Red
Epilogue
Warped came to a close much quicker than I would have liked. Before I knew it people were saying their goodbyes and packing to head home. I was thankful that I had had this experience and sad to see it go. I couldn’t help but feel emotional as I stood side stage for the last few times, shared laughs in the back lounge, danced around with Jack, drank with the guys, and played guitar on stage with Alex.
Austin had seemed off since the visit with his dad. It seemed like he was struggling with something internally and I was dying to ask but I didn’t want to pry.
The guys had thrown me an amazing birthday party and Austin had someone found the prettiest silver bracelet for me. We had spent the whole night dressed to the nines and dancing to cheesy pop music. I couldn’t have asked for anything more. This had truly been the best summer of my life.
And here I was standing on the bus packing my bags to go back to Char’s.
“What’s this?”
I turned to see Austin holding a piece of notebook paper and I smiled knowing what it was.
“Oh, that’s something I wrote awhile back…” I mumbled awkwardly.
“Is this a poem?” He asked.
“Yeah…”
Smiling, he read the piece of paper out loud:
“The sound they make together is deafening, like the engine of a speeding Ferrari.
Boys and girls of all ages, sardines packed into this outdoor space, arms starched towards the heavens.
It’s a black heavy thunder cloud that holds five men, the Gods, each carrying their weapon of choice
And as they start to praise their followers with their piercing gift, the shrieks only grow louder.
Their leader seems to dance on air as he cries in a language only these children seem to understand
He’s a hungry monster feeding off their energy and excitement.
Some of the followers begin to dance at the Gods direction, their bodies like Ping-Pong balls and their limbs flailing
Some scream in what only seems like pure agony; tears streaming down their beat read faces,
Others stand, yelling with power, hands making codes in the air, the warriors of the tribe.
It’s a love. It’s a religion for these people. This is who they are. This is what they believe in.”
“It’s called Cult.” I said taking it back from him. “I was inspired watching you guys play for your fans.”
“That was really good.” Austin smiled. “What else have you written?”
“I keep a little journal of poems and songs and random thoughts.” I shrugged. “I’ll let you read it some time.”
He smiled handing it back to me and I placed it into my suitcase.
“I still can’t believe it’s the last day…” I said looking around the tour bus.
“I know. I wanted to talk to you actually.” Austin said.
My stomach dropped as he led me over to the couch in the front lounge and I slowly sank down next to him.
“Rae, you know I love you, right?”
“Yes…”
“I think we should take a little break for a few weeks.” He said it quickly, looking down at our clasped hands which rested in his lap.
“What?” I breathed.
“I just need some space right now. I feel like…I don’t know how I feel. I feel like this happened so fast and we jumped into this and I just want some time to figure stuff out. Ya know? I think it’d be good for both of us.”
I nodded slowly. He was making sense. We had rushed into things awfully quickly. We had made out the first night we met for fuck’s sake.
“But I don’t want to stop hanging out or talking to you. I just don’t want to be together, together right now. I’m sorry I sprang this up on you like this.”
“Austin, it’s fine.” I said smiling sadly. “I get it. Honestly, it almost makes sense to me.”
“Really?” He smiled wide when I said that.
“Yeah, I mean. I have a bunch of shit to figure out to too. I mean I came on this tour after just getting back on my feet with Nick and I don’t want to have anything with you, unless it’s absolutely perfect.”
He grabbed my face with his hands and kissed me hard. “I love you, Raegan. So much.”
“I love you too, Austin.”
“I was so fucking scared to talk to you about this.” He laughed. “Thank you for being so understanding. I promise you that once we figure everything out we’ll be right back together.”
“Don’t worry, Austin. I know that.”
“I’m sorry about what happened when my dad was here. I was just feeling that things had been going so fast between us and I wanted to slow things down and he was there inviting you down to the house and practically trying to move us in together and that’s just not what I want right now. I’ve made a lot of mistakes in the past going too quickly in relationships.”
“Austin, really. I’m okay. Don’t worry so much.” I assured him.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
“You okay?” I looked over at Alan who was sitting in the seat next to me and gave him a smile.
“Yeah…yeah I am.”
“You might have to hold my hand through this. I fucking hate flying.”
I giggled making sure my phone was off and got comfy in the plane seat. I sighed and thought back to that morning saying goodbye to Jack, Alex, Tino, Phil, Aaron, and Austin. Hard had been an understatement. I had bawled my eyes out for close to two hours. I hated goodbyes, especially when you didn’t know when you’d see each other again.
I was glad that Alan had decided to come to San Francisco to see his parents. I don’t think I would have been able to say goodbye to him too and sit on this plane alone.
“What’s the deal with you and Austco?” He asked.
“I guess we’re done right now.” I said with a shrug. “He said he wants to be together again eventually and still be friends until then.”
“You guys going to be able to do that?” Alan asked with a laugh.
“Hopefully. I mean, I get where he’s coming from completely and I think that I could definitely use some time to sort out my life. I don’t want to be in a relationship when I myself am still in shambles, ya know? That’s not fair to him. I didn’t think I was going to meet anyone when I went out there. I just thought I was going to see Jack and Alex and I wound up making out with Austin the first night.”
Alan laughed shaking his head. “You guys are ridiculous.”
“I know.” I said with a laugh.
“Take a picture with me.” He said picking up his phone as I leaned in next to him and smiled. He snapped it and a moment later uploaded it to Instagram with the caption: ‘Goodbye Summer. Hello SanFran with @Rae_Jones’
“Are you going to hang out with me while you’re in the area?” I asked with a wink.
“Are you kidding? Of course not. I hate you.”
I laughed, “I hate you too.”
He smiled at me and I leaned my head on his shoulder slowly falling asleep.
Sequel: The Moment I Knew
Austin had seemed off since the visit with his dad. It seemed like he was struggling with something internally and I was dying to ask but I didn’t want to pry.
The guys had thrown me an amazing birthday party and Austin had someone found the prettiest silver bracelet for me. We had spent the whole night dressed to the nines and dancing to cheesy pop music. I couldn’t have asked for anything more. This had truly been the best summer of my life.
And here I was standing on the bus packing my bags to go back to Char’s.
“What’s this?”
I turned to see Austin holding a piece of notebook paper and I smiled knowing what it was.
“Oh, that’s something I wrote awhile back…” I mumbled awkwardly.
“Is this a poem?” He asked.
“Yeah…”
Smiling, he read the piece of paper out loud:
“The sound they make together is deafening, like the engine of a speeding Ferrari.
Boys and girls of all ages, sardines packed into this outdoor space, arms starched towards the heavens.
It’s a black heavy thunder cloud that holds five men, the Gods, each carrying their weapon of choice
And as they start to praise their followers with their piercing gift, the shrieks only grow louder.
Their leader seems to dance on air as he cries in a language only these children seem to understand
He’s a hungry monster feeding off their energy and excitement.
Some of the followers begin to dance at the Gods direction, their bodies like Ping-Pong balls and their limbs flailing
Some scream in what only seems like pure agony; tears streaming down their beat read faces,
Others stand, yelling with power, hands making codes in the air, the warriors of the tribe.
It’s a love. It’s a religion for these people. This is who they are. This is what they believe in.”
“It’s called Cult.” I said taking it back from him. “I was inspired watching you guys play for your fans.”
“That was really good.” Austin smiled. “What else have you written?”
“I keep a little journal of poems and songs and random thoughts.” I shrugged. “I’ll let you read it some time.”
He smiled handing it back to me and I placed it into my suitcase.
“I still can’t believe it’s the last day…” I said looking around the tour bus.
“I know. I wanted to talk to you actually.” Austin said.
My stomach dropped as he led me over to the couch in the front lounge and I slowly sank down next to him.
“Rae, you know I love you, right?”
“Yes…”
“I think we should take a little break for a few weeks.” He said it quickly, looking down at our clasped hands which rested in his lap.
“What?” I breathed.
“I just need some space right now. I feel like…I don’t know how I feel. I feel like this happened so fast and we jumped into this and I just want some time to figure stuff out. Ya know? I think it’d be good for both of us.”
I nodded slowly. He was making sense. We had rushed into things awfully quickly. We had made out the first night we met for fuck’s sake.
“But I don’t want to stop hanging out or talking to you. I just don’t want to be together, together right now. I’m sorry I sprang this up on you like this.”
“Austin, it’s fine.” I said smiling sadly. “I get it. Honestly, it almost makes sense to me.”
“Really?” He smiled wide when I said that.
“Yeah, I mean. I have a bunch of shit to figure out to too. I mean I came on this tour after just getting back on my feet with Nick and I don’t want to have anything with you, unless it’s absolutely perfect.”
He grabbed my face with his hands and kissed me hard. “I love you, Raegan. So much.”
“I love you too, Austin.”
“I was so fucking scared to talk to you about this.” He laughed. “Thank you for being so understanding. I promise you that once we figure everything out we’ll be right back together.”
“Don’t worry, Austin. I know that.”
“I’m sorry about what happened when my dad was here. I was just feeling that things had been going so fast between us and I wanted to slow things down and he was there inviting you down to the house and practically trying to move us in together and that’s just not what I want right now. I’ve made a lot of mistakes in the past going too quickly in relationships.”
“Austin, really. I’m okay. Don’t worry so much.” I assured him.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
“You okay?” I looked over at Alan who was sitting in the seat next to me and gave him a smile.
“Yeah…yeah I am.”
“You might have to hold my hand through this. I fucking hate flying.”
I giggled making sure my phone was off and got comfy in the plane seat. I sighed and thought back to that morning saying goodbye to Jack, Alex, Tino, Phil, Aaron, and Austin. Hard had been an understatement. I had bawled my eyes out for close to two hours. I hated goodbyes, especially when you didn’t know when you’d see each other again.
I was glad that Alan had decided to come to San Francisco to see his parents. I don’t think I would have been able to say goodbye to him too and sit on this plane alone.
“What’s the deal with you and Austco?” He asked.
“I guess we’re done right now.” I said with a shrug. “He said he wants to be together again eventually and still be friends until then.”
“You guys going to be able to do that?” Alan asked with a laugh.
“Hopefully. I mean, I get where he’s coming from completely and I think that I could definitely use some time to sort out my life. I don’t want to be in a relationship when I myself am still in shambles, ya know? That’s not fair to him. I didn’t think I was going to meet anyone when I went out there. I just thought I was going to see Jack and Alex and I wound up making out with Austin the first night.”
Alan laughed shaking his head. “You guys are ridiculous.”
“I know.” I said with a laugh.
“Take a picture with me.” He said picking up his phone as I leaned in next to him and smiled. He snapped it and a moment later uploaded it to Instagram with the caption: ‘Goodbye Summer. Hello SanFran with @Rae_Jones’
“Are you going to hang out with me while you’re in the area?” I asked with a wink.
“Are you kidding? Of course not. I hate you.”
I laughed, “I hate you too.”
He smiled at me and I leaned my head on his shoulder slowly falling asleep.
Sequel: The Moment I Knew
Notes
I know some of you probably saw "epilogue" and panicked thinking this was the end of Raegan and Austin but I promise you, it's not! I shall post the next chapter of the sequel to this story tomorrow entitled "The Moment I Knew." I'm considering on taking the story even further but we can chat about that after I've got everything up.I just wanted to thank you for all the support and comments on this story! It's been amazing to be in the top four of the popular chart because of your votes and comments. This is the second time I've shared this story with people and this is probably the best review it's ever gotten so I just want to thank all of you who commented after every update and have enjoyed it so much.
I can tell you that this saga only gets more drama filled and plot twisted from here and I hope all of you enjoy what I have in store for you next! Come back tomorrow for the sequel (:
Best Wishes!
Shylah <3
9/17/13