Devin out.
I stood in front of the microphone in the studio booth as the track played out. I had the lyrics written on a piece of paper and I was about to sing Cassadee’s part.
So many reasons to live, I need to let them show. I’ve made the hardest mistakes, I need to let them go.
Devin’s vocals quickly replaced mine as the bridge was coming. The music was quickly filled and my part was coming. I love this sound. The vibe of this song. This is amazing. I felt the bridge end and my part came. I gave it my all.
Let yourself go. This is the only time to feel alive. This brings me out to you and I’ll say. I’ll scream it till my heart comes out of my chest. And leave it to the music to transcend the rest.This life is just a perfect fit.
So many reasons to live, I need to let them show. I’ve made the hardest mistakes; I need to let them go.
Devin’s vocals filled in again and the bridge. My adrenaline was pumping and right now, I feel like I could do anything. Especially with Devin singing along.
Let yourself go. This is the only time to feel alive. This brings me out to you and I’ll say.
Devin’s vocals mixed in with mine.
I’ll scream it till my heart comes out of my chest. And leave it to the music to transcend the rest.This life is just a perfect fit.
I’ll scream it till my heart comes out of my chest. And leave it to the music to transcend the rest.This life is just a perfect fit.
The music cut off and I was greeted by cheers and applauds.
“That was amazing!” Devin spoke through the other side. “Okay. So, there’s an interview you need to be at after going over things with Mark.” I nod. “He’ll be here I thirty minutes, so go nuts and look around.”
“Thanks Devin.” I take off the headphones and set them on the mic. I walk out of the studio and take a look around Sumerian. I hadn’t even noticed it was so close to my house. The building wasn’t as large as Rise, but it was big enough to get lost. Walking backwards I looked at the studio I just came out of. Records hangs on every wall. Guitars hanging by strings, pictures of bands on every other wall. Something bumps into me. As I was getting ready to apologize the thing speaks.
“Nice meeting you again.” The York accent speaks. I turn around and jump in his arms.
“Ben!” he crashes his lips against mine. “What are ya doing here?” I ask after pulling away.
“Interview. What are you doing here?”
“Guess who’s getting signed to Sumerian!” I put my hands up and shake them in a surprise kinda way.
“You are? Cool.”
“So, where’s the rest of your band?”
“Sound check. Doing some recording. Were you looking around?” he asks.
“Uhm, yeah I kinda was.” He laced his fingers through mine.
“I can show you around?” he asks.
“Sure.” I felt the blood rushing in my cheeks. You’re a slut, a whore. Get over it.
His words still taunt me. I’m not a slut, or am I?
Ben drags me and begins pointing out studios and records. he told me what each award meant and why certain guitars hang from the ceiling. At the end of the “tour” we reached the place where the interview would start. Sitting in a spinning chair was Mark.
“Ah! Ellie! Ben! Over here.” We walk over to where Mark sat. Mark is a man in his mid-thirties. He had shoulder length black hair and had a nose ring. He may be a pretty rad boss.
“Sup Mark.” I sat in a spinny chair next to him and Ben next to me, our hands still intwine.
“Sup. Okay, we’ll do the interview first, and then sign you. The interview is just me, you, and Ben. Okay?” I nod. A lady around thirty came in. she had long brown hair and bright green eyes. She was the definition of beautiful. Two camera men walked in and positioned themselves in front of us. I don’t know why, but they made me nervous. I started to bounce my knee and scratch my palm. My chair began to move towards the right. Ben was moving my chair closer to him. He leaned in and whispered in my ear.
“You okay?” he asks. I shrug my shoulders and he just takes a hold of my hand again. “It’ll be okay.”
“Okay, rolling.” The lady says in her fake high pitch voice. “Hi. I’m Katherine. And we’re here with Ben Bruce from Asking Alexandria, Mark, owner of Sumerian records and Gielle,”
“Ellie,” Ben interrupts. She rolls her eyes.
“Ellie new artist to Sumerian Records, from Sorry Not Sorry. So tell me Ellie,” she smirks at me. “How does it feel to be signed.”
“Well good. There’s some nice people. Like Devin, we’re working on a song currently. And Ben and I have some history,” he squeezes my hand and I chuckle under my breath. “And it feels awesome.”
“I hear you have a brother.”
“Yeah, David Schmitt from Breathe Carolina.”
“Is he like the annoying brother?”
“Not at all. He’s nice and very passionate when it comes to his girlfriend Lynzie Blair.” Ugh. She’s such a gold digger. I can hear Ben and Mark snickering in the background.
“Ben!” her voice literally gives me a headache. “I hear you’re working on some new music. Can you spill any deets?”
“Well actually we can. We’re flying back out to England because unfortunately, All Time Low can’t make it to the Headline tour.” I gasp. What? I thought that All Time Low we’re conformed for the tour! “So Asking Alexandria are taking their place at the last minute.”
“Okay, so whose on the tour and what’s the tour name?” she flicked her finger nails and narrowed her eyes at me.
“The name of the tour has been tossed around some, but the name of it is now, The Reckless Brave Tour. Headlining it will be Sorry Not Sorry and the first show is at London. Tonight Alive, Of Mice & Men, my band and Ellie’s and are the four touring.” He shows a toothy grin and I swear that lady was sending me death glares.
“Mark. Any advice for the bands and any upcoming bands?” he looks at me.
“Ellie, any advice?” and suddenly the panic rises. All the pressure is on me. it’s up to me to say the right thing. But either way, anything I say, the woman will glare at me. I can go ahead and say it and get it out the way and panic somewhere or panic right now and choke to death on my words.
“Stay Kellin Quinn.”
~Ben~
Was she having a panic attack? The way she squeezed my hand, it was as if she was going to break it. Hehe.
I’m gonna hold your hand so tight, I’m gonna break my wrist.
I’ve got to stop listening to Pierce the Veil.
“Stay Kellin Quinn.” She said. The interviewer gave her a “what the fuck” look and Mark was laughing his ass off in the corner. I chuckle deeply as I was trying to hide the laugh that wanted to burst through. Watching Ellie through the interview was amazing, I mean not to sound like a fucking perv or anything. I never fall for any of my hookups. But Ellie, she’s different. I love how when she giggles or laughs, her shoulders bounce and her hair jiggles. Or is it the other way around? Oh, when she blushes at a comment, she tries to hide her face in her hair. It’s fucking adorable. Maybe I should ask her out for coffee or something.
Nah, I’m Ben Bruce. I don’t get nervous.
But fuck, I am nervous.
“Okay, before we go, we got some questions asked in by Twitter.” Ellie tries to divert her attention away from the interviewer’s eyes. “Ellie,” the lady points her perfectly manicured nail at her.
“Fuck.” She hisses.
“@megansmith23 asked is it true you and Austin Carlile are dating?” the interviewer was basically at the edge of her chair. I knew that wasn’t a real Twitter question. Obviously this lady knew Austin and wants to know
“I think your mouth should be quite, cause it never speaks the truth.”She said quoting With Ears To See And Eyes To Hear.
“What?” the interviewer snaps.
“What?” Ellie asks back.
Silence from the interviewer.
Silence from Ellie.
“Next question,” they go through a round of questions between the two of us and I find out quite the works about her. She and Austin used to date. Currently single (duh!), went skinny dipping quite the numerous amounts of time. I noticed as she was flailing her arms around, the sleeve of her jackets slipped and through the space of the bracelet, I saw scars lining her wrists.
“Okay, that’s the end of this interview. See you guys next time.” And they cut the camera. I walk over to Ellie who is now signing some sort of papers.
“Okay Ellie, welcome to Sumerian Records!!” he pulls a tube out his pocket and pulls the string. Confetti pops in her face and she jumps in surprise.
“Thanks?” she goes in and hugs Mark. He walks away and she turns to me.
“So,” Her phone rings and she answers it. She groans. "Sorry Ben gotta go.” She gives me a sly smile as she walks away.

It's cool.

~Ellie~
One month since it all happened and I’ve been staying at Devin’s place in Michigan. I left without any trace of where I could’ve been. I took like five different pregnancy test and they all came back negative. I don’t know how, but I’m just glad. Everyone has been calling me nonstop and telling me to come visit them. So when I did, I stayed for a week. In my room, not bothering anyone because I no longer cared about myself anymore. I’ve lost weight, my hair and skin color are fading. So much you can see my veins. My thighs are nothing but red and raw from all the blood loss due to a razor being sliced across my skin over and over. I haven’t showered in a week and I smell like shit. The bruises from where joshed touched me are finally starting to fade, the main reason why I wore a lot of long sleeve cotton sweatshirts. I haven’t talked to Ben in a while, my eyes are bloodshot, and my band and brother will be home in two weeks. So I left again. Packed up another bag and stayed at a hotel. I left without an trace.

Notes

Maybe like six or less chapters left in this story. Do you think I should do a sequel? It isn't written out like this story so if I do one, it take a while because I will have to write it. Leave your suggestions.