"Are you going out for Halloween?"

"No. I'm not a very big fan of the dark and things popping out at me right now."

"Oh, shit, right. Sorry, I'm such an idiot for even ask-"

"No, don't worry about it, Austin. I'm a big girl."

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean it's okay to talk about it so soon. I mean, come on, Cameron, you got freaking ra-"

"Please, don't say it."

"...shit, sorry, Cameron. I had a few beers and-"

"Just go out with Alan and have fun, okay? I'm going to stay back and hand out candy."

"Are you okay with being alone? You have your phone, right?"

"Yes, now go! No more dwaddling. Have fun. It's Halloween!"

I woke up to barking and a constant knocking on a door. I knew where the barking was coming from, but because of the five year old dead asleep in my arms, and the want to not wake her up after all that had been going on, I just groaned and shushed the Boston Terrier.

"Parker, hush! Kena is still sleeping."

But Parker continued to bark, and the knocking at the door got a bit louder. There was a muffled voice but I had no clue of who it was trying to get in. I sighed softly before shifting myself to lay Kena down onto the couch. There was the fear of her waking up, but I was certain she would be knocked out for another few hours, at the least. Parker sat in front of the door, looking up at it and barked almost in rhythm. How long had this been going on?

I looked down at the watch on my wrist and inwardly groaned. It was only seven in the morning, and I had stayed up until four trying to get Kena to calm down long enough to get some sleep. It had been a long night. An extremely long night. My neck and back were sore from how I had slept.

Unlocking the door, the knocking stopped, and, keeping Parker back from running out with my foot, I cracked the door open. Instantly the California sunrise hit my eyes and I closed them quickly to keep from blinding myself.

"Cameron?"

I raised my hand to block the sun slightly, but Austin's tall form helped greatly.

"Hey, sorry. I've been up all night with Kena."

"I just heard about Mitch."

"Yeah, Jolie's at the hospital right now. She said they had him in surgery right before Kena and I fell asleep."

"No, Cameron..." Austin steps inside slightly. Parker stops barking, finally, and walks over to the couch to sit beside Kena's head, almost as if guarding her. "Mitch, he... he's gone. Alex just called me twenty minutes ago. He said Jolie disappeared and they have no idea where she went. They tried calling you but you wouldn't answer."

I stare at him, confused, still trying to process all of this with only three hours of sleep keeping me standing. It hits me like a bus.

He's gone.

Without even a farther second to waste, I turn quickly and run up the stairs that lead to Jolie and Mi- ... that lead to Jolie's room. The door is wide open, and I find Jolie sitting on the floor, leaning against the bed frame with one of Mitch's shirts clutched in her hands. Her shoulders are shaking slightly, and the shirt muffles her cries. He's really gone.

She makes no move once I step farther into the room, until I'm entirely beside her, hugging her as she just falls limp against me, sobbing louder. Her blonde hair has lost its usual sheen. Her entire face is puffy and red from the hours and hours of crying I know she's done. I'm surprised there are still tears to cry.

"He's gone," she whispers in between quick inhales, crying more. The right shoulder of my top is completely soaked already. She cries harder and harder until I can barely make out her words of pain as she tries to speak. I simply shush her and tell her to keep crying until she's done. I've almost fallen asleep again when she finally moves away from my shoulder, still clutching Mitch's shirt, and crawls into bed under the soft blanket. I wipe a few tears from my eyes and leave her be the sleep before going back downstairs.

I find Austin sitting on the couch. One hand is scratching Parker behind the ears, while the other has a warm, firm, yet soft grip on Kenadee's shoulder as she rests her head in his lap as a pillow. I stand at the bottom of stairs, watching for a few minutes before he notices me and looks up. His eyes are red and glazed over, from the drinking he and Alan did last night, but they're soft and sad. I walk over to him and sit on the other side of Parker. He shifts and sits in my lap, but shifts again when Austin wraps an arm around me and pulls me into his side.

Resting my forehead against his shoulder, I just sit there and cry. It's been a hard week. I was never much of a drinker since I could never tolerate the taste of liquor and alcohol, but right now I feel like I could guzzle an entire distillery and not have a care in the world about the aftermath.

- I'M A FUCKING MONSTER -

"Miss Hester?"

I look up from my phone and to the secretary, dropping the smile I had when I was reading the texts sent from Tino. I haven't smiled in a while so I knew the expression would be short-lived. Everything was nowadays. Happiness seemed like a fleeting bird that wasn't going to be coming back south for months, if not years.

"Dr. Sontos will see you now."

With a nod, I stood from the chair and picked my bag up off the floor from beside my feet. The door to the adjoining office was open and waiting for me. The secretary smiled as I passed her and she closed the door behind me. Dr. Vivian Sontos was sitting in her usual high-arched leather chair with a notepad in her lap, a pen in her left hand, and her right hand holding a mug of coffee. It was three in the afternoon - I was going to need my own caffeine fix very soon.

Before she can even ask how I am, I sit in the opposite cushioned chair and put my bag in my lap.

"I still can't sleep," I tell her, my thumbs rolling around one another. She frowns, dropping her own smile, and nods; she writes this on her notepad.

"The same dreams?"

"Nightmares," I correct her, still fidgeting. My eyes are bloodshot and have dark rings underneath them from lack of sleep. It's only been a week and a half, but there had been much faith put into those few white pills she had prescribed to me just a few days before.

"It may take up to a week or two for the medicine to begin working fully. Are you still staying at Austin's house?"

I hesitate before shaking my head slowly. "No, I've been at Jolie's for the last week. Her... her husband died and she's been a mess so I've been watching after her daugther, Kenadee..."

Dr. Sontos looks up from her notepad with furrowed brows. "You mean that drunk rockstar in the motorcycle accident?"

I already notice the way her voice rises slightly: she's judging my family and their lifestyle. While I agree it was idiotic for him to drink and drive, he made a mistake and we're just human - we all make mistakes. His just happened to have lasting effect. I purse my lips at her.

"Yeah, the drunk rockstar." The sarcasm is dripping into a puddle at my feet.

I wasn't very close to Mitch. He was usually on tour or out of the house when I went to visit my cousin and her daughter.

Dr. Sontos notices my tone and erases her expression to something blank and goes back to writing on her notepad. "And your dreams?"

"My nightmares haven't changed. It's the same thing. He's holding a knife to my throat as he rips off my clothes."

Ten days. For ten days I've had that same nightmare over and over again; but it was more of a memory than a nightmare. By now, just five minutes in, I'm already wanting to leave and crawl into bed with a cup of espresso and block out the world.

Dr. Sontos continues to write in her notepad, taking sips of her coffee. I can smell it all the way across the room. I want to bath in it, have it wake me up and fill me with some type of energy. I haven't had more than four hours of sleep for the last ten days, and it's slowly killing me. It's filling up my soul and my stomach and crawling up my throat and escaping through my screams for help. But I don't say any of this to Dr. Sontos.

I wouldn't dare say any of that.

I take a deep breath, and Dr. Sontos notices. She takes note. Her pen scratches on the notepad. I look down at my wrist, only to realize I took off my watch. There's no visible clock in the room. I could take out my phone, but she would tell me to put it away before I could even turn on the screen.

"Cameron?"

She surprises me, but I'm not sure how. Then I realize I'm hyperventilating. Shit. Calm down, Cam. You can get through this. It's only your third visit, don't make her send you to a psychic ward.

"Cameron, deep breathes."

I stop my shorten breathes, stop breathing altogether for a good fifteen seconds before I take in one long inhale of oxygen. Dr. Sontos touches my arm, and I jump, realizing she's moved from her chair to sit beside me.

"Come on, Cameron, count to ten with me. One, two, three--"

"Can I go?" I stand up, wringing my hands and looking down at my wrist again before cursing for not wearing my watch. I'm so stupid. "Austin says he has a few more boxes to pack, then he's going to start taking them over to his new place. I said I would help."

"But, Cameron, you've only been here for ten minutes, and we agreed on at least thirty minutes-"

"Well we're obviously getting no where, so I'm just going to go. You'll get your money."

I walk away, but once I'm to the door, Dr. Sontos' voice breaks through my head.

"It's not about the money, Cameron. I truly care for you to get better. No one should have to go through what you're going through, and it's obvious that you're trying to bottle everything up. You're a very independent woman and don't want others waiting hand and foot on you. That's quite obvious, but the people in your life truly care about you getting better." She pauses, but I don't move. She takes in a soft breath before releasing it. "Austin has only known you for a little over a week, and he's already offering you a place to stay so you won't be on your own. That's a very important detail that you're missing."

After that, I just walk out, but when I reach outside the office building, and look at Austin as he waits for me inside his car, playing around with his phone, I realize just what she means. He doesn't see me come out, so I move off to the side and step into the corner cafe barely half a block down. I take out my phone and stare at the message that has been plaguing a majority of my conscious thoughts for the past four days.

Don't believe a word he says. He's a monster.

While I don't want to believe a word of it, or anything that comes from her mouth, I call the number. It rings five times, until the dial tone stops and a high pitched voice answers.

"Did you get my message?"

"Can you meet me?" I ask, not answering her question. I need to figure out what's going on before I burst.

"Yeah, where?"

"There's a cafe on the corner of King Street and Olive Avenue. Can you be here in ten?"

"I can make it five." She hangs up. I stare at the floor for a moment before pulling the phone from my ear and staring at the screen as it cuts from the call to my recent calls screen. I click the number, but this time to edit it as a contact.

Gielle.

Then, as I fall in line to order something to fill my primal craving for caffeine, I send a quick text to Austin.

I'm going to stay the full hour. You can come back at four, no need to wait.

Just a minute later, he replies:

Okie dokie. Call me if you need anything. See ya.

What have I gotten myself into?