The next day, I woke up with a smile on my face. For the first time, the thought of Shayley didn't hurt so bad. After three years of mourning my first love, my first kiss, and my first time, I was finally getting my life back on track. I wasn't going to let him rule over me anymore.

I stretched a bit, then sat up and checked my phone. I had a missed text from Austin.

Carlile:
Can you hang out?

I typed a quick reply, telling him I'd be over in an hour, then got up and walked into the bathroom. The bags under my eyes had reduced a little bit and my hair wasn't too awful looking. I braided a few pieces around my head put on some makeup. After I was somewhat satisfied with that, I opened my closet and pawed through my clothes. I wanted something that said, I'm-not-trying-to-impress-you-but-I-don't-want-you-to-think-I'm-a-slob.

I ended up with a gray shirt, a pair of ripped skinny jeans, and a pair of black sneakers. I grabbed my backpack and my keys and got in my car. I drove over to Austin's place, then scrambled to the door. I knocked three times.

He opened the door with a grin on his face. "Hey, Addie."

"Hey, Carlile," I smiled as he backed up so I could push past him. I took off my backpack and my shoes, then set them by the door, and continued to the living room. I sat down on the big leather sofa as Austin shuffled back in and sat beside me.

"Where's the rest of the guys?" I asked. I assumed we were all going to hang out, not just Austin and I.

"They left to get food. We pulled an all-nighter trying to write music and I haven't gone grocery shopping yet," he explained.

I smiled and pulled my knees to my chest. "I think you conveniently sent them away so you could suck up without them thinking you're a pussy."

"That, too," He chuckled. "So, what do you want to do?"

"Hmmm..." I bit my lip. "We could play truth or dare when the guys get back."

"We'll do that," he smirked. "But what do you want to do right now?"

"You want to watch Star Wars again don't you?" I groaned.

He grinned and nodded. I sighed as he got up and put in one of the Star Wars movies. He sat back down and I snuggled into my best friend's side as the previews played. Soon after, the movie started and I watched for the first half hour. Then, I fell asleep.

"Addie. Addie!" Austin started to tickle me.

My eyes snapped open and I threw my face into his chest.

"STOP!" I squealed.

"Finally," he grinned. "You're awake."

"Only because you tickled me you evil bastard," I pouted.

He rolled his eyes with a smile. "The guys are going to be here with the pizza in a few minutes. Get up and fix your hair before they think I boned you," he winked.

I slowly got up and walked into the restroom. I looked at what could only be described as sex hair. I looked in the drawer for the brush I used to keep here before the Gielle thing. I dug through the bottom drawer and found my yellow hairbrush. I quickly ran it through my hair and wiped the sleep from my eyes. I went to put the brush back and saw a small piece of metal in the bottom of the drawer. I picked it up and spun it between my fingers.

I haven't used one of these in years. I pulled my shirt up and saw the healing scars on my ribs. I wanted to cry at the thought that Austin had done that to himself, but I slipped the small razor into my pocket and decided to ask him about it later.

I walked back into the living room where all the guys were sitting on the floor with a pizza box in the middle. Austin and Phil both scooted over so I could sit between them. Austin handed me a smaller piece of pizza since he knew that my eyes were bigger than my stomach.

We all ate pizza in comfortable silence, and when everyone was done, we began our game of truth or dare.

"If we're gonna do this, we've got to play like adults," Alan smirked, setting a bottle of vodka in the middle of the circle.

"Okay. Addie. Truth or dare?" Alan smirked at me.

"Truth," I said

"How many guys have you slept with?" Alan asked.

I grabbed the bottle and took a sip. I had only slept with two, but then they'd want to know and I wasn't prepared to tell them who. The guys all yelled pussy and I looked around the circle. "Tino. Truth or dare?"

"Dare," he grinned at me.

An evil thought came to mind. "I dare you to run around the block in nothing but your underwear."

Tino stood up and slipped his clothes off. The guys and I were all laughing at hid tidy whities and followed him out onto the porch. Tino started running and since it was sunset there were still people out. He ran past an elderly couple and two girls who tried to get his autograph. He finally got back to the porch panting, and we were laughing our asses off. We finally went inside and got back to the game. After about an hour of truth or dare, we were all pretty drunk and most of the guys had passed out already.

Austin was the only one awake. He and I were sitting in the middle of the room drinking Sprite and talking. I pulled the razor out of my pocket and decided to ask him about it.

"Austin," I sighed. "I know."

"Know about what?" He smiled.

I held up the razor and the smile fell. "I do it, too, Aus. I know it's hard, but we can help each other. You just have to let me in."

He looked down at his hands, "Yeah. Okay."

I gave him a small smile, "Can I see yours?"

He sighed and pulled up his basketball shorts. There were so many angry, red lines mixed in with older, varying degrees of healed ones. I let out a small gasp and he looked straight into my eyes. I smiled at him reassuringly and pulled up my shirt just enough for him to see the scars that littered my ribs. A tear slipped from my eye and he pulled me into his arms, sobbing quietly into my shoulder.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I woke up the next morning in Austin's bed. Austin's arms were wrapped around me and I felt better about everything that had happened last night.

"Hi," I whispered.

His eyes fluttered open. "Hi," he grinned.

"I'm hungry," I batted my eyelashes.

"Pancakes?"

"Still my favorite, Aus," I grinned.

We made our way into the kitchen. I sat down at the table and he started making pancakes.

"You're glowing," Alan winked, sitting down next to me.

I rolled my eyes. "Austin's my best friend. We didn't do anything."

"You hair sure seems to disagree," he smirked.

I ran my fingers through my hair, trying to tame it. "Whatever. I don't need to prove to you whether I did or didn't do something."

We sat in silence for a few moments. Alan sat studying me and I memorized all the smudges in the glass on the windows. "He likes you, you know," he whispered.

"No, he doesn't," I sighed.

"You like him, don't you?" He raised his brows.

"No, I don't," I glared at him.

He bit back a grin and got up, "Yeah. Okay."

He left the room and soon after, Austin walked in with two plates stacked high with pancakes. Mine were shaped like hexagons, just like I liked. I knew it was weird, but it was mine and Austin's special thing. Hexagon pancakes.

"How are they?" He asked through a mouthful of pancakes.

"Yummy," I grinned.

He frowned. "I was going for divine," he winked.

"You are so gay sometimes, Aus," I giggled. "I'm surprised you and Alan haven't hooked up yet."

Austin groaned. "Oh, God. The whole fandom ships "Austlan Cashby" and I see pictures of us that I don't even remember us taking."

I laughed, "That's adorable."

"Not when you're in love with a girl and half the population of Warped Tour thinks you're gay," he mumbled.

"Oooohhhhh... Who's the girl?" I nugded him with my elbow.

"It doesn't matter," he dismissed it and I let it go. Obviously it was a sore subject.

"Okay," I said, standing up and throwing my plates in the sink. "Tino! Phil! Gingy! Get in here!"

Tino and Phil shuffled in behind Alan with half-open eyes, obviously still tired.

"Okay, boys. We have one week until we have to be in Australia, but they're having a small hometown concert in Sheffield two days before that, so we're leaving in tomorrow night. It's only a week's worth of touring, so you don't need to pack much. Go home. Pack whatever you think you'll need. Then, pack another couple days worth of clothes, two pairs of shoes, and all your valuables into a carry on. Trust me, you'll thank me when you don't have to fly home without your laptop wearing my clothes."

The boys all mumbled their okays and hugged Austin and I. After they had all left, it was just Austin and I.

"Are you leaving?" He pouted.

"Hell no," I chuckled. "I can pack in fifteen minutes and be done. I'm not giving up alone time with my best friend."

"Good," he smiled and sat next to me where I had plopped down on the couch. He held his arms open and I snuggled into his side. I really missed this. Snuggling with Austin and watching mediocre daytime TV.

"Are you excited?" He asked.

"Of course," I smiled. "A week with all my favorite guys? Getting to see Phil drunk off his ass? I'm going to be happy just to get out of this godforsaken town."

"Me, too," he smiled. "Me, too."

Notes

Song Credit: Coffee & Cigarettes - Never Shout Never
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