My Understandings

“Pst. Austin.” Groaning, I turned over in my bunk and fold the pillow over my ears. “Austin….” I kicked the sheets and turned face forward.
“Shut up Alan.”
“Austin!” I turned over and fell out the bunk, landing with a thud to the ground from my top bunk. My phone fell a few seconds later, hitting me on the head. I picked it up, seeing a call was on.
“Hello?”
“Bout time you woke up.”
“Ellie? What are you…..” I pulled my ear away from the phone. The screen lit up and showed the time for the call. Eight hours.
This is gonna be one hell of a phone bill.
“Well silly, you fell asleep on the phone. Well, I fell asleep firs then you and uh………hey?” aw! She’s stuttering.
“Hey, while I have you. There’s a bonfire later on today after we check into the hotel.”
“Hotel?”
“Yup.” I say while popping the “p”. “Since we leave tomorrow, we’ll stay at the hotel and leave at night.”
“So is today performance day or an off day?”
“Off day! Now Shhhh! I’m trying to talk!” I heard her giggle and the fluttery feeling in my stomach returned. It’s been two years fluttery feelings! Where have ya been? “Anyway, after we check in the hotel, me and the guys, along with Kellin and his crew, Oliver and the guys, probably Beau, I don’t know. Your brother and Kyle, We Are In the Crowd and Blood On the Dance Floor. Oh! And Vic and the guys It’s supposed to be fun. Probably beer pong though. Then afterwards, we’re going to a club a few blocks away from the hotel.”
“Sounds cool.”
“So, I wanted to know if you were coming.”
“Sure! But that’s a lot of people.”
“Yeah, some are leaving early, some are just staying to perform in that town.” I can see her mouth making an “o” shape. “I also wanted to know if you wanted to get some lunch…..uhm, with me. I mean it’s okay if you don’t I understand.”
“Of course silly. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”
“Wait!” I heard s familiar voice in the background. Shayley? “Are you listening to The Flood?”
“Oh, uh yeah. I’ll explain during lunch. Now let me change or I won’t make it!”
“Goodbye Ellie.”
“Bye Austin.”
~Ellie~
His voice worried me. The way he said bye reminded me of those two years ago when he broke up with me. I shook my head of the thought and went to go get change. Nervously I walked back to the bunks and found Miley scrolling through her phone. I know she’s still mad at me, but she should at least know her boyfriend’s here.
“Hey Miley?”
“What Ellie?” she snapped. I tried not to throw my anger at her, knowing it would only make the problem even worse than it is.
“There’s a bonfire today and then we’re heading to a club and I wanted to let you know that Oliver and the guys are here and are coming tonight.” I grabbed some clothes and went to change. I switch bras and settled for a hot pink sports bra. Perfect for the shirt I’m wearing. I slipped on a purple tank top that was ripped on the sides all the way down to my hips. I slipped on some black ripped pants and my pair of Warped Vans. I walked in my bunk and grabbed 50 dollars and my skeleton head phones. I put my music on shuffled and walked out the bus and searched for the black tour bus with the green Monster Energy claw marks and the giant Of Mie & Men sign painted on the front and sign. A song that I loved dearly began to play and I drowned myself in Danny’s screaming in Dear Insanity. Man do I want to meet Asking Alexandria. It took five minutes, but I found the black tour bus. By then, a new song had popped up.
Sharewithme by Dayshell.
Hmmm.
I knocked on the door and two seconds later, a ginger snatched my wrist and pulled me into a huge hug.
“Ellie, I am so freaking sorry.” His arms went all the way around my waist and his hands rest on my bare skin. I chuckle a little then gently shove him away.
“It’s okay Alan. Austin explained everything.” He gave me a sly smile.
“So……we’re cool?” he scratched the back of his neck, cigarette pack in his hand.
“Yeah. So where’s Austin?” I ask.
“In the back.” I nod and make my way back there. Another hand snatches my wrist pulling me into their bunk and giving me a strong hug.
“Hey Tino!” he picks me up and squeezes me tighter.
“Don’t ever disappear off the face of the planet again! I was going to kick Austin’s ass for what he did!” I chuckled as he set me down.
“No kidding. Your brother almost killed him on stage.” I turned around and Phil was smiling at me.
“Phillip!” I run and jump into his arms. His hands support me as I hug him for dear life.
“So, my brother was going all maniac on him? Was he drunk?” I asked trying to change the subject. Alan and Tino gave me weird looks before shaking their heads.
“No, just really pissed. It was funny actually. Tiny David against monster size Austin.” Tino chuckle.
“Hey, I hear female voices!” Aaron busted through the bunks and I ran and hugged him, quickly of course. “Nice to know you didn’t die.” I laugh and punch his arm.
“Why do you guys assume when you don’t hear from me, I’m automatically dead?” Phil opens his mouth to speak but is cut off.
“Because their dodo heads.” Austin says. He’s dressed in a Create and Aspire tank top and black skinny jeans. He holds his hand out for me.
“Let’s get lunch!” I wave by to the guys and we walk out the bus hand in hand. It was fairly hot in Houston, so I had to pull my hand out of Austin’s. They were beginning to sweat, not good. He throws an arm over my shoulder and we stalk out to the streets.
“So, hamburgers or tacos?” he asks.
“Erm, hamburgers? I’ve eaten way too many tacos with Vic.” Out of the corner of my eye, I see his eyes give away a hint of anger, but they are soon replaced with, happiness.
“Burger King it is.” Turns out Burger King wasn’t as far as i thought it would be. Austin goes up to order for us and I put my headphones back in. I un-pause the song and see it is still on Sharewithme. Who is Dayshell? Austin comes back a few seconds later and I decide to ask him.
“Austin, who’s Dayshell?” his hands ball up in fists and the glint of anger comes back. He must didn’t see me look at him because his eyes are now glinting with confusion.
“I don’t know.” He lies. Austin is a terrible liar. But I shrug it off when he leaves to go get the food. He doesn’t order much for me, thank God, only a small fry. But he still makes me eat whether I want to or not. I eat a couple, noticing Austin watching me.
“So, when did you get your sleeve done?” my small tattoos I already had when me and Austin were dating. The only new thing was my sleeve and dream catcher.
“About a year after we broke up.” That’s all I dared to say. The real reason behind it was because I felt numb all the time. I felt like I wasn’t pretty enough to keep Austin, I knew I wouldn’t be pretty enough to keep anybody. After self-harming myself, I need something more permanent, more painful, with more meaning. So I went to the tattoo parlor to get my sleeve done and when they asked me what I wanted I replied with “Something that takes a long time. Something that has the most pain. Something that screams broken person.” Somehow the lady managed to tie roses, quotes, skulls,and key chains into an amazing sleeve work.
“That’s amazing work. Love how it goes with your pink sports bra. What do they mean?” I choked on the fry that I was chewing.
“Erm, it’s nothing special….”
“Ellie……” I quickly check my phone and realize it’s getting late.
“Hey! It’s already four! Let’s go see if the bonfire has started!” I quickly get up and toss my fries into the trash. I speed walk down the side walk back into the venue. As I began to do steady jog I hear Austin’s shouts for me to stop. But I don’t. I keep running into I bump into someone.
“Ouch.” It was a female.
“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry!” I panic and help her up. I notice all the commotion running around here.
“It’s okay. Are you running from someone?”
“Ellie!” Austin shouts were getting closer.
“Yes.” I squeaked.
“Well, come with me. We’ll hid by the Tilly’s stage.” I nodded and we run towards the stage, which seems to be further then we thought. We crouch down by the cooler on the side stage when Austin’s shouts we’re basically in front of us. “So, what’s your name?” she asks. The brown hair and the nose ring was the first thing to catch my attention. It’s like everyone at Warped has a nose ring. Her hair is straight with blonde streaks.
“Ellie.” I whisper as Austin searches by the stage. “I’m from the band Sorry Not Sorry.”
“Cool! I love your work.” She whispers back.
“Who are you?”
“I’m Taylor Jardine. From We Are The In Crowd.”
“Man, another girl and I didn’t know? Where have you been this past summer?” I jokily ask.
“I could be asking you the same thing.” Austin was basically right in front of us. Luckily the stairs provided a great hide out and the cooler kept our hair out of sight.
“What’s all the commotion around here?”
“Well, Danny and Ben from Asking Alexandria popped by for a visit and their going clubbing with us.” I squeal out of excitement and Taylor puts a hand over my mouth as Austin stops for a moment.
“Shhhh. Okay, anyway yeah.” Finally I would get to meet Asking Alexandria, well, two fifths of Asking Alexandria.
“Dammit Ellie. I’ll just call her.” Taylor looked at me the same time I did.
“Run?” she suggested.
“Run.” I confirmed her. as soon as we backed away from the cooler, my phone began playing The Depths. Austin look back at the cooler but we were half way from the stage. I was giggling like a five year old and Taylor was throwing middle fingers at anyone who dared looked at us. I tripped over a pebble, yes a pebble, and fell into someone’s arms.
“Better watch yourself.” An accent spoke to me. It wasn’t as thick as Matt’s or Oliver’s, but you could tell it was there. I removed myself from the person’s arms to find a guy with brown-ginger like shoulder length straight hair. He has two lips rings on the corner of his lips and if it wasn’t for the fact that I listen to his music, I would’ve never thought it was him.
“Thanks.” I say, now wishing my shirt wasn’t so revealing. But hey, it’s Ben Bruce!
“What’s your name?” he asks, leaning against a tour bus.
“I don’t know. What’s yours?” I tease. Crossing my arms below my boobs. He chuckles as he pulls a cigarette out. He turns the pack my way and I take one. He lights them both up and leans back again.
“Cocky aren’t we? Doll face, you as well as everyone else know who I am. Just like everyone else, they know who you are. I’ve heard a lot about people, to make sure I got the right person, you gotta tell me your name.” I inhale the bitter sweet toxic of the nicotine. I blow a puff of smoke in his face as I speak.
“Ellie.” I smile. All of a sudden, my cocky side has come back. I wish it would go away, seriously, if I were to have a panic attack right here and now.....
“See, wasn’t that hard was it.” His smirk disappears as I feel a presence behind me.
“Ellie.” It was Austin. I decided to ignore him and continue talking to Ben.
“So, does Ellie have a last name?” he asks in a third point of view.
“I don’t know. It all depends. Does Ben have a last name?”
“Actually, he does, it’s Bruce and her last name is Schmitt. As in David’s little sister.” Austin interferes. Ben takes another drag of the cigarette and blows the smoke in Austin’s direction.
“So, are you going to the bar later on tonight?” he asks me, oblivious of Austin’s annoying snickers and comments.
“Actually, I am. Will I have the pleasure of seeing you there?” I ask. While stomping my cigarette on the ground.
“It depends. Will I have the pleasure to buy you a drink if I do?” he leans in on me, even though Austin is watching. He takes in another drag.
“For sure.” He leans on me even more and kisses me, in front of Austin. The smoke and nicotine entering my body.. Soon, he pulls away. I felt slightly guilty, Kissing Ben, well, Ben kissing me in front of Austin.
“See you tonight Ellie.” He smirks at me and walks away. Austin turns me around to face him
“What the-”
“Ellie!” Taylor’s voice rings. She runs in my direction and directs me away from Austin to the now growing fire. “Tell me what happened. Make it quick too! I want to go shopping with you for the bar tonight.” I nod and explain what happened between Ben and I.
"Ben? Bruce? Well, I hope you know, expect nothing more but a hook up with him."
"Wasn't planning on it. Who passes up the chance to hook up with your celebrity idol."
"Well, he's a player. I'm just saying, be careful."
"Well, I know, but, I really wish I could get over this thing between me and Austin. otherwise, I wouldn't be in this whole mess." I sigh.
"Maybe tonight will be the night he realizes he needs you just as much as you need him." I looked back at Austin talking to a girl.
"I hope."

Notes

Oooo, what will happen? Will Austin pull up his big boy pants or will Ellie pull up her big girl pants first? Will she and Ben hook up and Austin gets jealous? Or will he just let her slip through like he did all those years ago?